Lupus

Recently I met a friend that I worked with in my earlier days. She works in a small, non busy place. This seemed odd to me because when we worked together, she was a real wild cat. She was always the party sort of girl, drinking and dancing. As we talked about old days and new happenings, she opened up to me that she had Lupus.

What's lupus? This was what I was thinking but I did hear about it before. Now I just found out.

Lupus is a chronic inflammatory disease marked by its effect on various parts of the body, including the joints, skin, blood, and kidneys. It is a condition in which the body's immune system attacks its own cells and tissues, resulting in pain, inflammation, and often damage to organs. For many people, the disease is mild and affects only a few organs. For others, however, the disease can be severe and even life threatening.

Lupus involves the immune system. The immune system makes antibodies that work to protect the body against foreign substances like viruses and bacteria. Such foreign bodies are called antigens.

When a person has lupus, his or her body is unable to determine the difference between antigens and the individuals cells and body tissues. As such, the immune system creates antibodies against the individuals own tissues. These antibodies are called auto-antibodies.

When a person has lupus, auto-antibodies react with cells and tissues to form immune complexes. These immune complexes become concentrated in the body. It is this concentration or build-up within body tissues that causes pain, inflammation, and damage.

There are three types of lupus. One type called, discoid lupus, affects the skin. It is characterized by a rash that may appear on the face, neck, or scalp. Individuals with this condition may also experience mouth or nose ulcers, as well as photo-sensitivity. Discoed lupus is diagnosed by performing a biopsy on the rash.

I don't really want to go into details about the subject but I suggest that people check for themselves and find out more so they may be able to help themselves.

Bar advice.There is , supposedly, no known cure for Lupus. Lets hope we all never need to hear a doctor tell us that we have it. Anyway my friend is doing well with medication.

Stop taking baggage to bed.

You wash your face and brush your teeth, put on an alluring smile and hop into bed with your sweetie. Then start dragging your body image baggage under the covers with you.

For some people this means bringing a tiny speck of a change purse – for others it’s a designer handbag. For those who are the most consumed with their body image this could mean an entire set of monogrammed leather bags in various sizes or, worse, a giant garbage sack filled to the brim!

Where’s the room for a satisfying sex life with all of that?

The baggage consists of those destructive thoughts you have about the size of your thighs, the tone of your tummy, the amount of hair on your body. You worry that your partner will notice or worse, be completely repulsed by you.

If you drag all of those negative beliefs about your body into bed, they can wreak havoc with your sex life.

Unlike you, your partner is probably not thinking about your alleged “flaws” or 'shortcomings' as they are thinking about how much they want to make love to you, and be made love to in return.

They are turned on by the touch of your skin, your smell, your smile. Most of all they are excited by your confidence and openness and your willingness to be in bed with them in the first place!

If you are obsessed with parts of your body, this can have a negative impact on the quality of your sex life for you and your partner. Love-making is a way to bring a couple closer together but you can’t give yourself to the moment if you are constantly wondering what your partner is thinking about with regards to parts of your body. (It probably isn’t what you think!)

Take a moment before you hop into bed to put those fears and insecurities to rest. Your sweetie is waiting for you – ALL of you – to hop into bed. So look into that bathroom mirror, give yourself a 1000 watt smile and remember that it’s the whole package that’s delivered, not just parts.

Bar advice.Set that baggage outside the door, and hang up the 'Do Not Disturb' sign. You’ve got better things to think about!

How to shower: Women vs Men

Bar advice. Guys stuff here is fairly true but ladies seem to have been softened up a little. I think I've been around long enough to know that a lot of the girls don't really do all this and so nice as well.

Against Breast Cancer

Bar advice. Remember, anyone can get breast cancer.

Learn more about breast cancer.

Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book is an excellent resource for anyone facing the possibility of breast cancer or a loved one's diagnosis. Even if you've read a prior edition, so much has advanced in the field of treatment and options that it is worthwhile to get the newest edition. The book helps the reader to have a better understanding of all different aspects of breast problems, diagnosis, and treatment options. It's a must read before you go to a doctor as well as after to help one better understand it all. It's a book you'll keep picking up again and again.

Bar advice. What have you got to loose. Information is the key to better understanding the problem and the cure.Most people don't want to read or even hear about it because they think that by talking about it they will get it. The 'C' word is not a death sentence.

Fight Cancer-Matcha green tea

This is a good matcha for the price. The best matcha can be much more expensive but well worth it, especially if you happen to study the Japanese tea ceremony or you are a tea connoisseur. If you do get this type of tea, it is wise to buy a proper bamboo whisk and sift it first, otherwise it can get lumpy. Making matcha the traditional way is well worth the effort and there is a lot to learn about it. Some say to master the tea ceremony can take years. Not to worry this is easier.

This tea is premium. Don't accept green tea in bags; it is less tasty and probably less healthy.

Here are just a few medical conditions in which drinking green tea is reputed to be helpful:

* cancer
* rheumatoid arthritis
* high cholesterol levels
* cardiovascular disease
* infection
* impaired immune function
* acne, omg.
And drink four cups a day for the ultimate tea benefits!

Bar advice. This may not be a cure and it may not even prevent the cancer from starting up but it's always better to do something to prevent it from starting then to wait and get the news suddenly. Better warned is better armed.

Things women should know about breast cancer.

Breast cancer is a reality many women will have to deal with. Statistics show that one woman out of nine will develop breast cancer in her life. Whether it be a dear friend, a close family member or herself, every woman will be touched by breast cancer in one way or the other. Breast cancer accounts for about 30% of all cancers.

Recently my cousin and even a friend got it. My mum also died of it so I thought I'd share some stuff to people that need a plan to help themselves. Here are some tips and knowledge.

Every woman should be aware of the risk factors and change those she can to lower her risk of developing breast cancer in her life.

Women who are not active physically, smoke or consume a lot of alcohol are at higher risk to develop breast cancer.

Women who have their first child at a later age or have never given birth are at higher risk to develop breast cancer.

Women who had their first period at an earlier age (less than 12 years old) are at higher risk for breast cancer.

Woman who have close family members who had develop breast cancer are at higher risk for themselves.

Women who are older. The further a woman advances in life, the higher her probability of developing breast cancer.

Women who experience a late menopause (after 55 years old) have an increase risk of developing breast cancer.

There is hope however and certain measures have proven to help reduce the risk of developing breast cancer for a woman. It is recommended to exercise regularly, lose any excess weight, lower alcohol consumption and stop smoking. It is also proven that women who breastfeed their babies are at lower risks to develop breast cancer.

Certain measures, by finding breast cancer at an earlier stage can lower the complication rate and morbidity associated with this condition. The two most recommended measures are to do a mammogram exam every two years after the age of 50 (or earlier if a woman has risk factors) and doing a breast self-examination. It is also recommended for a woman to visit her doctor regularly. One has to know that about two thirds of breast tumours are found by the woman herself upon doing her self-examination.

Bar advice.Many organizations and industries have joined forces to push back breast cancer and one can only encourage them by donating time or money for this worthy cause. There are many researches on breast cancer conducted worldwide and it is expected that the near future will see the decline of this devastating affliction. This is not to scare you but to empower you with this info.

Seven techniques of presuasive language

No matter what you do and what you want to achieve in your life, there will come a time when you need to persuade someone to see things the way that you do. This doesn’t necessarily mean that they will agree with you, but you will want to understand the basics of persuasive language in order to increase your success in these kinds of situations.

A metaphorical method

Just as in good writing, using other words can help you to persuade someone to your viewpoint. Some of this isn’t meant to be deceptive, but rather it will help to allow the other person to see what you mean if they can not understand it in the way that you are describing it. For example, if you’re trying to explain the benefits of a new water heater, you might want to describe it as the money maker because of its efficiency and better energy consumption.

Change what you mean

Another way to use language to persuade people is to change what you mean what you are talking. This isn’t necessarily about changing what you think, but rather changing what it sounds like by changing the meaning. Better put, when you want to change the way that a romantic or business partner acts, you will try to change your persuasion into seeming to benefit the relationship itself, rather than to change the behavior. You don’t talk about what they’re doing wrong; you talk about what you want them to do so that the relationship can be better.

The words you choose

People can become persuaded by the details rather than the bigger ideas. When you see a commercial for the newest technological advance, don’t you find that you get swept up in the new features rather than the overall use? When you’re trying to persuade someone into seeing something the same way you do, you can try to use more descriptive words in order to make them see the situation the way that you do.

Sales techniques

When sales people want to persuade someone to do something or buy something, they use various forms of persuasive phrases and words. For example, you can say something like, ‘Well, that’s good, but this is better’ or something like, ‘That’s not all.’ Think about your favorite commercials and advertisements and slogans that they might have used. Try to see how you might be able to incorporate their slick moves into your next argument.

Punctuate for them

When you’re writing something down for your partner or in a business situation, using important punctuation can help to signify the parts that are most important to you. However, you can go overboard with this as well. Too many exclamation points can show that you might be a little over-anxious or excited. They can also look like you don’t know what words to emphasize so you just emphasize them all with these pieces of punctuation.

Words that convey emotion

When talking with someone that you know well, you will want to use words and phrases that they already associate with something good. For example, in a romantic or personal relationship, you can allude to inside or private jokes as a way to make your current points or you can use words that have special meanings to you in order to make the rest of your argument seem relevant to their needs.This will take planning on your part to consider what the other person wants to hear from you and where they are coming from in your conversation.

How you put your words together

If you’re trying to make someone feel comfortable, you will want to use more casual language, while if you’re trying to impress someone, a formal kind of syntax will yield the better results for you. Realize who you are addressing and what they will be looking for when you are speaking. This method can also backfire when you aren’t comfortable with the words that you are using. You will need to become comfortable with what you are saying in order to show that you are confident in what you are trying to tell them.

Bar advice.Persuasion is really about what you say and how you say it. Also it involves what you know. If you take the time to fully understand your audience as well as what you want to achieve, you will be successful. Be it a realtionship, work, business or family.

Take a holiday

Anyone who travels regularly is aware of luggage and carry-on restrictions post 9-11. However, if you travel abroad, there are other considerations to keep in mind. No foreign country wants undesirable insects, rodents, or diseases to infiltrate their population via border crossings.

Before reading further, remember that if you have outstanding police warrants or a criminal record, you should probably forget about foreign travel.Period.

In a relationship we sometimes need to get away for a short trip. Sometimes we need to get away from each other. Whatever it may be here is what NOT to take with you.

Regulations vary by country. The snacks you pack for a domestic flight may not pass customs inspection for an overseas destination. Start with a good dose of 'common sense' and you will quickly realize why most of the items on the following list are not permitted:

Beer, wine, or other alcoholic beverages that have been opened

Pets without appropriate vaccination certificates

Native wildlife

Weapons or toys and other items that look like weapons

Big game bagged while on your safari or hunting trip

Prescription drugs without an accompanying doctor's prescription

Drugs, vitamins, or nutritional supplements with unreadable labels

Illegal drugs or paraphernalia. It's a DEATH PENALTY in some countries, like Singapore.

Potted houseplants, seeds, soil, pebbles, or sand.

Natural products like seashells, pieces of coral reef, whalebone

Uncooked pork, poultry, beef, and other meat or animal products

Unprocessed or uncooked vegetables, fruits, tubers, roots, etc.

Hay, straw, oats, and similar items

Any other natural products that may harbor diseases or pests

Fireworks and incendiary devices

Clothing and souvenirs manufactured with any of the above products

Some prohibited articles may be allowed with appropriate permits or certification. If you don't know for sure, don't pack them or bring them back home with you.

What you MUST take with you.

Imagine your chagrin should you go through customs on your return trip and discover that you must pay duty on your laptop computer, digital camera, and jewelry even though you purchased them in your own country prior to your trip. Yes, it can and does happen. Protect yourself!

Pack copies of documents such as sales receipts, credit card statements, insurance policies, and appraisals for all valuable items to prove ownership and purchase date especially for anything that looks like new.

No receipts or paperwork? Take a picture of each item next to a newspaper that plainly displays a readable date. Note the serial number(s) with each photo. Keep all photos and paperwork in a safe place along with your passport and other important documents. They will be invaluable when you fill in customs declarations - both leaving and returning.

Do Your Homework

Spend some time doing research on the Internet before you travel. You should be able to find a government or embassy website that provides the regulations online.Lets say you are going on Vacation Barcelona, do searches such as:

- customs regulations Spain

Bar advice.Advance investigation may save you considerable time, money, and effort as you pass through each border crossing.Be aware! The resulting peace of mind will make your holiday much more enjoyable. Bon voyage.

How to drive women wild in bed.

It's so simple to learn and confidence becomes your middle name. Never be afraid of not satisfying any woman ever again!!!

This book does seem to empower women more in the sack but if you learn all these techniques and apply them, trust me, she'll never forget you. In a way, this really helps those that are in a relationship already then those that are not because some of the stuff has to be a two way thing and if you're just met someone she may not be too keen to go all the way. However, why let that stop you. When you meet a girl for the first time and you want to impress her, than this info will come in handy.

Bar advice.Don't always think you know everything as a man and not be willing to learn or try new things. All women are different as well. One way works for one while the same may not apply to another. Women's bodies are psysically different as well.One thing is for certain. You'll be a little more prepared with this info.

Penis Problems

Nothing in the world excites you better than sex…it’s an irrepressible desire…you can not run away from sex by any means. Sex is an ultimate enhancer as well as a drastic depressor; sexual dissatisfaction leaves you in vulnerable position.

A good sex is a sensational experience; it rejuvenates your mind and body and increases your self-belief. But there are times when little Johnny does not supports you, you desperately want it but you can’t have it, and this is the time when manhood is at stake.

In medical terms the problem is christened as Erectile Dysfunction, it is defined as the inability to keep up erection essential for sexual gratification, to be a bit more precise, it can be categorized as temporary or short term erectile dysfunction or permanent erectile dysfunction. About 150 million men around the world are under its grasp, its thoroughly different form other sexual problems related to orgasm or reluctance towards sex.Some vital factors contributing to erectile dysfunction are-

Diabetes, high cholesterol, and early stages of heart disease can cause erectile dysfunction.Emotional disorder, problem in relationship.Socioeconomic issues.Smoking and alcoholism.Lack of frequent erection. (It adds to it, hence the saying, 'Use it or loose it")

Many guys go to the bars to pick up women because they have this problem and sometimes they find that it's not working that night but it won't hurt too much because he'll never see her again. Sometimes it works well because she may have triggered a fantasy in his mind and all went well so everything worked out. Whatever the case it seems that all the factors can add to the dysfunction or not. what can a guy do then.

Maybe you want to try out some alternative medicine or treatment. Why not? Then there's Viagra. The magic blue pill that has been around awhile now and helps a lot of people. There's one problem. It does have side effects. We have heard this and the scientist have said so but people still take it. If ever it causes a problem later in life then you can't sue them because they have disclosed that side effects may occur in people. Great idea to let that info out of the bag in case of future lawsuits.What other ways then?

This bottle may help.

One better thing you can do for yourself is to get a healthy lifestyle going. Eat differently and really find out what supplements you need to take to enhance your metabolism.Make sure you can get ingredients that include, Panax Ginseng root,Epimedium Sagittatum(Ying Yang Hua),Tribulus terrestris fruit and more. You got to check it out for yourself.Get help if you have to. Whatever the case may be, it's in your best interest to sort it out now because the loss of use of the penis will some how bring about depression in your life and your partner.

Bar advice. The fact that there are millions of people with this problem out there some how doesn't seem to help. You feel that you're all alone in this matter. No one to talk about it and not sure what to do.Here is the best piece of advise that I can hand out to you. GO SEE A DOCTOR. I don't just mean the specialist for this particular issue but also a psychiatrist to deal with the emotional anxiety as well.

Overweight? You can still enhance your sex life.

You could try one of the many sexual enhancement drugs available today. You could sign up for very expensive workshops and retreats. You could even strip down and pole dance for your partner.

My guess is that these things just aren't your style. I believe that you're seeking natural and balanced healing for your sex drive and your overweight body.

You're tired, your energy is low and you aren't feeling quite like you think you should. Age is catching up as well. You don't have unrealistic expectations. You do have some dreams you've hung onto despite your physical size. You've clung to them, knowing that some day those dreams would take you to a place inside you where you were finally ready to take control.Once you embark on a journey of self-discovery and empowerment, you can never plead ignorance again. You can never say "I didn't know".

Your sex drive does not need to take a complete dive while you're in the process of losing weight. That extra weight does not have to be like carrying heavy sacks of spuds around. It doesn't have to tire you out. Here are simple things you can do to help energize you and lighten the load..


You can make sure your daily food intake contains the highest possible raw content you can achieve up to about 80%. For now, to go much higher is a path you can move into. Keep the raw fruits and veggies separate and your energy level will steadily climb. Your body will respond to what you feed it. It has no choice, chemically speaking.

Step in place for ten minutes. Hardly a spit in the ocean of time in your day. Get up and do this for yourself. I promise you will love yourself for it. Walk around the house. Preferably outside and breathing with a full inhale/exhale. The more you move, the more you’ll be able to move both in your live and in your love life. You don’t want your partner to have to do all the work do you? Keep your eye on the prize. It’s your dream. You can make it happen!

Make the choice to work at your sex life. Most especially if you and your partner have been together a long time. Sometimes things just need sprucing up. If you feel too overweight to feel sexy, try splitting a bottle of pleasant red wine. Put on something nice and enhance the mood of your room. Work at it. Overweight, underweight or just perfect, people have to make the effort to keep the sexual tension alive.

Tend to your physical appearance. Sometimes in our daily lives, we forget to take a moment to add the little touches that we used to do daily. Trim those stray hairs or apply that bit of lipstick. Guys cut your nails.Small things can enhance your appearance and the way you walk, adding confidence to your style. When we take care of ourselves, we stand taller and feel better about ourselves.

Don’t let life get in the way of preserving the passion and fire you and your partner once had. Don’t let the pounds you’re in the process of losing, discourage you from feeling just as sexy as you did. You’ll get there again and when you do, you’ll still have your mate. The one you fell in love with. Don’t let anything get in the way. Schedule dates with your mate and make the effort.

Bar advice.We have all sorts of obstacles in life and each one can seem insurmountable at the time. Later, we can see each in perspective and sometimes even with humor. Don’t let tomorrow’s comic relief get you down today. Do something about your sex life and the drive will take care of itself.Also, if you think young, you'll be all the time. No matter what the mirror tells you.

Chinese New Year 2007

Children born in the last part of the year of the Pig tend to be good-natured kids. They also make prosperous grownups. If I were still in the having children stage, I might very well attempt to hatch one or two bambinos in 2007. Seriously, if you are thinking of having a child, this coming year is ideal. Little Piglets know how to put up with all manner of adversity. They can sleep right through your loudest music and weather your marital spats, will eat anything you offer them that tastes good (and then some!) and usually grow up to be both generous and rich. What could be better than an easygoing kid who turns into a rich adult who enjoys your company and takes care of you when you're old? So much for progeny. What about the rest of humanity in this upcoming Pig year?

Well, the Red Fire Pig (oftentimes referred to as the Golden Pig) year has an odd sort of reputation. Although Pig years usually offer us cornucopias of plenty, truckloads of conviviality and earthy pleasures unbound, this particular Pig year will be a bit skewed. Yes. It is definitely about excess and abundance. You will be reading more and more articles and watching videos and seeing movies about "The Biggest Meal" and "The Most Expensive Cars and Houses and Boats" and "The Most Wanton and Beautiful Women" and the "Most Popular Singers and Actors and Idols of All Types and Stripes." It will be a year of the MOST BIGGEST BEST.

This "Most-ness" and "Biggest-ness" and "Best-ness" however is not thoroughly positive. Why? Because an atmosphere of planetary over supply has been created. This notion of surplus is of course bogus and has bestowed a false sense of confidence about the future on many. This imagined excess forebodes a glut which will necessarily tip the scales toward overload. And Readers, in the Red Pig Year, we in the "developed" countries have got OVERLOAD up the kazoo.

Too much of every THING and very little of what counts. Health will be shaky. Fitness will suffer. Spiritual quests will be abandoned in favor of shopping for major purchases or first class traveling to sunny venues where the beautiful beaches have more beautiful beaches and the piña coladas weigh in at 3 liters. You will see. Big Macs will get bigger. Big deals will grow tentacles and become even bigger deals. If you thought it was impossible just wait and see - even the SUV will get bigger and take up more road space and guzzle more gas. If you thought it couldn't get "glutsier" just you wait and see.

Some of us might think that's the good news. We are all going to have more "stuff' in the Pig year. Real estate and luxury items, jewelry and antiques, authentic old masters - everything having to do with wealth and affluence will be favored. But... this abject profusion of material possession means that anyone who is not rich or prosperous or rolling in gold bullion cubes will - by virtue of the scales being tipped too far - fare worse. Down down down they go and where it stops nobody know.

Hence 2007 promises to intensify the division between rich and poor. Not that I can predict whether it will be Africa or Asia or America or Argentina or Australia which goes down the tubes; but I can clearly see that the very very underprivileged people in the over populated and underfed places in these areas of the planet will not get richer. They will not have enough to eat and will not have clean water and will suffer far more than they are suffering at this moment. Whilst those of us who have plenty and already eat too much will be acquiring more goods, using an increasing amount of resources and services and getting fatter and taking longer, more glamorous vacations. We fat cats will be driving larger, more opulent vehicles and sending our children to more exclusive private schools and playing more classy golf and swanky tennis and other "noble" types of games. In this Red Fire Pig year, I am sorry to repeat the old adage but it's true: The rich get richer and the poor get children.

You may retort that this sorry state of affairs has always existed. And you would be right - to a degree. But this year because of the gawping abyss which will result from the gap between rich and poor people and their respective countries, all variety of clashes will arise. It will be a year of arguments leading to disputes and wars. A year of petty nuisances leading to gigantic legal battles. Not a feisty year like the Rooster or a perpetually justice-seeking year like the Dog, but a year of conflicts, hostilities, aggression.

Do not despair. If you are reading this, you have a computer. And you have a place to use it in, which supposes a roof over your head and no bombs falling on same. Hence, the battles and contention of which I speak probably will not directly affect you. You will be more likely to be wallowing in chateaux or sizing up the yacht you plan to acquire or investing in art and antiques on one of your numerous jaunts to exotic lands. You (and your computer) are part of the fortunate prosperity population.

Anything else to recount about this coming Pig year? Oh yes there is. Lots. It's worthy of note that while this sort of Pig year is indeed excellent for getting married and bearing children, it nonetheless promises to occasion many partings of the way. You may mourn a loved one or lament a close friend's moving to a foreign country. Divorce will be on the rise. Yet many older people will remarry and some of them will marry people many years younger than themselves. Also, because of the tone of impending clash, there will necessarily be political agitation, traffic or air space congestion and an overall snowballing of potentially incendiary events. One tiny out-of-place remark this year can lead to a battle royal. People will be arrested or jailed for minor offenses which, in other times, would seem trivial or trite. Families will break up over minor quarrels or differences of opinion. Thriving businesses will suddenly fail because of some apparently stupid accounting blunder.

In this ambiance we are then well-advised to maintain what the Pig is so famous for - Decorum. Manners. Style. Protocol. When there is a surfeit of electricity in the air, we should endeavor to behave in a courteous, reasonable, tolerant and understanding manner. The Pig is far from perfect. But he or she is always known for being ineffably attracted to what is real, genuine and authentic. No costume jewelry for the Pig. No ersatz Beluga caviar or watered down Bordeaux wants to pass his pristine lips. This will not be year for chicanery either. Pigs have a kind of natural benevolence, but they are fussy about fine quality and have no room in their lives for shabby merchandise or shady people.

Fire and Water elements are at odds in this year's Chinese Astrological pattern which is known as the "Female" Red Fire Pig configuration. This means (roughly) that we have to fear any and all disasters that have to do with Fire (volcanoes, forest fires, explosions, bombs, earthquakes and other incendiary events) or water (Floods, Tsunamis, Hurricanes, Typhoons etc.). We shouldn't be afraid. But we ought to try to be more cautious about where we store things and how we protect ourselves, our families and belongings with everything from carbon monoxide alarm systems to waterproofing and massive coverage by excellent insurance plans.

To sum up, the Fire Pig Year will bestow twelve months of plenty on those of us who already have enough. And it promises to further impoverish the others. If you are a charitable soul, then be prepared during the Pig year to give away some of your newfound riches. I am not suggesting you send a bland impersonal check for a thousand dollars to a charity organization. They might only use it to do more advertising. Rather I advise you to give a hand to people in trouble, a leg up to someone who has had bad luck or cannot get a job. Lend and even give away money to those who find themselves ill and without insurance. Sometimes just a few extra bills in the pocket of person in dire straits can lift their spirits enough to begin to propel them out of the dumps. Give a bit of extra money to a man who is out of work and he might be able to avoid a family crisis by inviting the wife and kids out for pizza or ice cream or both. If you haven't got any extra money yourself, but you do have some strength to spare, go mow the lawn for the lady who broke her hip or do some grocery shopping for a man who is alone or old or ill. Take care of peoples' kids or offer to wash their car or clean their house. When other folks are in need, they are often too proud to ask for help. Don't just offer. Bypass their resistance. Go and Do for the needier than you.

As the year 2007 has already begun in the western world, we can see it will not be a peaceable one. There are already skirmishes and in-fighting going on everywhere from Spain to Chechnya and Kosovo in London and Paris and Amsterdam - not to mention the disgraceful situation in Iraq. Civil wars will break out. Normally peaceful people will inexplicably freak out and explode in the faces of their neighbors.

But as I said earlier, do not despair. Keep yourself and your loved ones safe. Instead of mouthing off about what's bothering you, turn your tongue over seven times before speaking and above all, in this potentially super charged year of prosperous conflict - keep your shirt on Dude. The Pig year is the final one in the cycle of twelve Chinese animal signs. Since the last Pig year (1994) we have seen all variety of behaviors come and go. Lately, it seems as though we have all been living in or worrying about some war zone or another. Well, you will be happy to know that with the exit of the Pig year "The Testosterone Era" is over. More and more women are engaging in politics. We must seriously consider voting for those courageous women, encourage them to take the reins and become our leaders. 2008 is a Rat year. A new beginning. Rats are about power and charm and protectiveness and hoarding supplies for the hard times ahead. That's what women are about too. Taking care of their own.

Bar advice.The above is a excerpt from Suzanne White's website about what is her predictions for the coming year. Take note that she is not a psychic but has her personal views based on the astrology of the Chinese zodiac. No one can predict the future for sure.

One word we all know- F&#K

Bar advice. We all have use this once in a while. From the good to the bad. We take a look at a humorous side at this word that is used and understood in almost every country.

Music and love

Bar advice. If you ever needed music for yourselves as a couple or alone then Josh Groban will do that for you. It lifts you up musically ans spiritually. If you're not yet a fan, you will be.

Will gives relationship advice

Bar advice. Conversation is the key. People that are in a relationship should talk to others to get a better ideas of what they want because some still don't know what they are looking for in a partner. Seeing the problem in others may just bring yours to the surface as well. Will says " A crazy guy at the bus stop doesn't know he's crazy", till he's told. So, listen and learn.

FHM -Jenny McCarthy on fitness

Bar advice. You sex life may need a rethink. Unless you don't care about sex anymore then don't bother. For me, I'll still want to 'do it' till I'm ninety. I've never really been out of shape but even I need to improve as I get older. Listen to your own body.

Finding the 'Right guy'.

Are you being yourself? As long as you resist being your natural, balanced self, you will not attract harmonious, long lasting, or healthy relationships. Once you become true to yourself, you automatically attract the right person to you. You can access and balance own unique vibration of energy to reveal your innate power and beauty within to attract the type of relationships you desire.Here are some tips for you women.

You Broadcast Who You Are and What You Want

What you think about, you attract. When you are cautious and hold back your true self, you attract similar situations to you. If you think you are not sufficient, not wise enough, or not powerful enough to create the reality you truly desire, you will attract a representation of your own doubt in yourself.

Attract Balanced Relationships

If you look for someone else to 'complete' you, you attract an incomplete relationship. What you create is a partnership made up of two half people, that will not satisfy either person.When you feel complete and sufficient, you set up a vibration that attracts those with the similar qualities. When you reflect the type of vibrations you choose to attract in someone else, you will be seen and recognized by Mr.Wonderful.

Re-ignite Your Attractive Power

Balance your female energy to reignite your attractive power. When you flood your body with your own female energy, your body automatically seeks its original perfect balance. With practice your system will stay in balance effortlessly. This way you can experience your ultimate sexual and creative power.

Become Clear and Certain About What You Want

Connecting with your innate power and sexual force spawns a new level of self certainty. Your confidence will soar and you may find yourself achieving goals you long forgot. As you get neutral to foreign energies that compete for space in your body, you become clear, grounded and focused.

Follow Your Own Path

Life is a journey, and you have everything you need to create the most desirable, enjoyable and fulfilling journey for yourself. Take steps each day to reach your life goals, and you will not only be amazed at how well you will achieve them, but at how enjoyable and stress free the journey will be.

Increase Your Natural Sex Appeal

Everyone has both male and female energies. Sometimes someone from your past has turned off your female energy. It affects how and what you attract in your life. Practice increasing the amount of female energy flowing in your body. This will increase your sex appeal and attraction.

Your Attractive Force Within IS Powerful

Your renewed personal power will revolutionize your relationships. When you increase your own sexual energy you increase self-confidence, boost your attractiveness and create balance.People around you will notice a positive change in you. They may not put their finger on it but you will know why they respond favorably.Practice this connecting to this energy for 20-30 days and the results will astonish you. Have fun with a renewed sense of your self.

Bar advice. It takes a lot effort but the pay off is good. Why? Well, you end up getting relationships going at a better pace and level. All the time you spent saying the words "He's not the One" will never be said again. Women make that mistake and are left on the 'shelve'(so to speak) and don't know what to do after that. Wake up girl!

Here women can better understand men so that they can have genuine, authentic relationships once the differences are understood. It takes away a lot of the guesswork, and bring valuable advice, tests, questions, and answers that will help women be authentic, real, and genuine while learning how to relate to the man they are with, once they understand their basic inherent differences.

There are a lot of interviews with men in this book that provide the basis for what turns them off, and how they genuinely want to share in an authentic relationship with a woman who is real, as opposed to setting a trap, or manipulating them. Highly recommended for its authenticity and valuable insight.

Bar advice.Somethings your mother's did not teach you, probably because they didn't know themselves, and you need to know. This is a great book for anyone who is going to have a relationship. Never underestimate the power of knowledge.

Things that turn women off

No matter the subject it as always as useful to know what not to do, as it is to know what to do. So, today, we're going to talk about what not to do when it comes to attraction. This will give you guys a handy guide of things to avoid when interacting with any sexy woman.

First off, don't try to impress her by talking about yourself, how much money you make, the sport you like, etc., etc. Believe me, she's heard all that before, by men who are smarter, better looking, and more successful than you. Instead, ask her genuine, open-ended questions about herself, and pay close attention to her answers. Shut off the conversation in your own head, and pay attention to her. You'll be amazed at how this creates attraction.

Don't ask her if "you can take her out," or if she "has a boyfriend," or if you can "have her number." You're letting her define the relationship, which sexy women hate. In addition, questions like these activate subconscious processes that lead to autopilot answers like, NO!. It's the same thing as a salesperson asking you, "Can I help you?" and you saying, "No thanks, just looking." Switch the question to, "What specifically are you looking for?" and you'll get a better answer. Same thing when setting up a second meeting with the woman you're talking to. "Let's continue this conversation over coffee sometime," works a heck of a lot better than, "Can I take you out?"

Don't shower her with compliments about her beauty, looks, etc.

She's already heard it, and knows you're trying to "compliment your way into her pants." Idiot! Treat her like a human being, ask her about her hopes, dreams, and desires from a place of genuine interest, not the ulterior motive of getting your hands on her. Although it sounds obvious, this is actually a very subtle shift in thinking for most men. She'll pick up on the fact that you're not lusting after her, when every other guy she's talked to that day is and she'll start to wonder what's different about you. Give her a "bad time in a good way," teasing her about her looks, what she says, etc.

Attraction is a give and take, it has a rhythm to it. Switch from sincere to teasing, and back again. It's this switching that creates attraction.

Don't ask her, "So where do you want to go?" Take the lead, and suggest several places by saying "Hey, let's go here(name place)sound good to you?" is much better than the above question. If she doesn't want to go there, then ask her for suggestions. Believe it or not, this is a big breakthrough.Don't plan your life around her.Live your own. This kills more relationships than probably anything else. Women want to be with a strong guy, not a surrogate mommy to a little kid.

Bar advice.A lot of these things are common sense, but as they say, common sense ain't so common. Most of us are socially conditioned to do the things I just mentioned, and we actively have to avoid them. I know I do. Even with everything I know, I occasionally find myself slipping back into the above behaviors, and they lead to predictable results. The death of attraction.

Valentine's radical responsibility

When you assume radical personal responsibility, you live in a truth that proclaims:
I am responsible for how I allow others to affect me.In a world of forces beyond my control, I can learn to be the keeper of my own heart and mind.

Even when things appear not to be going my way, and I am upon an emotional sea of crossing and diverging currents, I can still navigate my way to my ultimate good fortune.I proclaim that I am not a victim of the world I see. I am a co-creator of it. Let love and wisdom be my moral compass, and let clarity be the wind in my sails.

New peace, harmony, and power fill your relationships when you practice radical personal responsibility. Through it, you enter a more refined sphere of relating that enhances your life and accelerates the realization of your ultimate spiritual self. Practicing radical personal responsibility forever changes the way you approach and resolve conflict.

Jealousy and other emotions like it can appear to be happening to us or to be inflicted on us by others. But to address the root cause of any upset, you must learn to observe the internal factors that shape your own perceptions and reactions. We call this ability to observe yourself and realize your power to alter these perceptions and reactions Radical Personal Responsibility.

We call it radical because it is such a departure from what is commonly thought of as responsibility, which can mean laying blame. Instead, it is insight into the deeper workings of your mind that illuminates how you have contributed to any challenging situation before you.

When you take personal responsibility, what are you taking responsibility for? You are taking responsibility for your own consciousness and the effects that it creates. The thoughts, beliefs, feelings, attitudes, impressions, perceptions, and interpretations, all of which you hold in your consciousness, can be a matter of choice.

If you are like most people, you are unaware of all the moments of choosing that go into your beliefs and your interpretations. You probably haven't noticed you are making choices all the time, choices that determine the possibilities that will be open or closed to you in your future.

If it feels as if your beliefs just show up fully developed and you have nothing to do with how they came to be a part of you, it is because you have not developed the ability to observe your own mind. The CURE (Conscious Upset Resolution Exercise) will help you.

Most of your beliefs were probably “absorbed” from your family when you were younger. The rest of them were absorbed from the community you grew up in and from the culture at large. The process of absorbing them was invisible to you, so you didn't notice you were doing it. It happened silently, in the background of your life. The process of absorbing your beliefs was invisible to you.

Regaining that awareness and accepting personal responsibility is an acquired skill. If it wasn't demonstrated for you when you were growing up, or you haven't intentionally studied it, chances are you haven't a clue about how to do it.

A start is to recognize what personal responsibility is not. In the absence of personal responsibility, all you can do is blame others for your difficulties because it looks to you as if they are to blame. This forever dooms you to a “victim” mentality that separates you from your personal power and spiritual and relational maturity. The CURE will teach you, step by step, to approach life’s hurdles in a different way that both enlightens and empowers you.

Once you learn to practice radical personal responsibility, you will find a source of inner strength and power that no one can ever take away from you. Because of your ability to take authentic, empowered responsibility, you will find that, in time, upsets become less frequent, of shorter duration, and less intense. This means you have more time and energy to focus on living the kind of life and sharing the kind of relationships you truly want and deserve.

Bar advice. While you are thinking with the situation of Valentines, you got to remember the responsibilities of actions that may happen that night. Also, what happens after in terms of work, business, family, yourself, etc. Why I say all this? Well, the things we do on Valetine's day may add or subtract to our daily lives. think about it responsibly.

Valentine's Day. How it started.

Ever wondered how February 14th( Valentines Day) became, the day on which we celebrate and explore love in all its many ideals, Valentine's Day.

There are many differing opinions on how Valentine's Day started.

One story say that when the Roman Empire reigned, a festival every February was held in honour of the God of Fertility and during this time, young men would choose their mate. When a Emperor named Claudius came around, he outlawed all marriages in fear that the men would not be able to fight. Young couples still fell in love though and still wished to marry and they took these desires to the Catholic Bishop Valentine who, understanding love, began to secretly marry couples. When Claudius found out, he had Valentine arrested and ordered him put to death. While waiting in jail, Valentine began exchanging letters with the jailers daughter and soon had fallen in love with her. The day he was to be beheaded, he wrote her one last note and signed it: From Your Valentine.

Another story points to Christianity in 496 A.D outlawing the pagan Lupercian Festival and replacing it with a day in February to honour the martyr St. Valentine.

A third story as to the origin of passing out cards stems from a French Count who was captured and imprisoned in London. From his cell he wrote his wife letters, including a passionate set of poems which he sent to her in February.

At the turn of the century, a new form of Valentines Day card appeared the Penny Dreadful. Up until this point, cards were relatively expensive but the Penny Dreadful changed all that. They were just what the name implied, costing only one cent and completely bad. The cards were cheaply made, the artwork was amateurish and the colouring was uneven. On top of that the verses printed on them were not the most romantic of prose. They were more often insults, taking swipes at old maids, teachers and the like. Still their low cost kept them popular for years.

For hundreds of years, Valentine's Day has been a day of symbols. You can hardly go through the day without seeing a rose (as a symbol to Venus, the Goddess of Love), images of doves and lovebirds (who mate for life) or hearts. The heart was thought to be the centre of all emotion. People believed that when they gave a heart, they were truly giving all of the love and emotion that they possibly could give.

It's past aside, Valentine's Day is the second the most popular card sending holiday just behind Christmas with one billion a cards sent a year. When the calendar turns to February, we start to think of love. February has for centuries been designated the month for lovers, with the primary celebration being on February 14, St. Valentine's Day. We send cards, flowers, and candy and our children give out Valentines in school. Valentine's Day reminds us to tell our loved ones just how much we care about them.

Bar advice. Whatever the start was, which is hard to know, we all have to remember just one thing; Love was the the main point of this and rightly so. Why? Well if, at least one thing, we remember the love that our mother, father, sister, brother and other extensions of family have given us. This brings us back to roots of seeing ourselves and how others see us as well.

Sex and drinking- Should you?

Drinking is known as the number one 'panties/boxers remover' in the whole world. We all know that we should not drink and drive, but what about drinking and running to bed? We are not so sure about that, and those who have experienced having sex after drinking will probably agree and remember how big the mistake is.

Here are 7 reasons why not to drink and run to bed:

*The mature lover

The mature ladies love to have sex and like all of us they have that need. If we are talking about the ladies that are quite old, they have defiantly that need and probably have not done it for a long time. She will wait for you while you get drunk in the bar, and when you are done with you 8th drink she will get you. Some of you will say, 'great'. Ok, we all have our style. To each his own I guess.

* Unknown sexual background

She is hot, she has a great figure and she is willing to get to bed with you after the second drink...but she will wait until you are done with the bottle, so it will be more difficult for you the notice the 'extra' body part she has.(She's a He, get it?)

* Your best friend

You always knew that he is a bit different, and every time you have looked at a great looking girl's breasts, he was looking at her boyfriend's ass. Even though he does not fancy you, he will after the 3rd drink, and you start to have the,'I need some sex' feelings. After your 3rd drink you start compromising...and then you wake up in the morning! Now you need to face it.

* The Weight issue

She is sexy, she is pretty, she does not say no and she is about 15 sizes more then you when it is coming to fashion. The sex might be great, but you back aches will be there for years to remind you that moment when you said YES to her...when she asked you if it is ok if she sits on you.

* From the outside and underneath

Yeah, she looks amazing with that mini skirt and when you drink, you do not really get down to the bottom of the details, but the next day, just thinking about what you have been licking could make you sick.

* Act of force.

She looks great and she wants sex but she is also a very 'active' person. If you are into it, great, otherwise, you might find out that the woman of your dreams is a sado queen that wants you here and now as here little wick salve. You might find out that her meaning of sex includes cleaning the house and some other things that you do not really feel like when you are drunk.

*The sticky punch line

All went extremely well. You guys had an amazing evening, and you might even love her for that but now you will have to pay for it for the rest of your life (this is if you're in Vegas or something) as you were so drunk that you married her.

Bar advice. When they said don't drink and drive they meant it. This one they do themselves so there's no law against it.

Go dancing

Bar advice. Ladies when you go to the clubs and bars, think about having a good time and it will make for a good day even if you don't meet up with anyone nice that night. Just dressing up and going out dancing is just the sort of activity you need to loosen up and feel good. Take lessons if you have to.

FHM's Jenny McCarthy on flattery

Bar advice. Guys out there. It pays to know the right things to say to a women.Don't think you scored and that's all that matters. If you want more and want to be sure you get it again next time, learn the skill of communication. Husbands included. Your wife works hard all day as well you know.

Relationship troubles

Remember when you thought you met the mate of your dreams? You couldn't stop thinking about her/him. The sun shone more brightly. Love songs on the radio seemed like they were written just for the two of you. You loved doing things to please this person. You would sit around for hours talking about anything and laughing about the same things. Maybe at times it seemed like you knew exactly what they were thinking; you were totally in sync. Everything seemed to fit so perfectly.

But after a while the honeymoon stage seems to wear off. You might wake up one day and think, is this all there is? Have we grown apart or become different people? Maybe you have wondered if you're even in love anymore of if your mate still loves you. Maybe you have found that you have many conflicting ideas about the important things, like finances, child rearing, sex, careers and the list could go on and on.

We get so busy with our jobs, families, paying bills and all of the mundane activities of every day life. Maybe you find out the two of you were not as in sync as you might have thought. Over fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. What may have seemed like small potatoes when you first got together could have a way of becoming catastrophic and what seems to be unbearable later on.

Relationships can be very trying misunderstandings, hurt feelings, betrayal, and loneliness are things that should not be swept under the rug. It's so easy for people to say, you need to communicate with your mate. Who doesn't know that? The problem for many is, how? How do you mend all the broken fences? How do you express what's really going on inside of you? How do you get your mate to open up and share his or her feelings with you?

Bar advice.Before you throw in the towel, there are some things you should know. There are ways to learn to communicate and handle situations effectively. You may be amazed at the difference it can make in a relationship when issues are approached the right way. If you already have a great relationship, there are ways it can even be better! Remember there is a lot of ways of getting help. through books,ebooks, Internet,even doctors and counsellors. Just reading this blog may have help you already.

FHM Jenny McCarthy on Porn

Bar advice.Don't go over the top and start doing all sorts of kinky stuff and never watch it alone and get caught. Especially you guys. She's going to feel inadequate.

Break ups

So you’ve just gone through a devastating break-up. My heart goes out to you. There is nothing quite as painful as being dumped by someone you thought was it. I know you’re probably feeling like your heart has been ripped out and stomped on and that your hopes and dreams have been shattered. Do what you have to do (within reason, of course) to grieve this loss. Cry, get angry, punch your pillow, throw darts at your ex’s picture.Whatever it takes.

One thing you should not do, however, is visit, phone, email, or text you ex. You should have no contact whatsoever. Accept the fact that it is over and make a clean break. Keep your dignity intact. Trust me on this. In the long run you’ll be glad you did.

Thoughts of revenge may be going though your head, but please, don’t act on them. Don’t spread rumours, don’t betray old secrets, and don’t date or make out with his/her best friend to get even. Never resort to behaviour that you will regret in the future. Always act with class and remember that the best revenge is for your ex to see that you are doing just fine without him/her. You’ve moved on and are happy.

Keep in mind that just because someone has broken up with you, it doesn’t mean he or she no longer cares about you. It just means he/she no longer wants a relationship with you. It’s very likely that breaking up with you was just as hard on him/her as it was on you. If you take revenge, any affection that this person feels for you could turn into hatred, and any chance you may have to re-establish a relationship (even if it’s just as friends) will be shattered.

Have a pity party if you must, but do it in private. Then get off the couch, wipe those tears, and move on. It’s wise to hold off on romantic relationships for a while. Give yourself some time to heal from this relationship. Work on rebuilding your life and rekindling old friendships you might have neglected when you were in the relationship.

Bar advice.You may not realize it yet, but a new life has just opened up for you. While right now your break-up may seem negative, it really was all for the best. You have just been given another chance to find your Mr. or Ms. Right.One last thing. You never know if the two of you may just get back together again. all you needed may have been just to take two steps back in order to move forward.

Promiscuous isn't a dirty word.

Particulars of the Promiscuous is a sexual satire of panoramic proportions. Beginning with the Greeks and Romans, each chapter traces the sexual tastes and habits of hundreds of people from the notorious to the elite. It redefines the word “slut” from a promiscuous or slovenly woman to a person of either gender who is stimulated by the realities and fantasies of sexuality. From prostitutes like London’s Kitty Fisher, who was so furious to be given only half her fee (today’s equivalent of $500,000) that she baked it in a pie and ate it, to basketball great Wilt Chamberlain, who claimed to have had over 20,000 women, this book examines the humorous, eccentric, weird, and perverted sluts of history.

Bar advice. If anything you'll get a nice laugh out of this and you may find that you can understand some of your friends better next time. Maybe it will let you see inside yourself as well.

Men looking to hook up with chicks.

There are tons of reasons why women go to clubs and bars and it's not just to have fun.Do you think women just dress up in uncomfortable high heels and barely a piece of cloth covering their bosoms to have fun with their girlfriends? Here are a few types that you will find in these places and what you can do to make it easier on you get her attention.

The peacock.
She is the one who seeks your attention but has no intention of going home with you. she dresses sexily in revealing clothes and dances seductively. Once she catches you looking at her, just like a peacock, she spreads her feathers out for more attention. You'd wish she would spread her legs but no chance with this one. Undoubtedly coquettish, she has enough courage to dance alone while her less than confident friends watch. Most likely, in her small group of girlfriends, she is the one that is considered the 'wild one'.

Approachability: Your approach to the typical peacock is to first act cool. Once you both established the first eye contact, ignore her. Don't throw her another glance but you presence should be felt in a calm manner. Casually ask her girlfriend for the time or a lighter and linger around a bit. If she strikes a conversation first, you're in luck. If not, make your move after a few minutes. Don't take too long or she might move on to others.

The Va-Va Vroom
This is the one who has no problems approaching men. She will zoom in like Micheal Schumacher on ecstasy behind a race car. Just like a bloodhound, she will ask you to dance or chat up with you. Sexy, confident and carrying a lot of attitude, she is normally the one dancing on the bar tops or somewhere high above where everyone can see. Her friendly attitude applies to her ring of friends. You'll find her in a pack of equally attractive women. She's the type that will go home with you. Make you feel really great about yourself but will break your heart instantly. Trust me I know from personal experience. Then again I'm not one to complain about great sex.

Approachability:Chances are she will approach you first but for some reason if you are not on her radar, go up to her and ask her to dance. She likes confident men who shows her attention too. One key thing. Don't offer to but her drinks as other interested parties have been doing that all night. Unless she just got there then be the first.

The Gazing deer
We all grew up with Bambi and the story has taught us that deers are pretty animals. In the human version she is the one that is sincere, kind, confident, attractive and sexy in a subtle way. However, her beauty is skin deep which is evident when you mingle with her or try to have a chat. She can be bitchy if she finds you offensive and drop you in a second. She doesn't let you know she's interested but will eventually one day when she's really into you. She loves playing hard to get, basically, but she loves a gentleman. The kind who will ask her if she needs more drinks or hold her hand when she pukes it out.

Approachability: Start by complimenting her outfit or how good her hair looks. Be very subtle and make sure that she has no clue that you're tyring to pick her up.If she gets hold of that she may drop you like a stone. make friends first. She is the kind that you can bring home to mom but you'll have to work at it very hard. It may take more time and effort but the reward will be nice.

The Promiscuous.
Have you ever seen an agitated lioness prowling in the cage looking like she's premenstruating? The promiscuous type will play you like the dog she made you out to be. She is the opposite of men that 'fool around'. She might have a equally sexy boyfriend on her arm that night at the club and it attracts envy from the ladies as well as men, gay or otherwise. She is the kind that will dance with a man other than her boyfriend and not tell them she's attracted because she is deliberately stirring jealousy. Watching two guys fight it out gives her an ultimate high like a dominatrix vixen in leather admiring bevy of slaves vying for her attention under her wing.

Approachability: The only way you'll succeed is if her boyfriend leaves her alone for most of the night and she flirting with you and making eye contact(and a friend of your can vouch for that in case the boyfriend comes).Approach her only is no bigger than you or if you have a friend that can help you out if things get ugly. She has power over guys and if you go after her then be on your guard. Not recommended if you like the way your face looks right now.

Bar advice. There are so many girls out there that are all sorts of categories that are not mentioned here but approaching the them and getting what you want are not easy. Live and learn is what I say. Also, have fun while you're out there trying. Don't forget, the girls are out there looking for that special guy as well.

The problem with certain women.

One problem that guys face is the women that are with the girl that they desire but cannot get because of the dreaded 'girlfriend' that's with her. Now what I'm referring to is the one, or more, that are not as pretty, beautiful, stunning, gorgeous, etc as her but are her friends.

Most guys would have encountered a problem like this.It's bad enough to have to talk to one girl but to have to chat up another or even three more on the same table or place is really tough.The thing is that some women may want to play it safe by getting her friends involved first because this gets her going as well. She may be in search of approval of her friends, especially if she has gone through a bad time with someone else before.

Something like that is understandable but there are some backfire that these girls don't know about that I want to highlight. A lot of these 'girlfriends' are nice but the fact that they themselves cannot get a guy for themselves places them in doubt of guys intentions towards their friend that is 'hot' looking. They know they are because every where that they go together, the guys seem to go after that particular girl among all of them.

Most likely , she is the one that is sweet, stylish, confident or even just stunning. Whatever it may be she wins the guys over all the time. These girls either don't know or realize that their 'friend' or 'friends' are not doing her any good. Why? Well because they feel that if they cannot get the guy or if the guy seems to real to be true, then they try to exile him from their company. Sometimes they tell the friend that he isn't as hot. Maybe they say that they 'heard' something about him(this of course isn't true) and just basically put him in a bad light.

The natural human behavior like this is normal among women but I have seen women that don't bother what their friends do or say about that person and follow their instincts and heart. Why is this? Well, they have seen, heard and felt the sorrowful state of their friends and understands their plight as women as well. She may have ben screwed by them before as well. Thus, she knows that it is what her friends have done to her in the past and she has lost out before. Nevertheless, she will allow the guy to pursue her and exclude the 'advice' of her friends. A women should know what she wants and not let anyone tell her what she wants.

In some situations in the bars that I have been in, I have seen this sort of thing happen. To be absolutely blunt these women are normally the over weight, unattractive, weird looking, unstylish, non confident, shy, arrogant, abused or just plain lesbian (but thay won't say it out loud). They want to have their friend be with them and if a guy comes into the picture then the fear of loosing that friend and not having the same routine seems devastating to them. They feel that they may be loosing out on the best thing that has happened to them with a friend that looks good. Why?

The friend that looks good is an attraction to their group. She brings the boys around.They know it but the main girl is 'blind' to this fact. She really thinks that they are looking after her. In fact they, at times, use her to be the nectar to attract the guys over. They know that he will be interested in their friend; so what do they get? Well, they do the main thing as described earlier, that is to make a bad impression about that guy. Also, and the main thing, is the hope that he will find interest in them if he cannot get her. Basically she becomes the bait for other guys for her 'friends'. Sometimes it may be that he may have friends that are looking for girls but are not as attractive as well. It's a long list of factors.

Bar advice. Those of you that have done this or those of you that have experienced this...all I can say is you know who you are. Please don't be upset with this write up but think about it. A lot is TRUE.Make a change for the better and live with the fact that who you are is who you are. makre the best of what you got. Lot's of people don't know that some are the most attractive people are the most lonely.

FHM(Jenny McCarthy) talks on Food and Sex

Bar advice.Guys some of us don't have to follow all the advice but "hey" learning new stuff can actually help if the need ever came up so watch and learn.

FHM ( Jenny McCarthy) on dressing for men

Bar advice.This ones really for the guys. If you had her as your personal guide, you'd look sharp too.

More flirting secrets

Learn how to spice up the game of love and intrigue everyone you meet by finding and flaunting your most bewitching self. Sharpen up your flirting skills by discovering:

* 25 ways to be a great flirt
* how to create an alluring first impression
* how to overcome the fear of flirting
* how to flirt anywhere, at parties, on the job, while traveling, on the phone, in the car, at the health club
* how to dress fetchingly
* where to go, what to do, and with whom to flirt
* and many more tantalizing secrets

Bar advice.Whether you're a shy beginner or an advanced coquette or Casanova, these perfected flirting tips and secrets will soon have you charming the socks off everyone.

How to meet women tonight

You go out with some buddies for a night on the town, hoping to meet a girl to have some fun with. You head to a bar, get a table, and order drinks. The place is alive, and you and your buddies are having a good time looking at all the pretty girls except nobody is meeting any them. You want to talk to them, but you feel more comfortable sitting around with your friends talking about how you would like to go home with a girl that night. Instead, you all end up leaving the same way you came in.Together.

This is a pretty common occurrence among the lovelorn bachelor. This is a symptom of what I like to call the "comfort zone". Basically, everyone has a comfort zone. This is a state of mind where people are surrounded by that which is familiar.Familiarity breeds complacency, which can keep you from taking the action necessary to achieve your goals, because that action introduces uncertainty into your life. This is something the comfort zone likes to keep at bay.

So when you want to meet a woman, you need to know how to break out of this comfort zone.How do you do this? The answer is self-evident. You must learn to meet women by yourself.

Friends can be a great asset, but most of the time, going out with friends actually hinders one's ability to meet women. Not just because of the comfort zone factor, but because other guys who don't know what they're doing with girls can actually ruin the interactions you have with them. Be it by jealousy or ineptitude.

So the best way to counter this is to leave your friends behind. This doesn't have to be permanant but only when you are on the prowl for girl.But the prospect of going out by oneself can strike fear into the hearts of men. After all, doesn't going out by yourself signal to everyone that you're a loser with no friends? Doesn't it make you look creepy? The answer to both these questions is:NO!!!!!

The simple act of going out on your own can shake your comfort zone, because you have no anchors to keep you there. Often your friends will act as an anchor to your comfort zone that keep you from approaching women. And it is easier to break out of this comfort zone without those anchors present. Plus, you don't have to worry about failing with women and being judged by your friends if they're not around.

But the most powerful thing about going out by yourself is that it puts your focus on what you are doing. This means that every interaction you have is without distraction, so it is more easily examined and the problems you had are more easily identified. This allows you to spot your sticking points more quickly and correct them.

Not only that, but being out by yourself gives you the freedom of flexibility when it comes to where you're going and who you talk to. If you're bored with a place, you can leave and go to another one. If you want to talk to a girl who your friends might poke fun at you for, you can. Not only this, but you're free to mess up the interactions you have, because chances are, no one there will ever see you again, so you don't have to worry about what others think of you.

But like all things, knowing what to say will help you to go out by yourself and succeed at increasing your ability to approach. There are many examples of Openers to say in the book 'The Art of Attraction'by Joseph Matthews but some guys will need to know how to handle the inevitable question "Where are your friends?"

Something I've used to great effect is the answer "Oh, they're around." This simple dismissive statement not only answers the question, but as far as anyone knows, you're telling the truth. If you want to take it a step further, I've even used this as an Opener at times I've been out by myself. The "My Friends Ditched Me" Opener.
This works good whenever you're out somewhere by yourself. Basically, you approach your target or a group, and say "Do you guys have any friends who got split up by someone they both liked?"

Using this, you set the stage that you're out by yourself because, well, unlike your friends, you're not lame! Not only that, you throw in a nice Drama Opener in there to engage the group. And if you're still too shy to go out by yourself, then try this little trick.When you go out with your friends, ditch them. Go off on your own and leave them behind for a while, then meet up with them later. This can be quite an effective method if your friends don't mind you leaving!

If you don't know what a Drama Opener is, check it out in the book 'The Art of Approaching'. It's got TONS of openers and other things to say so that you never have to worry about how you're going to meet women again. If you're one of those guys who gets tounge-tied around beautiful girls, or if your mind likes to "blank" out on you, then you definitely need to check out the book right now.


Bar advice.Once you learn the secrets unleash in the book, you'll know how to meet any woman, any time, anywhere you may be.Whether you're alone or not!

Cloud talk

Bar advice. Things that are worth while and some that are idiotic. The meaning of life is ???

Foamy- Dating advice

Bar advice. I couldn't have said it any better.

Do you need visual romance

This is a pretty amazing movie, that does get graphic in nature and crosses the line in parts of what is art and what is not. Very good story in which Caroline Ducey goes out looking for love when her boyfriend, Sagamore Stevenin refuses to pay any attention to her. Caroline's character finds love in many different forms, men and means. From picking up a lover at a bar (Rocco Siffredi), to finding an older man into S&M, to having a quickie on a set of stairs by a total stranger (which I think is the best segment). A great film from Catherine Breillat.


Bar advice. This is what romance can be like. No boundaries, age or uncertanties. We all have them. We are , after all, human.

Ahhhh! Romance

Everyone knows that part of dating is romance, maybe I am easy to please, but I think I have known some pretty romantic women in my day. I would love to hear about some of your most romantic experiences.

There are so many romantic memories, many more, but the memories have faded over time. There are some memories that will never fade; one in particular. I think that the most romantic thing that anyone has ever done for me was when a particular someone did a very special thing for me. She made me a meal while I was sleeping. The thing was it wasn't just the meal. We were working the night before at the bar and only went to bed at about 4.30pm that morning and the next day was Sunday ( we don't work on that day) but she got up to go to go to the market and buy the food to make the meal. The romance was what she did and not what she cooked for me. In fact, I can't even remember what we ate. It doesn't really matter because what's important is that I remember what she did. My heart melts when I think back at those things and when I see her smile.

Bar advice.The most romantic things are the little things, things that have a shared meaning, things that are intimate, and personal. Those are the memories that shine the brightest, and I will cherish them forever; maybe I am just easy to please, or just maybe I recognize what truly comes from the heart.

Just became No1

Bar Advice. The advice is in the lyrics.

Men are 'Dogs'

As dogs today are still pack animals, with the same instincts as "a pack of wolves," it’s important for dog owners to behave like the "Alpha", or leader, of the group. In the wild, dogs would follow a structure, and in the absence of a solid "alpha" leader, the "beta’s" and "omega’s" of the pack would rebel. So as a dog owner, if you don’t make it clear to the dog that YOU are the leader–by eating first, going through doorways first, etc.–it’s all over from there: these wolf-like creatures are going to do the complete opposite of what you tell them to, and even become aggressive and untamed.Sounds kind of like what happens if you let girls run all over you, doesn’t it?

If you are firm and consistent in asserting yourself as the Alpha of your dog’s "pack" (ie, the family household), he will respect you and do what he or she is told. You’ll avoid so many problems, just by taking the time to show a dog that you are the boss.This of course has to be in a loving and caring manner as well because, much like women, dogs want someone who’s in control. They don’t wan’t to take up the role of leader themselves. They’ll actually love you more when you walk around with pride and confidence.

There’s more we can apply to female attraction from alpha dog training. When a low-ranking dog rebels against the "top dog," successful dog trainers do the same things alpha wolves do in the wild. They ignore the dog for a couple days, until it comes back apologetic and willing to do what it is told. If the dog acts well upon return, he is rewarded and given the socialization and attention he needs.As you’ll learn below, you can use this same principles towards ladies you meet at a bar or club.

Of course, you can’t go overboard. A dog that obeys out of fear does not behave as well as a dog who behaves out of respect. In fact, it’s been found that being too assertive and physical with a dog will only lead to aggressive and reckless behaviors. So it pays to be firm, but not brutal. Just like with the ladies. You want to be confident and assertive, but not arrogant and mean. It will get you nothing. Women don't like that sort of behaviour.

Here are some more benefits to carrying "alpha attitude" around the ladies:

By asserting yourself as the leader,someone to be respected not feared,you gain people’s respect. As I said, females don’t want to have to adopt male leadership themselves; they just want to be around someone who’s not afraid to be a stand-up, assertive kind of man. But let me be clear, women don’t want an insecure guy who feels he has to act macho and sexist to get his buddies’ approval. Like so many jocks, a guy who naturally acts confident, and expects people to show him respect. That’s what you’re aiming for, and that’s what women who are worth your time want.

Conversely, by being the "follower" instead of the "followed," people, especially girls, will treat you as what you present. Someone who’s not a leader, someone who’s not confident, tough, and full of power; in short, someone who’s not full of value. You get what you give, so it’s up to you to give a lot! The rewards will speak for itself.

When a girl, particularly one you’ve just met at a bar or any social venue, treats you with disrespect, it’s up to you, as the "alpha male," to ignore her. Shut her out, move on, and she’ll eventually come back to you the same way a dog would, with her tail between her legs, apologetic, and hungry for your respect. But don’t address her until you’re sure you have her respect, otherwise you’re allowing her to "move up the pack," which, as with dogs, will only create future problems.This actually goes to show why guys who ignore girls, get more than those who dote on them and act needy. It’s all evolutionary.There is , however, the exception of some that are bitches and will never come back. With that in mind, who needs those. it's good to have found that out early.

Conversely, when a girl treats you well, gives you love, and yes, does as she’s told (though I’m not suggesting you guys bark out commands!), you must treat her with respect. This especially applies to girlfriends, but also a girl you’ve only known or dated shortly. Show your thanks, show your appreciation, the same way an alpha leader would display love and affection upon a well-behaved canine.

You can even apply the alpha dog training to dates. These things must be done from time to time.You must decide where to eat on a date (don’t let her choose the restaurant!), you musn’t be afraid to eat first (although social conventions do dictate that we must wait for both our plates to be served!), and you should get the choice of wine.The girl will actually respect you for it, much more so than if you bashfully gave up the choices to her. Again, retain your position as the "top dog."

Finally, you have to show that you’re an alpha not just one-on-one, but also in groups. An alpha wolf doesn’t gain his position by submitting to others in the pack.He asserts himself in front of others and makes it known that he’s the leader. That doesn’t mean you treat your buddies and strangers like crap. It just means you don’t let them push you around. In short, you must be what the guy I think has the whole "alpha attitude" down pat, Carlos Xuma, calls "being a stand-up guy." That means standing up for yourself and standing up for your girl, by not taking crap from anyone. You don’t have to be a jock to let people know they can’t push you around.

Quite the contrary. Xuma knows that in order to be big, you’ve gotta think big, and he does this himself by adopting alpha characteristics. What are some great alpha characteristics? In his 'Secrets to Becoming the Alpha Man' course, Xuma rattles off a number of them, including being:

Clever.Smart.Cunning.Ambitious.Excited.Honorable.Dominant(not aggressive, but demonstrating superior social skills).Stable.Fit(healthy lifestyle)Curious.Balanced.Natural

Doesn’t sound like you? No worries.Just dig deep within yourself and get that Alpha male out in the open. Watch other guys or learn from books, ebooks or videos to get that essence of alpha attitude. I know some of the things here sounds out of character for you but there are times when this needs to be done.

Bar advice. It pays to be alpha. The best part is, you don’t have to be a player to do it. The lasting reward is feeling good about yourself, and getting the girls all the other alpha males get. What’s wrong with that? When you got her you will become the Alpha and Omega(the first and the last) in her life.Woof!