Cofidence for you ladies. Know it now.

Remember Teri Hatcher doing those impossible splits right on the studio floor on Oprah's show? Sheer confidence! Maybe Carmen Electra positively gushing about what exotic dance has done for her body and bedroom tactics? A large number of celebrities have recently taken to a sexy alternative to working out. From pole vaulting they have leapt straight to pole dancing at the X Factor and they aren’t stopping at pole-dancing either. Our celebrity pin-up girls have been everywhere and done everything, from Strip-Aerobics to Exotic Dance Workouts, the motto is ‘Everything sexy goes’!

If all this sudden gush for sex is making you blush, you go ahead and click your tongue and hang your head in shame, no one will begrudge you. “SEX SELLS” and we are being sold it morning, noon and night through every possible channel. It screams at you from gigantic billboards featuring gorgeous demi-love-gods, pierces into your fantasy’s through the television and fondles your imagination with semi-naked bodies scattered all over the net. Life itself is like one giant, prolonged orgasm and as a woman you are expected to idolize those models and endeavor to look like one.

Sure you wanna be Carrie from ‘Sex and the City’ and moan and groan and roll around on your bed with a different guy every night, seven nights a week turning your life into a series of fantastic sexual escapade but you'll snap out of it. After all life is not a TV show and learning how to embrace your sexuality takes time and effort.

First impressions are important. Amongst the glamour of the TV shows and the supposed sexual abandonment, the skin and the G-Strings, women have to deal with mixed messages, guilt trips, religious dogma, body image, and misinformation. Sure getting your hymen snapped by 16 is a must, but so is regretting doing it by 25. Beneath all our external frills, getting laid is an issue women deal with badly.

The concept of‘Positive Sex is an idea not many of us have managed to fathom yet. Fornication is still, essentially a male domain, where women participate like whimpering goats, hesitating and interestingly enough feeling insecure about their role in it all. In general cases.

A majority of women swear by making love in the dark. Here's what I KNOW, most of us are ashamed of our body. Nudity is a concept we haven't been taught to handle well. Seeing ourselves naked freaks us out, and knowing that someone else is watching us naked, desiring our body for itself, brings to life our worst fears. This is the gaze our parents warned us against, this is what religious lessons have told us to avoid. So off goes the light, plunging everything, from ourselves, to that desirous gaze, to our insecurities, into comforting darkness.

The truth is that the darkness serves as a warm invitation to what Susan Bremer calls our ''Shadow”side. ‘'Every woman wants to take a trip to their wild side” she explains,‘We all yearn to seduce. But we've been told over and over again that to rejoice in our body is immoral, yet the wish to feel powerful in our sensuality, to express our sexuality remains.” Jane(a girl I know), a proud ‘Gentleman club’ dancer considers her sexual prowess to be her way of establishing her role in a world hounded by men.

This sense of power probably needs some delving into. As women suffer from their own insecurities. It’s a cliche by now but they all know that the world belongs to the testosterone thugs. They keep women down everywhere, be it in the boardroom or wherever. Slowly women grow use to being kept down, such that they soon become conditioned to not reversing the situation at all.

A positive sex-image, whether you use it or not, can and will alter all this most miraculously. Your sexual achievements in the bedroom can give you the kind of omnipotent confidence which oozes out from your personal to public sphere. For any woman with low self-esteem, the act of embracing your sexuality serves as a miracle tool for believing that she can have that effect on other people, in a non-sexual environment too.

The thing is, much as we try to shake it off, we are all sexual beings. Sex is important to us and it has the power to make us feel good. 65% of women in most countries do not, at their heart of hearts, take this idea seriously. Good sex or an attempt to have good sex, for them, is still a nudge-nudge-whisper-whisper issue. This attitude gets transferred from them to their kids and grand kids and so on, such that each generation of these young women grow up with the idea that every time they are making love they ought to feel guilty about it. This mystifying of the subject is harmful for a lot of reasons.

For starters it gives us a lifelong baggage of guilt, every time we think about sex. Every time we fantasize or our hands itch to masturbate we feel like a criminal. The constant feeling that sex is wrong or dirty leads to a negative self-image as a person. That misinformation means that when we are in the act it can be hard to enjoy it, leading to severe sexual frustration, not a feeling you'd like to carry around with you.
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Ladies this discussion might go on and on, because of the trouble to face the fact that we like getting laid. All this has a very easy solution. Get in to your sexiest lacy underwear, devote tonight to unleashing the temptress in you and for once really, really enjoy it without any hang-ups.

Bar advice.You will like the results tomorrow morning.Of course pick the man you really want.

Getting underware for her

Lets face it, we men are obsessed with women’s bodies and yet if I needed to tell the size of her breasts the best I could probably muster would be “just about right” and if she were to ask me right now what her breast size was I would probably mutter that it didn’t make her bum look big at all. This is in part due to my ever-present attempt to gain brownie points and not spend the night sleeping in the kitchen with the dog, but it is in one big part due to ignorance as most guys simply don't know.

Of course what I'm about to suggest is for people who are either married, live together or are consenting adults who see each other in or out of their underwear. Please don't go ransacking through a girls drawers if you don't know her intimately or she might just think you're some sort of pervert.



It really isn’t that difficult to find lingerie size information either and the list of instructions on how to find out would consist solely of:

1 – Open cupboard door.
2 – Remove appropriate garment.
3 – Check label and make mental note of size.

Even my brain could cope with that first thing in the morning but despite telling myself I should do it I never actually remember to. This could partially be because there is something instilled in the back of my brain that tells me the second I remove her bra and start ferreting around inside it, her mother is bound to burst down the front door unannounced and catch me in the act of apparently sniffing her beloved daughter’s bra. This really isn’t a situation I want to find myself in but if I want to please her (my partner, not her mother) then I should do it. In fact, every man should do it. Go to your wife or girlfriend’s closet and find out her bra size. Write it on a piece of paper and stick it in your wallet if necessary.

Of course, even if you know the size of her bra that doesn’t make the actual selection any easier. As a general rule of thumb, I’m led to believe that a black latex nurse’s outfit is not considered to be either lingerie or indeed comfortable so I will try to steer clear of that as far as possible, no matter how appealing they look. I would try my utmost to ensure that whatever I buy will not only please me but will make my partner feel sexy as well. This should imply that she will be able to move comfortably and bits don’t poke out when she lifts an arm or tries to sit down, or more importantly lie down.

Visiting any shop that has lingerie is bound to be a big deal the first time you try it but you're a grown man and should be able to cope. The sales assistant probably won’t think that the stuff you buy is for yourself unless you say something embarrassingly stupid and wear fake breasts. In fact, there’s a very good chance she’s dealt with people like you on a fairly regular basis. You know, the kind of person who skulks around by the knickers looking around shiftily and sweating a lot. In fact, come to think of it, it’s probably best if you don’t do that, and just head straight over to her instead. She will probably be very helpful.


Once you get it for her you probably can't wait to finally see her wearing the new lingerie you bought.So, I guess the only thing that's left to do now is actually find out her size and really go and buy something appropriate and NO latex nurse's outfit that you've seen in some porn movie even though that's what most guys perceive women like.

Bar advice. Even if you get it wrong. She will appreciate it with a smile on her face.

Successful dating

Dating is probably one of the most exciting yet daunting adventures any single individual might ever encounter. Traditional dating cum meeting up, going out or eating out with somebody you are interested with can be a challenge as well as a learning experience for everyone.

More than women, men feel more pressured when going out on a date because they are expected to do almost everything to make the date a success. Since they are the ones who will carry out most of the so called “dating tasks” here are some tips that can help men go through with the exciting process of dating the girl they are interested in.

Dating can be a nightmare especially for men who haven’t dated for a long time, for those who haven’t been successful with women and even for those guys who are so used to dating without knowing the basic rules in playing the game. Remember, people need to conform with the "rules" whether they like it or not. In the case of dating, there are simple rules that need to be followed to ensure success.

Ensure cleanliness by keeping on eye on your hygiene and style. The worst thing any man can do is to turn up on a date smelling, unshaven, and looking dirty so the first thing you should do is to take a bath, brush your teeth, and shave those stubborn stubble's. Men who do not know how to maintain hygiene are no-nos for girls into more hygienic sex. Remember, women think  about these things. It also pays to spray on some decent cologne and gargle before you meet up with your date.

Dress up to look your best. Looking your best when you go out on a date gives the idea that you have prepared for the special occasion even if it’s only a first date. If you don’t have enough dough to buy new shoes or clothes, at least try to wear those decent ones to impress your date.

Be on time. The first impression of women is usually based on how much men value their time. If you ask a woman on a date, make sure that you can turn up on time because not doing so will give her the impression that you don’t value your word or her, for that matter. If you don’t want your date to think you are unreliable, try be early or at least on time when going out on a date.

Before asking someone out, make sure you have a job to flaunt. Women always find security in men who are secured themselves. Although financial stability is too early to discuss, your current job will give her an idea if you can manage dating her for a long time. Men who have jobs give women the impression that they are ambitious and they have the will to go on top.However, if you really don't have one, never lie.

Do all the necessary preparations. Preparing for things you can say during the date will ensure the easy flow of conversation all throughout the night. Getting your knowledge levels up and sharing it with your date will definitely make her date interesting. The safest topic to discuss includes current events so make sure you watch the news or read quality magazines. Know when to stop talking and start listening. Opening up topics for a conversation will pave the way for an interesting intellectual stimulation but you must know when the ice has been broken and when to be patient. After you have given your thoughts on a certain topic, ask her what she thinks and listen to her intently.

Issues on bills. The general rule in dating is that whoever asks for that date should pay for it. Since you are the one who asked, and you are the man, then; by all means you should pay the bill. But if the idea of your paying for the entire bill does not sit well with the woman you’re dating and she insists on paying for her half, make a compromise. Suggest that she pays the half and you’ll pay for the rest. This takes pressure off her as she feels that she's not pushed into another date if she doesn't like you. Women want empowerment as well.

Being a gentleman pays. Simple things that show your gentleness like holding the door open for her, letting her walk through the door first and pulling out a chair for her will definitely make an impact on her. Showering her compliments now and than throughout the day will also make her think that you appreciate her efforts of looking good for the date. Don't over do it though.

Watch out for body language. Just before the date ends watch her body language before attempting to kiss her goodnight or trying to seduce her. Attempting sex on a first date is not a good thing unless she wants to. Lastly, don’t tell her that you’ll call her if you don’t have plans of doing so.

If you are serious in the woman you’re dating, start learning how to live a healthy life. Smoking only show irresponsibility and carelessness because you are not taking care of your health. Drinking should be a social practice when going out and not a daily affair. Think of new ways to entice her where possible.

Bar advice. Just remember to always be yourself. If you try to be someone else and don't know what you're talking about don't get caught with your pants down. Also, she may know more about the subject and the whole date will be screwed. She will never go out with you again.

Not forgetting the women: Lingerie

The word exotic refers to something exclusive, strange and extremely beautiful. Hence, when it comes to lingerie, the term exotic lingerie refers to the most unique choice, under the category of lingerie.

Most women usually look out for the best and something chic when it comes to purchasing lingerie. The desire to purchase exotic lingerie is common, in almost all women, across the globe from an early period. As per some of the famous psychologists, the desire for exotic lingerie indicates that you are adventurous and would definitely love to indulge in the act of fantasy. Please remember that not all women can really afford this luxury. If you are were born in one of the worlds poorest countries then you can be forgiven for not being able to afford it. In these places they are simply referred to as underwear or undergarments.

There are different types of exotic lingerie available in the marketplace for you these days. Some cost less but some need that extra amount of money. It depends on the style you prefer and the kind of stuff you would feel comfortable adorning. In case, you are looking for something chic to wear, you can go for leather exotic lingerie. However, if you are looking for something feminine and that would flaunt your curves, you must consider lacy and satin ones.

For the sexy women who love experimenting with their style, sensual thongs are the best to shop. Shopping online would be the best option for you. Try visiting some of the best websites based on exotic lingerie and you would definitely find something that compliments your style and figure. Never wear underwear that's uncomfortable!

You would be amazed to find the variety and styles available, under the category of "exotic lingerie online".The best part is that you can shop for your favorite exotic lingerie, within the privacy of your home. Additionally you can get amazing discounts on when shopping online. You must also take special care of the exotic lingerie, you purchase. This would offer long life to it.





 Wearing it today and you would definitely be able to lure your man. All you have to do is to look out for your favorite lacy stuff, wear it and flaunt it. This would make your guy fall in love with you, all over, again. Let me tell you that most of the "working women of the night" spend tons of cash on these itmes because they know that it turns the guys on...big time.

Bar advice. Why am I writing this is because, trust me, some of you out there really need the help. Been there, seen it. Aughhhh!

Meeting girls online

Lots of men often ask me if meeting women at the clubs or in public places isn’t gradually becoming obsolete in today’s modern society with the growing popularity of the Internet? My answer to that is: Has driving become obsolete since the growing popularity of aviation?

The truth is that the Internet serves it purpose to a certain degree. Is there really any method that you can compare which can have you meeting women from as close as the girl next door or as far as all four corners of the globe and all with a single click? Probably not. But just like everything else, the Internet as a method for meeting women has its advantages and disadvantages.

Firstly, there is no comparison to seeing a woman in the flesh who you admire and plotting the course to meeting her and ultimately becoming a part of her life. Of course this too can be done on the Internet; but one big difference. On the Internet, the woman is virtual. Over the past few months I have taken a look at a few of the sites out there which have crept up to fill this void which introduce men and women to each other and all the ones which I have seen all seem to serve their purpose to some effect. As a matter of fact, I have known people who have met their perfect matches on some of these sites and have even gone on to do the ultimate.

On the other hand I am all too familiar with people who have come away from the Internet experience so beaten, broke, frustrated and battered because they have been disappointed, disillusioned and let down, by such things as the photo collectors those e-women who only collect photographs of people they “meet” on the net or those women who supply fake photographs that bear no resemblance to who they actually look like. Then there are those who like Miss Haversham from the old novel “Great Expectations” having been spurned and burned by relationships in the past they set out to trawl the net causing as much pain as possible to every man whom she happens to come across - and the Internet is full of these women.

In this age of political correctness and women’s liberation these women are more than likely wreaking vengeance on the spineless men of the net as vengeance for the absence of men approaching them. I have come to verify that experiences on the Internet aren’t too different for the women either. However, there’s one caveat for the fairer sex. The men that these ladies hope to and do attract are so desperate for attention and anything else on offer that they are willing to jump through every hoop which the women put in front of them so that they can have the chance to be with these women - and these hoops are in no short supply. Take this one for example, (and you need not be in Asia) asianfrindfinder. It may or may not be what you are after but it won't hurt to look.

These men are willing to pander (virtually and really) to these women’s’ every need, and numerous net-women have to practically fight these characters off with a stick. Some examples of this are like telling them such things as the kind of things they should do in the photographs and the style of photo that they should supply in order to obtain “special consideration.” Even though the ones that they themselves have on show are often generic. As well as cross-examining these men like a prosecutor to an accused – all to eventually declare a mistrial. For this, special consideration, these men are rewarded by the women in due course neither showing up for meetings, nor returning email and calls and similar things, and maybe some verbal abuse, if they are lucky.

Some of the women seem like the perfect person who you really would want to meet and introduce to mother but then you realize that you have been more or less automatically eliminated as soon you read the profile. Now that’s honesty but then what are you supposed to do? Run away with your tail between your legs or stick around, call the bluff, face the challenge and try to convince her otherwise? Let's suppose you do and in the most unlikely event convince her, what about the fundamental point that never would have worked in the first place. Then there are the ones that you never hear from and those that are the high-quality ones. I know a friend of mine whose phone was always ringing off the hook with calls from these women but he met few of them and has never got past first base as he would wish with any of them. We figured out it was because he was giving these women too much “special consideration” on his web space and profile. After he ceased that desperate practice it all started to change.

Look, the Internet can be and is a fun place to meet women, and it seems like this will remain so for quite some time, however it is helpful not to take the women who you meet there too seriously, that is until you personally get to know them. Try friendfinder. This helps in any part of the world where you can meet women. Additionally the odds are and can be stacked in your favor away from the offline modem if done right.

Bar advice. One thing that men must remember is that on the Internet it is easy for any man to “approach” any woman and tell her anything. But it takes a special man to actually approach a woman in person.

Meeting women in bars and on the street

So you want to know how to meet girls in areas with plenty of them. Here are the situations First: The bars and clubs where the music is so loud, where there are too many people with little or no space to move, and the girls are dancing with themselves,. The main idea is that it is very hard and almost pointless to start a conversation in these areas. How do I do it?

Second: How do I meet girls who are walking along the street maybe going somewhere. Like on their way to work or shopping or somewhere else. The point is how do people do this to with women. But here, its almost considered weird because you pop out of nowhere and she's not expecting it.

Finally, what do you do when a girl tells you she has a boyfriend? Should you leave her alone or continue your business of getting her? What if she is totally in love with her boyfriend, how do you win her over?

Okay, first, bars and clubs are very difficult venues. Unless you're specially suited to the party style nightlife, these venues will be a bit daunting and even if you are predisposed to this type of pick up, you will still have to deal with lots of competition from other men. That said, it's not impossible to meet women in nightclubs. But it will require you to be a little more outgoing and aggressive than other venues.Unless she's a working girl then there's no problem except the money as price.

Here's stuff that you can do. When you're in a club, you tend to like to hang out in open-air areas where you can talk to other people easier. Patios that are right outside the club can be good for this. Most clubs will have some form of outdoor area where you can hang out especially places like New York and Los Angeles and even Singapore (Starting in July 2007) where you're not allowed to smoke inside. The dance floor can also be quite effective. If you like to dance, go out there and try dancing with the women who are dancing by themselves. If they're not into it, move on. If they are then it's play time! Also, keep in mind the time at which you're going to the club. Usually, the later it gets, the easier it is to pick up a girl (this is because as it gets later, people are more predisposed to "hook up" due to alcohol, desperation, boredom, etc.) so think about that.

Second, to approach women on the street takes a bit of finesse. People do tend to be a bit more private than in many parts of the world. My best advice in this respect is to actually follow the girl for a bit and see where she's going. If she stops off at a coffee shop or a bus stop, or whatever, that is the time to approach her! If it looks like she's going someplace you can't follow her into (like her home or office for instance) then you'll have to take the chance and try approaching her cold. But make it a quick approach and include a time constraint ("I know you're on your way somewhere, this will only take a second..."), get her number as quick as you can, then move on.

Finally, when it comes to the "boyfriend" thing, that's a matter of personal taste. Some guys don't want to mess with that, others don't care. The thing is, most women aren't that committed to their boyfriends, so it's not as big of an obstacle as you might think.The important thing to do in this situation is to try and "read" the woman. Sometimes, a girl will tell you she has a boyfriend when she really doesn't because she wants to politely reject you (and sometimes she really does have a boyfriend and wants to stay faithful to him). If this is the case, you have to look at the signals she's giving you to see if she's actually into you or not. If a woman does like you and is in fact into you, she will usually withhold the fact that she has a boyfriend. And if she does bring it up, she wants you to take the lead and "sweep her off her feet" so she won't have to feel guilty about cheating on him. So when that's the case, it's time to pump up the aggressiveness on your pick up.

Bar advice. If you learn how to read a woman properly then you'll get somewhere. Don't fear rejection to the point that you'll become the oldest bachelor among your friends. If you need help then I suggest you get some help from books or ebooks on the subject

First impressions

Always look your best. I know this sounds really obvious but you'd be surprised by how many men don't understand the importance of this simple tip. You never know when the girl of your dreams will turn up, or where. And it’s become a bit of a cliché because it’s true. First impressions really do count. Here are some figures to consider from my bar observations.

If you make a Good first impression on a woman, you have a 90% chance of ever getting with her at that point (10% of women for whatever reason will be unreachable for most men at any point – she might like women herself etc). If you make a bad first impression your chances with her reduce drastically to just 20%. This means that to make her attracted to you after the first 3 minutes of meeting her will be incredibly difficult if her first impressions of you were bad. It’s the difference between climbing a mountain and using a helicopter to fly up one. Good first impressions means you’re on your way to the top in the helicopter, bad first impressions means you have a difficult climb to success. No helicopters for you? Honestly, I can't stress this enough - always try to look your best.

Here 5 S’s of first impressions. Shave. Shower. Style. Smell. Shoes. Remember these 5 S’s and always take care of them before you go out. Why are shoes the number 5 S? Your shoes are the first thing a woman really notices about your clothing and hence your appearance. Make sure your shoes are clean and fashionable. What you wear is very important. I could try to recommend a certain look but as with all things fashionable by the time you read this it may have changed. Get the latest FHM magazine or other fashionable man's magazine's and imitate the styles you see there. Most women don't really care what labels you are wearing as long as you look good so you don't have to spend too much money on clothing.

Many guys that dress better usually comment on how strange they feel wearing clothes they are uncomfortable in, but nine times out of 10 they start to feel natural and even confident wearing their new wardrobe within days. Make sure you smell good. Again this is extremely important. Remember how you feel when a woman walks by you and she smells so good - you feel an instant attraction even though you don't know her - well, that's how women feel too. Wear a good quality cologne, but don't spray too much. One squirt on both sides of the neck, and one squirt on both wrists - maximum. You don't want to smell too overpowering. I recommend Cool Water by Davidoff or John Paul Gautier for Men (often called JPG love juice because women love it) if they don’t sell it where you are try to order some from abroad, this stuff is great!

By the time you have slowly evolved from your old self to the new one I recommend that you go to a bar decked out in your new outfit and shoes, hair combed and smelling nice, and sit at the bar counter and order a drink. Small piece of advice- sit near the toilets because the girls will need to use them as well. Once some sort of eye contact has been made she will make that trip to the loo just so she can pass you. It's a good thing you're wearing some great smelling cologne huh? This may even be a conversational piece for here. Hopefully she might ask you what sort it is and that's your chance to connect with her and try to at least get her number.

Bar advice. You will like the new you once the chicks are throwing themselves at you. Sir Winston Churchill once said " Clothes make the man".

Working during the new year

It seems that everyone is hit with the bug of new year blues. What's that? Well it's the fact that we were on a party high during the Christmas and New Year holidays, that we don't want to step into the work place.

Some haven't returned to work as yet but they know the moment they step into the office they want to make a U turn out of there and head straight to the pubs. In my case the Roof Bar. January brings all the expats and tourist back from the US,UK, Europe and even some parts of Asia that are freezing still. The weather is really gone mad nowadays but all the more so for us to dive straight into work. Some of the people that have returned to work have headed straight to the nightspots to catch up with others. They still have that feel of having to neglect that the new year has arrived and just want to party a little more. Who can blame them?

Lots of them will also go see or find the working girls in the bars because they haven't seen them for a while and that gives them more of an opportunity to have another good drinking night. Of course there's the fact that the girls will be willing participants to follow the guys for even less cash because they just started the year and are in need of cash themselves. Both side will benefit from the situation and it looks like the party is set to continue. I have seen this happen year after year. One small problem that happens sometimes is that some of the guys come back after the holidays and tell me that their marriage is on the verge of divorce. Sometimes these things happen, whereby the wife is not too happy that the spouse is so far away and too long away as well.

When these guys have been out in this part of the world for this long and find the difference in the Asian girl, they look disappointed to actually return home. It's not good as children are sometimes involved in the whole mess and that's a little unfair for them. Some fellow that I know have actually married girls from this region and are really happy and sometimes don't even want to go back. The fact that they have family back at which ever country that they came from compels them to return due to those family ties. The weather is what the dread the most.

Bar adice. Look inside and keep true to yourself and family. Never make rash decisions and remember what are most important in your life.