Bar Advice. For the guys it's not that easy but, yes, it's pretty much that simple. For the chicks, see why guys just don't get it.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
How to make a woman happy?
There many things that we can do to make a woman happy. It's complicated yet ever so easy. Here's a little couple of notes to remember. Take your time and read through it slowly and carfully. Help your relationship a little with some understanding.
Bar Advice. For the guys it's not that easy but, yes, it's pretty much that simple. For the chicks, see why guys just don't get it.
Bar Advice. For the guys it's not that easy but, yes, it's pretty much that simple. For the chicks, see why guys just don't get it.
Kissing a woman
IT is an experience that most people would remember. Their first French kiss. Some people would say it was a great experience while some would prefer not to mention it. A lot of us, it happened too fast, we forgot what happened even because we were too excited in the moment. Of course some of us were too young or didn't realize we were even doing it right. One thing we all know is that French kissing is a very delicate and sensual experience.
Research shows women's lips are one of their erogenous zone, so it's important for men to leave a lasting impression with women. If you French kiss her like no one else, you'll most likely to kiss something else of her next. know what I mean? The skill of kissing does not simply consist of knowing how to move your tongue inside a woman's mouth without hitting her tonsils. It involves the entire mouth. The lips, tongue, cheeks and the rest of the body.
Give the lady a hand. Position your hands on her body while kissing her. Hold her face, chhek area, firmly but gently as you slip your tongue inside her mouth and suck on her lips. This will definitely make her toes curl. Also, try to gently pull her hair back from the back or slightly squeezing the part of her body that is located right under her ribs. This could make for some very enticing kissing sessions.
Pay attention to the way she kisses. People often give out what they would like to receive, so pay attention to the way she kisses you. That could be an indication of the way she wants you to kiss her. Does she bite on your lips? Reciprocate. She will love you for it. Tell her what you like. Does your loved one kiss you like she's trying to suck the life out of your body? Does she kiss too fast, too slow, or without using her tongue? Some women like it slow and gentle while others like it a bit more rough and demanding. Try not to tell her what you don't like, but rather what you do like. That way you won't hurt her feelings.
Control her mouth. The next time you kiss her, hold her face with your hands tenderly and kiss her the way you would like to be kissed. If this doesn’t turn her on, then your sensual tongue will surely do the trick. Make it long lasting. Women love long, slow, juicy, and enticing kisses. Your partner will definitely feel your passion through one of those prolonged tender kissing moments. Just like in the movies, kiss her hard and deep.
One last method, that I like myself. If you can come from behind her, start kissing her from the shoulders upward. Remember that you are standing at the back of her at all times. This method can only be applied if she wearing something that's showing her shoulders. Now slowly kiss upward to the neck area. Get her to feel the intensity of what's to come. If you're already in a deeper relationship, you can hold her in an embrace that lets her feel your body toucing hers. Now, slowly start to kiss her and move to the front of her at the same time. Don't break the kissing but let it flow naturally. She'll start to react and if she's keen she'll start to take over or just react more so. Both may start to actually feel horny at this point but than again that's the whole point, isn't it?
Bar advice. Kissing a woman is suppose to be fun. Don't complicate it with a lot of applied technique. Relax, and the magic will happen.
Research shows women's lips are one of their erogenous zone, so it's important for men to leave a lasting impression with women. If you French kiss her like no one else, you'll most likely to kiss something else of her next. know what I mean? The skill of kissing does not simply consist of knowing how to move your tongue inside a woman's mouth without hitting her tonsils. It involves the entire mouth. The lips, tongue, cheeks and the rest of the body.
Give the lady a hand. Position your hands on her body while kissing her. Hold her face, chhek area, firmly but gently as you slip your tongue inside her mouth and suck on her lips. This will definitely make her toes curl. Also, try to gently pull her hair back from the back or slightly squeezing the part of her body that is located right under her ribs. This could make for some very enticing kissing sessions.
Pay attention to the way she kisses. People often give out what they would like to receive, so pay attention to the way she kisses you. That could be an indication of the way she wants you to kiss her. Does she bite on your lips? Reciprocate. She will love you for it. Tell her what you like. Does your loved one kiss you like she's trying to suck the life out of your body? Does she kiss too fast, too slow, or without using her tongue? Some women like it slow and gentle while others like it a bit more rough and demanding. Try not to tell her what you don't like, but rather what you do like. That way you won't hurt her feelings.
Control her mouth. The next time you kiss her, hold her face with your hands tenderly and kiss her the way you would like to be kissed. If this doesn’t turn her on, then your sensual tongue will surely do the trick. Make it long lasting. Women love long, slow, juicy, and enticing kisses. Your partner will definitely feel your passion through one of those prolonged tender kissing moments. Just like in the movies, kiss her hard and deep.
One last method, that I like myself. If you can come from behind her, start kissing her from the shoulders upward. Remember that you are standing at the back of her at all times. This method can only be applied if she wearing something that's showing her shoulders. Now slowly kiss upward to the neck area. Get her to feel the intensity of what's to come. If you're already in a deeper relationship, you can hold her in an embrace that lets her feel your body toucing hers. Now, slowly start to kiss her and move to the front of her at the same time. Don't break the kissing but let it flow naturally. She'll start to react and if she's keen she'll start to take over or just react more so. Both may start to actually feel horny at this point but than again that's the whole point, isn't it?
Bar advice. Kissing a woman is suppose to be fun. Don't complicate it with a lot of applied technique. Relax, and the magic will happen.
Friday, February 8, 2008
Happy Chinese New Year 2008
2008 is the year of the Rat. According to the Chinese calender it is the return of the zodiac cycle. This is a "1 year" phase. It goes around every 12 years. This is also the year of the earth rat which comes about once every 60 years. It is said, not to be a good year for most people and it includes world economic difficulties, health issues, stock market turmoil and lots more. Lets see how it fares for you.
Rat
A like minded year when restless Rats refuse to settle into a routine. Your Yang essence takes the lead in romance during 2008. Cozy up to a home loving Ox, an outspoken Dragon or a fun-loving Monkey. This Rat year exacerbates your high strung disposition, and while this shouldn't affect your job productivity, it will definitely fray your nerves. Promotions are possible and money becomes more plentiful. Make certain that all business is kept on the up and up. Always plan for the future, as this will allow you to better enjoy the moment.
Ox
Due to the soulmate connection, Rat years are particularly good ones for Oxen. Your Yin essence balances well with the Yang Rat year energies. A family and security conscious year for you. Good financial luck, but be cautious not to spend too much. Many social events and opportunities for romance this year! Settle down with a clever Rat, a seductive Snake or brassy Rooster. Plant a garden, knit a new sweater or carve a custom set of furniture.
Tiger
Rat years are busy ones for Tiger natives and can be particularly exhausting, draining and depleting. 2008 is the “Steed” or action catalyst for you and extra caution is called for in any type of travel, change, or reevaluation this year. Expect delays, slow down and think all actions through carefully. Attending happy or joyful events such as weddings, births, reunions and celebrations. Although there may be difficulties, these will all be happily resolved by October. Be careful of romantic temptations which could affect your emotional and physical health.
Rabbit
The Rat and the Rabbit are in a “Peach blossom” or “Plum” relationship, responsible for romantic, even torrid love affairs. Rat years are filled with both passion and even danger for the Rabbit. Be cautious of commingling funds with or borrowing money from third parties. The Rat year may demand a commitment, which the detached and cautious Rabbit will resist. However, with 2008's energies, even reticent Rabbits could feel the urge to settle down. Don't be surprised if you become more of a committed finance rather than an artful dodger in 2008.
Dragon
A taste for novelty reins supreme for Dragons in 2008, and unpredictability rules the year. Dragon's feel like a new adventure is always just around the corner in Rat years and it promises to be one of activity and excitement. Financially, assets increase, but interpersonal tiffs may be troublesome. Candid, demanding and fond of being in the public eye, Dragons shine during Rat ruled periods. Best chance for serious romance in September's Rooster ruled month. Prepare the stage for an energetic evening with a feisty Rooster, a sarcastic Monkey or an eclectic Rat.
Snake
A four star year for Snakes when money and wealth flows in freely. When it comes to lovemaking the Snake is a master and virtuoso, and sex is something they are capable of surrendering themselves to, body and soul. Be cautious however, as this Rat year may increase your taste for forbidden fruit. Single Snakes may consider marriage or commitment during April or May. Now is the time to expand your social circle, networks and contacts which will lead to great financial benefits. Recognition by colleagues and an opportunity for carer advancement should make this a particularly enjoyable year.
Horse
Those born into Horse years are in opposition to the Rat and 2008 is a time for you to relax, vacation and take time for your physical, spiritual and mental health. A choice could be presented this year between your need for security and your need for independence. Never stop pursuing your dreams and ambitions, but keep everything status quo for now and wait for a more auspicious climate. Hold off on risky investments and be particularly cautious about anything that could cause problems with the law. Married Horses could be tempted by a love affair in July's Goat-ruled month.
Goat
The Rat year and the Goat can be a comedy of errors, but nothing that can't be mitigated with good humor. By the time the leisurely Goat wakes up to face the world, the energetic Rat has almost completed their day. Hyperactivity meets sloth in 2008 and the results can be inharmonious to say the least. Goats feel harried, hurried and hotheaded during Rat years, but careful planning will give you the edge. Journaling, writing poetry or putting pen to paper in any way will sooth your frazzled nerves and could produce some memorable work.
Monkeys
Monkeys will enjoy being in the compatibility trine (triangle) of harmony with this Rat year. April or May could see wedding bells ringing for you. Sexuality is explosive between Rat's and Monkey's and some exhausting nights of love await you in 2008. Intertwine your lovemaking with intellectual conversation from a sage Snake or discuss the cosmos with an otherworldly Dragon. You are in a very comfortable and prosperous position in 2008, but be discreet about your private life and selective in your social circles.
Rooster
The Rat and the Rooster are in a “Peach blossom” relationship, responsible for torrid love affairs, and 2008 can produce an emotional roller coaster ride for Rooster natives. This is a love/hate year of polarized emotions when your beloved will seem either enchanting or unbearable. This is a complicated pairing of energies and this Peach blossoms connection can easily become “forbidden fruit” so the utmost caution regarding romantic affairs is advised. Female Hens are very fertile year and pregnancy as well as marriage are strong possibilities. Build a cozy nest with a home loving Ox, sensual Snake or competent Dragon.
Dog
The relationship between the Rat and Dog resembles that of a parent/child power struggle with possible confrontations or misunderstandings. Don't borrow or use funds that are not yours for any reason this year and keep all business deals completely above board. Take time off to relax and recharge your batteries and love will be in the air. A romantic getaway with a savvy Rabbit, passionate Tiger or talkative Horse will have you howling at the moon! Be realistic in your planning and avoid wishful thinking for best results.
Pig
A harmonious and successful year awaits trusting Pig natives in 2008. There is a risk of you becoming opinionated and judgmental this year so consider that every situation has two sides to it. Your modesty will give you the edge in working with people this year. You are hardworking, but also fond of pleasure. Many opportunities for love affairs during 2008, so be cautious of scandals. Both the Rat and the Pig share the hidden element of Water in their branches bringing emotion, depth and adaptability to circumstances.
Bar advice. This is just one of many who have predictions about the year and your zodiac Chinese animal sign. In the end our fates are in our own hands.
The zero game
Well, in the rough, tough game of game of women, one thing can be true. The zero game but one big zero that is going to make it really hard for you to score is if you are in any way ashamed of sex or your sexuality. That is because women have been taught on a lot of levels to be ashamed of sex also. They are not rewarded for acting sexually in public for example. Think of what happens when they even dress too revealing. They get labeled as sluts and get scorned by older women, peers and even a lot of men.
In some extreme cases, women are taught by their parents that their genitals are some how "dirty", etc. In other words a taboo subject or something not to be seen or talked about. There are many other examples you can probably think of. It is rare that you meet a truly liberated woman who is totally free of any kind of residual shame about sex, or at least negative consequences of acting like she is not ashamed of it. What this means is that often you as a man will have to be the balancing force in the equation, the one that is very comfortable with the idea of how awesome and natural sex is. You have to be the one who will "take the blame" for taking about it, starting it,etc. The more repressed she might be, the more positive you have to balance the equation. The problem though is that somehow modern culture is telling a lot of guys to turn off their sexuality in order to act like a "nice guy".
Many guys who was under this mistaken assumption that if they acted like they didn't want sex outside of marriage or a really committed relationship then they would make themself look nice enough for her to want to date. Even though sex is what you want in the end, you're ashamed to admit it to her for fear she would think that was all you wanted or that you're a pervert. The truth is, if you act ashamed of sex in any way, then it will be extremely hard for things to get sexual with you and the average woman. For the rare females who really do want sex, they will get bored and find a guy who does want it. The ones who are ashamed will just go along with your frame or have it much later than you both might really want.
What instead needs to happen is that you have to in effect "take responsibility" for any of the shame of sex. It means that your actions and the things you say have to communicate to her things like this. "It is not your fault if you and I end up making love". "You are not a slut for having slept with me". "Other people don't have to know about this, nobody else will think any less of you". "I know that you don't do this with other guys and what we are doing is new for you". "I really enjoy being with you sexually, I hope you do too".
Talking to her, you would not say these things exactly, but the deeper message would be the same. You basically have to relieve her of any guilt she might feel and let her know there will be nothing bad that comes from it. Lets look at a verbal example, while you are making out with her, she might tell you "we shouldn't be doing this". In that case, you can assure her that you know she's "a good girl" and the blame is shifted off her shoulders. What about an example that shows you like sex through your actions? Here's an example. Let's say you are flipping through the pages of a magazine and sexy images appear of men and women, possibly nude, and she's around and saw it too. If you keep going and act like it was never there, you are acting ashamed of sex. You get a ZERO!
The point here really is to focus on the fact that sex is natural. The human body can be seen in this manner as well. Women are not going to jump into bed with you just becuase it is but if they see that you see it as such and they begin to feel comfortable that way then things will change. They will find it not so taboo a subject, there's nothing "dirty" about it or their bodies, they're not going to listen to mummy's old folks advice and sex is nothing to be ashmed of. No more zeros after that lesson!
Bar advice. If you add up all the points here and you come up with zero. The games over for you. Than again you could just restart from zero, upwards.
In some extreme cases, women are taught by their parents that their genitals are some how "dirty", etc. In other words a taboo subject or something not to be seen or talked about. There are many other examples you can probably think of. It is rare that you meet a truly liberated woman who is totally free of any kind of residual shame about sex, or at least negative consequences of acting like she is not ashamed of it. What this means is that often you as a man will have to be the balancing force in the equation, the one that is very comfortable with the idea of how awesome and natural sex is. You have to be the one who will "take the blame" for taking about it, starting it,etc. The more repressed she might be, the more positive you have to balance the equation. The problem though is that somehow modern culture is telling a lot of guys to turn off their sexuality in order to act like a "nice guy". Many guys who was under this mistaken assumption that if they acted like they didn't want sex outside of marriage or a really committed relationship then they would make themself look nice enough for her to want to date. Even though sex is what you want in the end, you're ashamed to admit it to her for fear she would think that was all you wanted or that you're a pervert. The truth is, if you act ashamed of sex in any way, then it will be extremely hard for things to get sexual with you and the average woman. For the rare females who really do want sex, they will get bored and find a guy who does want it. The ones who are ashamed will just go along with your frame or have it much later than you both might really want.
What instead needs to happen is that you have to in effect "take responsibility" for any of the shame of sex. It means that your actions and the things you say have to communicate to her things like this. "It is not your fault if you and I end up making love". "You are not a slut for having slept with me". "Other people don't have to know about this, nobody else will think any less of you". "I know that you don't do this with other guys and what we are doing is new for you". "I really enjoy being with you sexually, I hope you do too".
Talking to her, you would not say these things exactly, but the deeper message would be the same. You basically have to relieve her of any guilt she might feel and let her know there will be nothing bad that comes from it. Lets look at a verbal example, while you are making out with her, she might tell you "we shouldn't be doing this". In that case, you can assure her that you know she's "a good girl" and the blame is shifted off her shoulders. What about an example that shows you like sex through your actions? Here's an example. Let's say you are flipping through the pages of a magazine and sexy images appear of men and women, possibly nude, and she's around and saw it too. If you keep going and act like it was never there, you are acting ashamed of sex. You get a ZERO!The point here really is to focus on the fact that sex is natural. The human body can be seen in this manner as well. Women are not going to jump into bed with you just becuase it is but if they see that you see it as such and they begin to feel comfortable that way then things will change. They will find it not so taboo a subject, there's nothing "dirty" about it or their bodies, they're not going to listen to mummy's old folks advice and sex is nothing to be ashmed of. No more zeros after that lesson!
Bar advice. If you add up all the points here and you come up with zero. The games over for you. Than again you could just restart from zero, upwards.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Women love sex just as much as men do
Let me share some insights into the psychology and biology of women with you today. Insights that will really help you guys. The title almost says it all. Women love sex just as much as men do. I might have to convince you of this and explain how you guys can use it to your advantage.
You might find it hard to believe that women love sex as much as men do. If that were true, you might be asking why isn't it easier to get women to go to bed with you, right? If it were not for some elusive facts of biology, it really would be easy, but it's not. When women go up to men and say something along the lines of "Hi, I like you, would you like to sleep with me?" something like 99% of the men will say yes. However, when the roles were reversed, women will probably say no when men ask the same question. The reason is that women are essentially genetically programmed to be really picky about who they have sex with. It is all a supply and demand equation, because women only have a limited supply of chances to reproduce, most women can't have more than say ten children in their lives, and the act of childbirth could kill them too, so you can add 'evolved fear' into the low supply problem.
If that wasn't enough, there are a lot of social consequences that women have to deal with when they have sex with men. They can get labeled as sluts, whores, cheap or easy for having sex with more than one guy. By contrast, as men we can pretty much have hundreds of children if given the chance. Our "supply" of reproduction capability is just about limitless compared to that of women. Having sex with lots of women usually gets guys labeled as studs, top dog and so on, at least with male friends. So you put all this together and you can understand why women are picky and almost seem like they don't like or want sex as much as men do. In reality they do.
The main difference is that men want more partners(quantity), women want better 'quality' partners. OK, so you understand this now, lets really reinforce this idea that women like sex just as much as men do. This is also due to evolution. Both sexes are rewarded with lots of pleasure for sex, its one way that our genes have programmed us to help pass themselves along to the next generation. In fact, I would say that women can get more pleasure out of sex than men. I mean, come on, which sex can have more fun with a showerhead or vibrator? Also, which sex can have multiple, prolonged orgasms, and sometimes they just need another female to get this? These are all things I have witnessed personally in my life and as such I have no doubt that, done properly, sex causes more overall pleasure for women. Scientifically it also prolongs lifespans of people. Women especially.
Women want(keyword) sex just as much as men. So now that you have this fact in mind, how do you use it? The answer is simple, you constantly have the attitude in mind that women want sex just as much or more than men do and in every interaction that you have with them, you keep this in mind. (Please don't go thinking about it in a perverted manner.) Also, keep in mind that a women has to preserve her modesty. Her mother thought her to be a lady and not go with any boy because they just want one thing. We know what that is but actually she wants it too but she'll only give it to you if you are worthy of her. Sp you see, it is simple, but it has really powerful effects. It makes the balance of power more equal in all your interactions with women. Let's look at how this works.
I can remember when I didn't understand how much women love and want sex, and so I used to always think that I was trying to get them to do something they didn't want to do as much as I did. What happens when somebody wants something more than the other person? They are willing to go to much effort to get it. In the case of women, it gets worse if you act like this and put in too much effort, because they then assume on some level that you don't get much of it either(otherwise why would you be trying so hard?), and by extension that there must be some reason for that, like something is wrong with you on some level. Which makes them withhold sex from you more, which makes you try harder, which makes them withhold even more, and what you end up with is a permanent case of blue balls. When you take the frame one step further and understand and believe that women want and love sex more than men do, then you can amazingly flip the roles in the above situation.
Your actions indicate to her that you know she wants you more. You interpret her actions as her wanting you too much, and you pull away a bit. She sees this and thinks on a deeper level that you must have a lot of options with women, so she chases you a bit more, you retreat, she pursues harder, and you eventually succumb since that was your plan all along. Of course, there is a lot more to learn about exactly how to reverse this role with women, and it is a big part of what you need to understand about this method. The simple take away for today is that you need to understand and believe that women want sex as much or more than men do.
Be sure to never force the issue. Women are very delicate creatures and a lot of them need refined tenderness and thoughtfullness. I know of some women that can be a wild tigeress in bed but she puts on the facade of a pussycat to see wheather you are worthy of herself and why you are deserving to be with her. She wants it but she likes to tease and when she, and only she, is willing she'll let you have it.
Bar advice. I'm sure the women reading this will agree with me a huge amount but it's just help for some of the guys that "don't get it".
You might find it hard to believe that women love sex as much as men do. If that were true, you might be asking why isn't it easier to get women to go to bed with you, right? If it were not for some elusive facts of biology, it really would be easy, but it's not. When women go up to men and say something along the lines of "Hi, I like you, would you like to sleep with me?" something like 99% of the men will say yes. However, when the roles were reversed, women will probably say no when men ask the same question. The reason is that women are essentially genetically programmed to be really picky about who they have sex with. It is all a supply and demand equation, because women only have a limited supply of chances to reproduce, most women can't have more than say ten children in their lives, and the act of childbirth could kill them too, so you can add 'evolved fear' into the low supply problem.
If that wasn't enough, there are a lot of social consequences that women have to deal with when they have sex with men. They can get labeled as sluts, whores, cheap or easy for having sex with more than one guy. By contrast, as men we can pretty much have hundreds of children if given the chance. Our "supply" of reproduction capability is just about limitless compared to that of women. Having sex with lots of women usually gets guys labeled as studs, top dog and so on, at least with male friends. So you put all this together and you can understand why women are picky and almost seem like they don't like or want sex as much as men do. In reality they do.
The main difference is that men want more partners(quantity), women want better 'quality' partners. OK, so you understand this now, lets really reinforce this idea that women like sex just as much as men do. This is also due to evolution. Both sexes are rewarded with lots of pleasure for sex, its one way that our genes have programmed us to help pass themselves along to the next generation. In fact, I would say that women can get more pleasure out of sex than men. I mean, come on, which sex can have more fun with a showerhead or vibrator? Also, which sex can have multiple, prolonged orgasms, and sometimes they just need another female to get this? These are all things I have witnessed personally in my life and as such I have no doubt that, done properly, sex causes more overall pleasure for women. Scientifically it also prolongs lifespans of people. Women especially.
Women want(keyword) sex just as much as men. So now that you have this fact in mind, how do you use it? The answer is simple, you constantly have the attitude in mind that women want sex just as much or more than men do and in every interaction that you have with them, you keep this in mind. (Please don't go thinking about it in a perverted manner.) Also, keep in mind that a women has to preserve her modesty. Her mother thought her to be a lady and not go with any boy because they just want one thing. We know what that is but actually she wants it too but she'll only give it to you if you are worthy of her. Sp you see, it is simple, but it has really powerful effects. It makes the balance of power more equal in all your interactions with women. Let's look at how this works.
I can remember when I didn't understand how much women love and want sex, and so I used to always think that I was trying to get them to do something they didn't want to do as much as I did. What happens when somebody wants something more than the other person? They are willing to go to much effort to get it. In the case of women, it gets worse if you act like this and put in too much effort, because they then assume on some level that you don't get much of it either(otherwise why would you be trying so hard?), and by extension that there must be some reason for that, like something is wrong with you on some level. Which makes them withhold sex from you more, which makes you try harder, which makes them withhold even more, and what you end up with is a permanent case of blue balls. When you take the frame one step further and understand and believe that women want and love sex more than men do, then you can amazingly flip the roles in the above situation.
Your actions indicate to her that you know she wants you more. You interpret her actions as her wanting you too much, and you pull away a bit. She sees this and thinks on a deeper level that you must have a lot of options with women, so she chases you a bit more, you retreat, she pursues harder, and you eventually succumb since that was your plan all along. Of course, there is a lot more to learn about exactly how to reverse this role with women, and it is a big part of what you need to understand about this method. The simple take away for today is that you need to understand and believe that women want sex as much or more than men do.
Be sure to never force the issue. Women are very delicate creatures and a lot of them need refined tenderness and thoughtfullness. I know of some women that can be a wild tigeress in bed but she puts on the facade of a pussycat to see wheather you are worthy of herself and why you are deserving to be with her. She wants it but she likes to tease and when she, and only she, is willing she'll let you have it.
Bar advice. I'm sure the women reading this will agree with me a huge amount but it's just help for some of the guys that "don't get it".
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
The safety man
You see it all the time at bars & clubs. A group of girls, sometimes just three or as many as five or six, with one sole guy in their group. You may think this guy is "with" one of the girls but many times he's not, unless his name is Hugh Hefner.
He is tagging along, but why? What are his reasons? Usually it's one of only two reasons. He's infatuated with one of the girls in the group, hoping to hook up with her or he's hoping to improve his odds with any of the girls in the group. The vast majority of the time, however, in fact the most probable outcome is, he will not achieve anything. He will not get any further along with any of the girls than he'd gotten before. If it were possible for him, he'd have known how to do it already and not need to waste time grasping at such flimsy opportunities rather than taking initiative at other times. So why do the group of girls take him along on their "girl's nightout" when none of them have any preconceived intentions to hook upwith him?
One of them(rarely) may very well actually like him in "that way" (all the girls in the group will already know about it) and think this will be an opportunity for him to bust a move (he won't or he will do it pathetically).Commonly, they need a "safety man". What is a "safety man"? A safety man is a guy girls will have in their group for the sole purpose of allowing them to focus on their "girl's night out without the distraction of guys they don't like "hitting on them". To most men, the safety man is ambiguously with all the girls and may be the boyfriend of one of them or may be the boyfriend of the one they might be interested in. Most guys fear the repercussions of approaching a girl who may bewith her boyfriend, so the safety man acts as a sort of "always a shield" for the girls in the group.
When one of them happens to see a guy she may be interested in, the girls all have their social dynamics well in sync to know how to "lower the safety man shield" to make their group(or a certain girl in the group) less intimidating to approach. That's pretty much it. Girls are so sneaky, arent they? But why would I want to talk about this subject? I want people to avoid falling into the trap of being the safety man and to consider taking advantage of the opportunities in ways you may not have considered before.
If you're dating one of the girls(and getting sex from her), then great, enjoy yourself and make sure you're out with them because you have fun and not because you're insecure about whether your girlfriend will cheat on you. If not, why be the safety man for them at all? Unless you want to boost your image to other women at the clubs and get to know them. That's what you ought to be doing. If you're sleeping with the whole entourage of girls than there's nothing to be said. If not, and you have been made the safety man, you'll find other women around easier to approach and talk to. Women will see you as non treating, liked by other women and they'll wonder what is it that other women in the group see in you to have you around. Curiosity will get the better of them so turm up the charm and smile. Phone numbers are going to be slipped to you.
Bar advice. Letting the girls have you as a safety man is one of the best ways of getting to know other women unless you're already attached to one of them.
He is tagging along, but why? What are his reasons? Usually it's one of only two reasons. He's infatuated with one of the girls in the group, hoping to hook up with her or he's hoping to improve his odds with any of the girls in the group. The vast majority of the time, however, in fact the most probable outcome is, he will not achieve anything. He will not get any further along with any of the girls than he'd gotten before. If it were possible for him, he'd have known how to do it already and not need to waste time grasping at such flimsy opportunities rather than taking initiative at other times. So why do the group of girls take him along on their "girl's nightout" when none of them have any preconceived intentions to hook upwith him?
One of them(rarely) may very well actually like him in "that way" (all the girls in the group will already know about it) and think this will be an opportunity for him to bust a move (he won't or he will do it pathetically).Commonly, they need a "safety man". What is a "safety man"? A safety man is a guy girls will have in their group for the sole purpose of allowing them to focus on their "girl's night out without the distraction of guys they don't like "hitting on them". To most men, the safety man is ambiguously with all the girls and may be the boyfriend of one of them or may be the boyfriend of the one they might be interested in. Most guys fear the repercussions of approaching a girl who may bewith her boyfriend, so the safety man acts as a sort of "always a shield" for the girls in the group.
When one of them happens to see a guy she may be interested in, the girls all have their social dynamics well in sync to know how to "lower the safety man shield" to make their group(or a certain girl in the group) less intimidating to approach. That's pretty much it. Girls are so sneaky, arent they? But why would I want to talk about this subject? I want people to avoid falling into the trap of being the safety man and to consider taking advantage of the opportunities in ways you may not have considered before.
If you're dating one of the girls(and getting sex from her), then great, enjoy yourself and make sure you're out with them because you have fun and not because you're insecure about whether your girlfriend will cheat on you. If not, why be the safety man for them at all? Unless you want to boost your image to other women at the clubs and get to know them. That's what you ought to be doing. If you're sleeping with the whole entourage of girls than there's nothing to be said. If not, and you have been made the safety man, you'll find other women around easier to approach and talk to. Women will see you as non treating, liked by other women and they'll wonder what is it that other women in the group see in you to have you around. Curiosity will get the better of them so turm up the charm and smile. Phone numbers are going to be slipped to you.
Bar advice. Letting the girls have you as a safety man is one of the best ways of getting to know other women unless you're already attached to one of them.
Using technology when meeting people.
Recently I got to know this lovely model cum porn star. She does a lot of photo shoots with clothes on but she does nude stuff as well. At first I didn't know that she did all this but when I got to see some of her "normal" sexy pictures I was really impressed with her. She's actually Japanese but living somewhere else(not saying) and is still studying.
Talking to this girl is not easy. She's highly in demand and I assume a lot of guys are interested to talk with her but she's told me that she doesn't like to chat with people all that much via the Internet. I try not to bother her too much because I don't want to loose her as a friend. Never met a porn star before so, as a guy, you can't blame me for fantasizing. She actually agreed to meet me if I did come around to where she was staying but I would have to give her ample notice. At least two months. Can you believe that?
I managed to get this short video. Maybe even some of you girls will get turned on. I know the guys will. All the other videos are not really hardcore videos but more soft porn than anything else. While using technology when meeting people can be easier, it also gives people methods of expression that tells people who they are and not be afraid about it. We can be repulsed or condone this but we have to accept that people's choices are their own.
Bar advice. You never know who you'll meet online. Sometimes people that seem unreachable wants a friend.
Talking to this girl is not easy. She's highly in demand and I assume a lot of guys are interested to talk with her but she's told me that she doesn't like to chat with people all that much via the Internet. I try not to bother her too much because I don't want to loose her as a friend. Never met a porn star before so, as a guy, you can't blame me for fantasizing. She actually agreed to meet me if I did come around to where she was staying but I would have to give her ample notice. At least two months. Can you believe that? I managed to get this short video. Maybe even some of you girls will get turned on. I know the guys will. All the other videos are not really hardcore videos but more soft porn than anything else. While using technology when meeting people can be easier, it also gives people methods of expression that tells people who they are and not be afraid about it. We can be repulsed or condone this but we have to accept that people's choices are their own.
Bar advice. You never know who you'll meet online. Sometimes people that seem unreachable wants a friend.
Saturday, February 2, 2008
Talking to strangers
So many of us find it difficult, some nearly even impossible, to start talking to strangers. Maybe because it was so ingrained in us as kids that it was dangerous to do so, or maybe precisely the opposite. Maybe as adults we're all too aware of the sting of rejection.
Whatever the case, in the grown-up world, one without unnecessary ego attachments, there's nothing wrong with chatting up that cute girl or hot guy who's caught your eye. In fact, you may be missing out on an opportunity if you don't at least smile and say hello. You never know if they may be looking for a good person in their lives as well.On that note, believe it or not, the best thing to do might just be that simple. Smile. Yes, smile but sincerely. You know, not that plastered on,"I'm terrified doing this", kind of smile but rather a genuine warm greeting and say "hello". Ask how they are. Ask if they come there often (ironically of course because you both know you see each other in this space almost everyday). Just come out with small talk that hopefully makes sense and doesn't show your nerves. Be natural and if you make or say something dumb, laugh it off because the other person is probably feeling the same at that moment as well. They'll understand. You won't look stupid.
If it's the first time you're noticing this person, don't let that stop you. A little common everyday friendliness will help. Mention uncharacteristic weather, a headline in the news (particularly if a paper's in sight) or even the traffic and the door is opened to communication. Remember, your "pick up line" need not be a line at all (in fact, it shouldn't be), nor does it have to be the most creative conversation in the world. The point is to let the person know you've noticed them and have a conversation. Girls, especialy, should know that men will jump into a conversation if they initiate it because guys are worse in the approach game. They get all tongue tighed and the blurr state or stage fright syndrome takes over and they fear looking like a complete moron so they say nothing.
If you're still searching, take note of common ground. Even though the person in question may be a stranger, there's no doubt you share something in common. If you're at a certain place than you both go there often but if at that moment, it must be for a purpose. So try to get up the nerve to say something before the moment slips. Just remember, don't be afraid at what's the worst that can happen. Even they not responding in a friendly fashion or they completely ignore you. If that's the case, you're not really interested anyway, are you? Move on.
If you aren't particularly shy and can take it past a smile and hello, make your introduction more personal by noticing and commenting on something specific about your potential paramour. Are they wearing a new coat? Did they get a haircut? Do you always notice their shoes,dog,hair, beverage of choice? Whatever the detail, ask about it. Compliment it. Show, casually of course without seeming stalker like, that you've paid attention to them in the past or that you're paying attention at that moment. A person who is similarly interested will take the hint most of the time. They'll start to be interested in someone that notices them.
Lastly, if this whole idea makes you nervous, ask yourself why? What have you got to lose? Better to try talking and get no response than wonder about that "missed chance", right? If it helps, remember that people who are skilled at talking with strangers rarely plumb the depths with them in casual conversation. They start simple. They smile. They comment on the world around them. Then they find out, courtesy of the universe and its energy, that great things can happen when you're not afraid to reach out for the smallest human connection.
Bar advice. Technology makes the world a smaller place but if you can't communicate with another person in front of you, your world is still huge.
Whatever the case, in the grown-up world, one without unnecessary ego attachments, there's nothing wrong with chatting up that cute girl or hot guy who's caught your eye. In fact, you may be missing out on an opportunity if you don't at least smile and say hello. You never know if they may be looking for a good person in their lives as well.On that note, believe it or not, the best thing to do might just be that simple. Smile. Yes, smile but sincerely. You know, not that plastered on,"I'm terrified doing this", kind of smile but rather a genuine warm greeting and say "hello". Ask how they are. Ask if they come there often (ironically of course because you both know you see each other in this space almost everyday). Just come out with small talk that hopefully makes sense and doesn't show your nerves. Be natural and if you make or say something dumb, laugh it off because the other person is probably feeling the same at that moment as well. They'll understand. You won't look stupid.
If it's the first time you're noticing this person, don't let that stop you. A little common everyday friendliness will help. Mention uncharacteristic weather, a headline in the news (particularly if a paper's in sight) or even the traffic and the door is opened to communication. Remember, your "pick up line" need not be a line at all (in fact, it shouldn't be), nor does it have to be the most creative conversation in the world. The point is to let the person know you've noticed them and have a conversation. Girls, especialy, should know that men will jump into a conversation if they initiate it because guys are worse in the approach game. They get all tongue tighed and the blurr state or stage fright syndrome takes over and they fear looking like a complete moron so they say nothing.
If you're still searching, take note of common ground. Even though the person in question may be a stranger, there's no doubt you share something in common. If you're at a certain place than you both go there often but if at that moment, it must be for a purpose. So try to get up the nerve to say something before the moment slips. Just remember, don't be afraid at what's the worst that can happen. Even they not responding in a friendly fashion or they completely ignore you. If that's the case, you're not really interested anyway, are you? Move on.
If you aren't particularly shy and can take it past a smile and hello, make your introduction more personal by noticing and commenting on something specific about your potential paramour. Are they wearing a new coat? Did they get a haircut? Do you always notice their shoes,dog,hair, beverage of choice? Whatever the detail, ask about it. Compliment it. Show, casually of course without seeming stalker like, that you've paid attention to them in the past or that you're paying attention at that moment. A person who is similarly interested will take the hint most of the time. They'll start to be interested in someone that notices them.
Lastly, if this whole idea makes you nervous, ask yourself why? What have you got to lose? Better to try talking and get no response than wonder about that "missed chance", right? If it helps, remember that people who are skilled at talking with strangers rarely plumb the depths with them in casual conversation. They start simple. They smile. They comment on the world around them. Then they find out, courtesy of the universe and its energy, that great things can happen when you're not afraid to reach out for the smallest human connection.
Bar advice. Technology makes the world a smaller place but if you can't communicate with another person in front of you, your world is still huge.
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