This is a You Tube video about lines used by men to pick up women. These ten women tell the truth about their feelings about the crap that men do and the pick up lines that turns them off.
Bar advice. Guys have to work on proper lines. If you call them pick up lines, well, you're already in trouble. Women want an invitation or proposal for company.
Monday, December 3, 2007
What not to do on first dates
This may surprise you, but you shouldn't take women on dates. That might sound strange, doesn't it? If you take a woman to dinner and a movie, you're asking to be strung along like a book club member. You set yourself up for all sorts of mistakes and you're just begging for uncomfortable silences and boring conversation.
You can make it work but you'll just make yourself work a lot harder. So what should you do instead? Well, best case scenario you create an instant date. You go from meeting up to going somewhere, together. This can mean moving from the bookstore to a coffee shop, one club to another or often, to begin, just leading a woman from one part of a bar to another. maybe the bar counter to the pool table, to a seat or patio area for fresh air.
Create a powerful move. Say you want to tell or show her something. Maybe it can be about something you want to show her at your house, like an album or a book. (Done subtly, this is a great way to lead to your place). Take her hand and lead her to a more secluded spot in the home. Don't put your hands all over her you'll look desperate and a perv. Once you've led her somewhere, you've shifted the world a little bit because you are together, alone. Maintain strong eye contact. Speak in a quieter, confidential voice (the kind she wants to lean in to hear). Set yourself up that way, and it should be much easier to get things moving. The important thing is that you concentrate not on getting a woman to bed, but on moving to the next step.
Once you've got a connection, next is changing settings so you reaffirm and strengthen that connection. This is good in so many ways. It gives you a chance to get to know the girl quickly, which is impressive when it happens quickly, plus it let's you figure out if the lady is worth your time before you've invested much effort. It should feel natural. It's low-pressure fun. Spontaneous, without expectations or commitments. It's just great. Not to mention it allows you to set the pace you proceed at.
Initially, don't ask her to dinner. If possible, don't even ask her in advance. A spontaneous meeting at a coffee shop or going shopping in a flea market with built-in conversation is great. Make sure you're going somewhere fun. The kind of place with strange knick-knacks all around so you're conversation can naturally flow from your surroundings. Why do extra work when you can let the atmosphere help you? Maybe miniature golf. You don't need skills for that and if you are good, it gives you the opportunity get behind her and show her how to play.
One key thing is , Don't Pay All! Especially with a woman you've just met. Paying says all the wrong things. In the old days it was the "gentlemanly thing" to do but it's different in this day and age. Women will read it different ways. It says "I'm not interesting, so I'm bribing you to spend time with me." Also, "I want to prove I'm good guy material by showing off my financial success." The corollary, "I'm insecure, so like a man with a small penis and a hot sports car, I'm trying to buy myself some confidence." Worse still, "I don't really know you, but I think you're hot so I'm going to try and buy my way into your pants." Equally cringe worthy, "I just paid for you. Now what are you going to do for me?". The part about you being a gentleman just skips the ladies minds at times.
The biggest reasons to avoid the dinner date, at least to begin, is not creating an awkward social setting with someone you barely know. You basically force all sorts of uncomfortable thoughts about the money involved. My advice. Coffee? Who cares about a couple of bucks? Shopping? You're not going to buy her something, are you? That smells of bribery worse than dinner, and you'll just make her uneasy. Avoid putting yourself in situations where the issue of payment comes up, and you'll avoid this whole can of worms.
Bar Advice. More conversation are needed first. Be it the phone, messenger, emails, PC cams or whatever. Be comfortable and you'll both be at ease. These awkward issues can be resolved even before going out.
You can make it work but you'll just make yourself work a lot harder. So what should you do instead? Well, best case scenario you create an instant date. You go from meeting up to going somewhere, together. This can mean moving from the bookstore to a coffee shop, one club to another or often, to begin, just leading a woman from one part of a bar to another. maybe the bar counter to the pool table, to a seat or patio area for fresh air.
Create a powerful move. Say you want to tell or show her something. Maybe it can be about something you want to show her at your house, like an album or a book. (Done subtly, this is a great way to lead to your place). Take her hand and lead her to a more secluded spot in the home. Don't put your hands all over her you'll look desperate and a perv. Once you've led her somewhere, you've shifted the world a little bit because you are together, alone. Maintain strong eye contact. Speak in a quieter, confidential voice (the kind she wants to lean in to hear). Set yourself up that way, and it should be much easier to get things moving. The important thing is that you concentrate not on getting a woman to bed, but on moving to the next step.
Once you've got a connection, next is changing settings so you reaffirm and strengthen that connection. This is good in so many ways. It gives you a chance to get to know the girl quickly, which is impressive when it happens quickly, plus it let's you figure out if the lady is worth your time before you've invested much effort. It should feel natural. It's low-pressure fun. Spontaneous, without expectations or commitments. It's just great. Not to mention it allows you to set the pace you proceed at.
Initially, don't ask her to dinner. If possible, don't even ask her in advance. A spontaneous meeting at a coffee shop or going shopping in a flea market with built-in conversation is great. Make sure you're going somewhere fun. The kind of place with strange knick-knacks all around so you're conversation can naturally flow from your surroundings. Why do extra work when you can let the atmosphere help you? Maybe miniature golf. You don't need skills for that and if you are good, it gives you the opportunity get behind her and show her how to play.
One key thing is , Don't Pay All! Especially with a woman you've just met. Paying says all the wrong things. In the old days it was the "gentlemanly thing" to do but it's different in this day and age. Women will read it different ways. It says "I'm not interesting, so I'm bribing you to spend time with me." Also, "I want to prove I'm good guy material by showing off my financial success." The corollary, "I'm insecure, so like a man with a small penis and a hot sports car, I'm trying to buy myself some confidence." Worse still, "I don't really know you, but I think you're hot so I'm going to try and buy my way into your pants." Equally cringe worthy, "I just paid for you. Now what are you going to do for me?". The part about you being a gentleman just skips the ladies minds at times.
The biggest reasons to avoid the dinner date, at least to begin, is not creating an awkward social setting with someone you barely know. You basically force all sorts of uncomfortable thoughts about the money involved. My advice. Coffee? Who cares about a couple of bucks? Shopping? You're not going to buy her something, are you? That smells of bribery worse than dinner, and you'll just make her uneasy. Avoid putting yourself in situations where the issue of payment comes up, and you'll avoid this whole can of worms.
Bar Advice. More conversation are needed first. Be it the phone, messenger, emails, PC cams or whatever. Be comfortable and you'll both be at ease. These awkward issues can be resolved even before going out.
Female Sexual Desire & Sexual Group Anatomy
For those that don't like to read hers something a bit more visual and audible. Don't be afraid to pay attention.
Second video is excellent as well. This is questions from people and a sexual group anatomy video. She answers candidly. I advise you to watch and listen. Quite graphic.
Bar advice. We all need lessons. Those that need better advice should seek it to improve their sexual and normal daily life.
Second video is excellent as well. This is questions from people and a sexual group anatomy video. She answers candidly. I advise you to watch and listen. Quite graphic.
Bar advice. We all need lessons. Those that need better advice should seek it to improve their sexual and normal daily life.
Sexual fantasies
The only reason why people keep their fantasies to themselves is because they fear that people will think of them as weird, crazy or something like that. Sexual fantasies may involve having sex in a public place or with a friend's partner or even violence and rape. Women may have 'fantasy sex' with several men at once, while men may show an inclination towards the extremes of virgins or prostitutes. Sometimes it's just our own small fetishes that we desire.
Sometimes a woman who 'dreams' about making love to another woman may fear she is a lesbian, while a man who 'dreams' about a prostitute may feel he is betraying his wife. The actual act did not occur so there is nothing to fear. This is actually just normal human traits. It can happen consciously or subconsciously. Can we control our minds from the neurons that feed these cravings or desires? Unless you're comatose and not know what's going on. Even in that state we can't tell if someone is fantasizing. People feel there's a link to this and real life dangers that they can pose to others because of their sexual behaviour and thoughts.
Some people convince themselves that they may act out such fantasies in real life or even that they are mentally ill. It is easy to understand why some people might feel guilt and concern about their fantasies. Nevertheless, having any particular fantasy is, by itself, generally not seen as an indication that a person has a psychological problem or personality disorder. We all got some sort of fantasy. It can be general like being super rich, being a celebrity or having a dream home. The main point is that even if those fantasies came true you'd still have sexual fantasies. It's something we all cannot escape from.
I'll bet that even holy men have them as well. We don't talk about this but we know that everyone is human. They may suppress them better than others but now and again they probably arise. There's no shame in this because it's part of our human essence. In fact if you're in a relationship, my advice is to talk to your partner. Get this topic out in the open. Make things start to fill those fantasies up. Find out what he wants and what she wants. This is probably going to fire up your sex life so much that you won't know left from right. Your love relationship is your special resource that aids your sexual relationship. I just ended another session of cyber sex with the same girl previously and again she masturbated and enjoyed herself. This fantasy between me and her is just beginning.
Now let's say your man makes a comment on a sexy outfit you both saw in a magazine. He's probably imagining the girl not the clothes but don't be offended. Take it as a opportunity to fill his desires. Find a way to get that outfit or like it and role play what he wants. If a women is checking out a guy dancing she may imagine herself as the seductive partner. Make your own teasing dance when you get home. Don't go blowing up and arguing about what she was looking at and why she's interested in the guy. That all doesn't make any sense and your role playing fantasies is short lived.
Even watching porn together, and I'm not suggesting anything illegal, will help both partners experiment with things that one may not have known about or was unwilling to do. Sometimes it may backfire as pain may be involved. Do what you're comfortable with. Illustrated books can also help. The Karma Sutra has been around a long time. There are things in there that you never even heard of, tried or did. Discussing the most erotic fantasies could also put you on the path to some juicy sex.
Anything to do with more than the two of you, for example threesomes or more, is entirely between the two of you. This I advise against if there isn't strong trust between both partners. Many a time one will accuse the other of doing things with someone else without them present. If you're into this sort of thing it is always best to be with the other present. If the bonds of trust are broken it's doomed. Listen here. If you're getting the permission to be with another person sexually in the presents of your partner why do you need to sneak of with someone alone? This is the life of swingers but I'll get into that another time
Having these secret fantasies come true will make you and your partner have a better sex life. Nothing gets stale and people tend to stay together in the relationship a long time. Why go anywhere else? If you can't do it all the time maybe you can work it out to a point that both of you can do it once a week or fortnightly. Maybe you can take turns to address your partners fantasy that way there's anticipation when it comes to your week. All said and done if there's to much going on like work, then just have normal passionate sex. Making love to the person you love in a passionate sexual manner far outweighs any fantasy that's in peoples minds.
Bar advice. Sometimes staying away from each other sexually for a short time can build to a more eager anticipation. Playfulness and build up to the event will be a fantasy all on it's own.
Sometimes a woman who 'dreams' about making love to another woman may fear she is a lesbian, while a man who 'dreams' about a prostitute may feel he is betraying his wife. The actual act did not occur so there is nothing to fear. This is actually just normal human traits. It can happen consciously or subconsciously. Can we control our minds from the neurons that feed these cravings or desires? Unless you're comatose and not know what's going on. Even in that state we can't tell if someone is fantasizing. People feel there's a link to this and real life dangers that they can pose to others because of their sexual behaviour and thoughts.
Some people convince themselves that they may act out such fantasies in real life or even that they are mentally ill. It is easy to understand why some people might feel guilt and concern about their fantasies. Nevertheless, having any particular fantasy is, by itself, generally not seen as an indication that a person has a psychological problem or personality disorder. We all got some sort of fantasy. It can be general like being super rich, being a celebrity or having a dream home. The main point is that even if those fantasies came true you'd still have sexual fantasies. It's something we all cannot escape from.
I'll bet that even holy men have them as well. We don't talk about this but we know that everyone is human. They may suppress them better than others but now and again they probably arise. There's no shame in this because it's part of our human essence. In fact if you're in a relationship, my advice is to talk to your partner. Get this topic out in the open. Make things start to fill those fantasies up. Find out what he wants and what she wants. This is probably going to fire up your sex life so much that you won't know left from right. Your love relationship is your special resource that aids your sexual relationship. I just ended another session of cyber sex with the same girl previously and again she masturbated and enjoyed herself. This fantasy between me and her is just beginning.
Now let's say your man makes a comment on a sexy outfit you both saw in a magazine. He's probably imagining the girl not the clothes but don't be offended. Take it as a opportunity to fill his desires. Find a way to get that outfit or like it and role play what he wants. If a women is checking out a guy dancing she may imagine herself as the seductive partner. Make your own teasing dance when you get home. Don't go blowing up and arguing about what she was looking at and why she's interested in the guy. That all doesn't make any sense and your role playing fantasies is short lived.
Even watching porn together, and I'm not suggesting anything illegal, will help both partners experiment with things that one may not have known about or was unwilling to do. Sometimes it may backfire as pain may be involved. Do what you're comfortable with. Illustrated books can also help. The Karma Sutra has been around a long time. There are things in there that you never even heard of, tried or did. Discussing the most erotic fantasies could also put you on the path to some juicy sex.
Anything to do with more than the two of you, for example threesomes or more, is entirely between the two of you. This I advise against if there isn't strong trust between both partners. Many a time one will accuse the other of doing things with someone else without them present. If you're into this sort of thing it is always best to be with the other present. If the bonds of trust are broken it's doomed. Listen here. If you're getting the permission to be with another person sexually in the presents of your partner why do you need to sneak of with someone alone? This is the life of swingers but I'll get into that another time
Having these secret fantasies come true will make you and your partner have a better sex life. Nothing gets stale and people tend to stay together in the relationship a long time. Why go anywhere else? If you can't do it all the time maybe you can work it out to a point that both of you can do it once a week or fortnightly. Maybe you can take turns to address your partners fantasy that way there's anticipation when it comes to your week. All said and done if there's to much going on like work, then just have normal passionate sex. Making love to the person you love in a passionate sexual manner far outweighs any fantasy that's in peoples minds.
Bar advice. Sometimes staying away from each other sexually for a short time can build to a more eager anticipation. Playfulness and build up to the event will be a fantasy all on it's own.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Urges, cravings and desires
The funny thing about us human being is we have certain urges, cravings and desires on a daily basis. Sometimes it's just a fantasy that we play in our mind. Sometimes it's the urge to do something for a long time that we either haven't done before or just haven't done in a long time. Then there's desire. This, in most cases, are things that are more materialistic or sexual in need.
Men mostly desire a more seductive and beautiful girl. Never worrying if she's good in bed or not. They just want one. Women do want a nice looking guy but they also want a guy that can fill their bang with quality and not just quantity. Women want a nice environment for the seduction. A romantic location or setting to be in the mood. Nice conversation. Men, they just need a place to get it on. That's a big difference between the genders. One thinks with their heart the other with their head, and I don't mean the one on their shoulders. I'll let you figure out which is which.
Just like a pregnant women graving for ice cream or sweet corn or whatever, the thought sticks in the head for a long time. It fades in and out of the mind but the crave will still be there till it's been satisfied. Only unless it's totally unobtainable will they let it go. Sometimes we get a crush, normally women, on someone. We want to be with them or at least be known to them. If there's acknowledgement from the one they have the crush on, their feed for the grave would have been met. They'll be able to get on with their live and be content. Guys don't normally have crushes but when they like a beautiful girl they are overjoyed just by the girl's greeting or even a single smile in their direction. A guy just feels like part of the world at that moment. It's one of those funny guy things.
We can't live without sex or can we? That's another part of the urges, cravings and desires. It's scientific fact that people have some sort of sexual thoughts in their daily lives. You can be having the worse day in their lives and yet. pop, a sexual thought of someone or something will enter their mind from out of nowhere. Fantasy role playing, lustful thoughts, surfing porn, magazines(not even necessarily dirty ones), in conversations, people watching and so on add to our secret desires of the human mind. That's all it really is we're built in that way since the dawn of time. It's just that society has changed but not the cravings of the mind. If we could we would all be naked chasing after the ones we like most in the jungles. In the urban jungle of today we do it with tools like the Internet and personal ads.
The other day I was on the messenger service. Getting to know a girl and after several hours of conversation, and things heating up, we got into the whole cyber sex thing. It was fun. We had a good time. Her mostly as I had a lot of finger work to do and I don't mean on her body but on the computer keys. It's a lot of quick typing to get the messages out fast. When you got a horny girl on the receiving end you have to be fast. She typed some back but later she told me that she was playing with herself. It took me by surprised but to hear that she masturbated, got all wet and did cum, was pleasing to think that I was part of the sexual fantasy that fulfill her needs and desires at that moment. I felt good as well after she told me. I actually felt like we had sex and that I was having after sex conversation with her. By the way guys, after sex conversation is a crucial follow up step in real sex especially. Women want to hear from you. Being quiet will make her feel and think there's something wrong.
These cravings, urges and desires add fuel to the fire of our fantasies. The fact that we all want them to be fulfilled probably can't happen. This is because every time we add more of these desires and cravings in our minds that it just doesn't stop. People that get older are looking with their minds through the eyes that feel young but bodies are a little aged but it doesn't stop them from thinking these thoughts or feeling what they feel. We all got to age but as we do we try to fill all the gaps of our imagination or needs. We can all preform. We just need the right place and person.
Bar advice. Live the life you can and fill all desires even if it's as simple as Internet cyber sex. Don't forget these urges, cravings and desire are the normal human characteristics as our forefathers.
Men mostly desire a more seductive and beautiful girl. Never worrying if she's good in bed or not. They just want one. Women do want a nice looking guy but they also want a guy that can fill their bang with quality and not just quantity. Women want a nice environment for the seduction. A romantic location or setting to be in the mood. Nice conversation. Men, they just need a place to get it on. That's a big difference between the genders. One thinks with their heart the other with their head, and I don't mean the one on their shoulders. I'll let you figure out which is which.
Just like a pregnant women graving for ice cream or sweet corn or whatever, the thought sticks in the head for a long time. It fades in and out of the mind but the crave will still be there till it's been satisfied. Only unless it's totally unobtainable will they let it go. Sometimes we get a crush, normally women, on someone. We want to be with them or at least be known to them. If there's acknowledgement from the one they have the crush on, their feed for the grave would have been met. They'll be able to get on with their live and be content. Guys don't normally have crushes but when they like a beautiful girl they are overjoyed just by the girl's greeting or even a single smile in their direction. A guy just feels like part of the world at that moment. It's one of those funny guy things.
We can't live without sex or can we? That's another part of the urges, cravings and desires. It's scientific fact that people have some sort of sexual thoughts in their daily lives. You can be having the worse day in their lives and yet. pop, a sexual thought of someone or something will enter their mind from out of nowhere. Fantasy role playing, lustful thoughts, surfing porn, magazines(not even necessarily dirty ones), in conversations, people watching and so on add to our secret desires of the human mind. That's all it really is we're built in that way since the dawn of time. It's just that society has changed but not the cravings of the mind. If we could we would all be naked chasing after the ones we like most in the jungles. In the urban jungle of today we do it with tools like the Internet and personal ads.
The other day I was on the messenger service. Getting to know a girl and after several hours of conversation, and things heating up, we got into the whole cyber sex thing. It was fun. We had a good time. Her mostly as I had a lot of finger work to do and I don't mean on her body but on the computer keys. It's a lot of quick typing to get the messages out fast. When you got a horny girl on the receiving end you have to be fast. She typed some back but later she told me that she was playing with herself. It took me by surprised but to hear that she masturbated, got all wet and did cum, was pleasing to think that I was part of the sexual fantasy that fulfill her needs and desires at that moment. I felt good as well after she told me. I actually felt like we had sex and that I was having after sex conversation with her. By the way guys, after sex conversation is a crucial follow up step in real sex especially. Women want to hear from you. Being quiet will make her feel and think there's something wrong.
These cravings, urges and desires add fuel to the fire of our fantasies. The fact that we all want them to be fulfilled probably can't happen. This is because every time we add more of these desires and cravings in our minds that it just doesn't stop. People that get older are looking with their minds through the eyes that feel young but bodies are a little aged but it doesn't stop them from thinking these thoughts or feeling what they feel. We all got to age but as we do we try to fill all the gaps of our imagination or needs. We can all preform. We just need the right place and person.
Bar advice. Live the life you can and fill all desires even if it's as simple as Internet cyber sex. Don't forget these urges, cravings and desire are the normal human characteristics as our forefathers.
Jungle fever
What does it take for someone to see beyond the colour. The race and the backgrounds. The social standings. The religion. We live in a society, or should I say world, that frowns on interracial marriages or togetherness. Even today it is sometimes difficult and not accepted.
To change the mindset of others is hard but those that are lying in the same familiar bed of loneliness look at people differently. If anyone saw the movie Jungle fever they would know that love doesn't see all the boundaries that people place in this world. When one finds that someone special in life who is it that has the right to stop you. People don't just go out looking for someone different than them. It just happens.
This may cause people to look at them differently. Make nasty remarks. Cause problems. Even abuse. Why do people have to act this way? Wouldn't it be better if people could just change. In India the caste system that's been around looks like it's long gone but people still behave intolerantly at those of a lower status. In Muslim countries they don't accept even those that are of different ethnic backgrounds. The shame of it all.
My sister had a Muslim girlfriend that married a Hindu husband but the family rejected her. She was banished from her home and family. That's the Muslim way. Today she's well and has two kids and the husband takes care of all of them. A loss for her original family. This happens all over the world and with all sorts of obstacles for those just looking for love. Imagine what it would be like if there was more acceptance and understanding from families, people and society.
Recently I got to know this girl that's Chinese and she's been in relationships that didn't work out. She's been to the US and said she's been with Thai, American and British guys. Now she's back and seems to be looking, after a recent break up with a local boyfriend, for someone special. It may be age or loneliness but it may just be a case of not finding the right one and the right one may not be the normal stream of things or persons. I haven't met her as yet but she seems to like the blog and all that I got to say in it.
Jungle love is the coming together of people that are different. Finding solace in the arms of someone that others may look upon as odd or wrong but it doesn't mean it is. We all just want to know that we are cared for. Will someone be there to hold your hand if you're sick? Will you be alone till death? Is there someone that can love you more unconditionally than the house dog? Don't you also deserve to have what you see others having everyday. Sure, you may not be able to have kids or do certain things like pole dancing but you get the joy of the another human being loving you back. No it's not hard to be open to the possibility that you can find love elsewhere. That's just the point. Be more open. Do not and I stress again, do not care what others say.
This is your life. No one else, not parents, friends of strangers are suppose to stop you from finding true love and happiness. Fight for what your heart desires. The more people see this happening the more people will change. In fact you may surprise yourself when you find that you see life in the many different ways that you never thought possible. Opening your heart to a different sort of person is just the same as anyone else. Also, the person you're with has also got to have the same moral values and is proud to be in the relationship with you. Working things out and ironing out the issues of your relationship will bring you closer together. Making errors is part of it but acceptance of each others differences is what will mould and eventually become the bond. Strengthening it and will break others that ridicule both of you.
For all those that are ready to take the chance, jump in with both feet, go for it. Make the decision to take your life into your own hands. There should be no such thing as being too young, not making the right choice or being in a mid life crisis that should stop you. Make hay when the sun shines is the saying so do just that. What's holding you back when you can see that at the end of the tunnel there's the most beautiful rainbow that can fulfill you?
Bar Advice. It will be difficult but than again life is for everyone. Why should yours be any different? But it can be done.
To change the mindset of others is hard but those that are lying in the same familiar bed of loneliness look at people differently. If anyone saw the movie Jungle fever they would know that love doesn't see all the boundaries that people place in this world. When one finds that someone special in life who is it that has the right to stop you. People don't just go out looking for someone different than them. It just happens.
This may cause people to look at them differently. Make nasty remarks. Cause problems. Even abuse. Why do people have to act this way? Wouldn't it be better if people could just change. In India the caste system that's been around looks like it's long gone but people still behave intolerantly at those of a lower status. In Muslim countries they don't accept even those that are of different ethnic backgrounds. The shame of it all.
My sister had a Muslim girlfriend that married a Hindu husband but the family rejected her. She was banished from her home and family. That's the Muslim way. Today she's well and has two kids and the husband takes care of all of them. A loss for her original family. This happens all over the world and with all sorts of obstacles for those just looking for love. Imagine what it would be like if there was more acceptance and understanding from families, people and society.
Recently I got to know this girl that's Chinese and she's been in relationships that didn't work out. She's been to the US and said she's been with Thai, American and British guys. Now she's back and seems to be looking, after a recent break up with a local boyfriend, for someone special. It may be age or loneliness but it may just be a case of not finding the right one and the right one may not be the normal stream of things or persons. I haven't met her as yet but she seems to like the blog and all that I got to say in it.
Jungle love is the coming together of people that are different. Finding solace in the arms of someone that others may look upon as odd or wrong but it doesn't mean it is. We all just want to know that we are cared for. Will someone be there to hold your hand if you're sick? Will you be alone till death? Is there someone that can love you more unconditionally than the house dog? Don't you also deserve to have what you see others having everyday. Sure, you may not be able to have kids or do certain things like pole dancing but you get the joy of the another human being loving you back. No it's not hard to be open to the possibility that you can find love elsewhere. That's just the point. Be more open. Do not and I stress again, do not care what others say.
This is your life. No one else, not parents, friends of strangers are suppose to stop you from finding true love and happiness. Fight for what your heart desires. The more people see this happening the more people will change. In fact you may surprise yourself when you find that you see life in the many different ways that you never thought possible. Opening your heart to a different sort of person is just the same as anyone else. Also, the person you're with has also got to have the same moral values and is proud to be in the relationship with you. Working things out and ironing out the issues of your relationship will bring you closer together. Making errors is part of it but acceptance of each others differences is what will mould and eventually become the bond. Strengthening it and will break others that ridicule both of you.
For all those that are ready to take the chance, jump in with both feet, go for it. Make the decision to take your life into your own hands. There should be no such thing as being too young, not making the right choice or being in a mid life crisis that should stop you. Make hay when the sun shines is the saying so do just that. What's holding you back when you can see that at the end of the tunnel there's the most beautiful rainbow that can fulfill you?
Bar Advice. It will be difficult but than again life is for everyone. Why should yours be any different? But it can be done.
Saturday, December 1, 2007
Guys. Don't be boring
Don't be BORING! There is no greater sin when you're trying to attract a beautiful women. In fact, this is the number one cause of "nice guys". It's not that women don't like nice guys. They do but oftentimes those types have some sincerity in them but it's just that nice guys aren't exciting. They're predictable to the girl. That's why they, often times, like those with the bad boy image but are really nice guys as well. Get the point?
I don't expect you to go out and buy a leather jacket or ride a Harley Davidson motorbike or even become a karate champion. Sometimes being who you are but making yourself to be a little more cool in her eyes is the key. It works for geeks like Bill gates, sure, if you have a bank account larger than the economies of some countries. Then again, Bill gates personifies a sense of being cool in his own way because he did what nobody around the world has done. This gives him an image of iconic proportions so the competition is zero. Women do look up to him and they want to be in his inner circle.
This is something that you need to be doing as well. Make them want to be near you. Her heart is seeking adventure. she wants to be swept off her feet. Now, this doesn't mean that you have to go bull riding or bungee jumping on a first date, but it does mean you can't be predictable. You can't be bland because that path is so obvious. She'll know what you'll say and do five minutes before you do it. Guys, how long can you watch a painfully formulaic movie before getting annoyed, especially if there aren't any explosions? She needs you to stir her life up a little and let's face it almost everyone will pick exciting over pleasant any time.
Now, jerks aren't pleasant people. She won't like that. This isn't a positive, in fact, it's the reason jerks rarely find themselves in long term or stable relationships but what jerks are; is unpredictable. Women will go out with them but in the end they'll be dumped as well. The important thing is to be unpredictable but not be a jerk to her or her friends. I don't know about you, but my aim in life has never been to be an abusive asshole. Even when I was younger I recognized that guys that were pricks got more women than they should, and that I would probably increase my success by following that pattern but I couldn't bring myself to do it. Deep down, most of us are nice guys. Tell you a secret. Lots of guys that have a bad boy image, deep down inside are in fact nice guys.
They sometimes prevail this image to women so in the event that things go wrong they can walk away with their heads held high although their little hearts are broken. They don't show their vulnerability but if a woman has been with a that guy for some time she will discover the real him. She'll love him even more that she actually has the good guy that she's always wanted and didn't realize.
Another tactic is what is called the delay method. If the women wants to go and have sushi, don't take her there on that night. Wait a week or so then bring her. You gain points for listening and thoughtfulness. If she's been talking about going to a certain place, eventually bring her there but do it with an element of surprise. She'll be all the more excited to go. Guys sometimes have a tendency to slip up and do everything that she ask. Advice here is don't be giving in even if she's whining about it. There may be the exception if you also want the same thing and you think it will move you ahead in the relationship.
By the way, delay, it counts about a thousand fold when it comes to sex. Few things are sexier than a man who doesn't lose it at the sight of an exposed breast. Don't make her think that her tits were the first lumps you've ever seen apart from Playboy magazine. If you can control yourself and delay satisfaction until you're ready to give it, the anticipation becomes more powerful than act alone and making the act all the more powerful when it happens. Yes, I'm still talking about sex but I'm talking about all the rest of it too. Trust me the "delay" game works.
Bar advice. Guys should find ways to improve themselves and not appear boring. One idea is to picture a role model as a muse to the change and try to emulate him. Most importantly find out what women are looking for.
I don't expect you to go out and buy a leather jacket or ride a Harley Davidson motorbike or even become a karate champion. Sometimes being who you are but making yourself to be a little more cool in her eyes is the key. It works for geeks like Bill gates, sure, if you have a bank account larger than the economies of some countries. Then again, Bill gates personifies a sense of being cool in his own way because he did what nobody around the world has done. This gives him an image of iconic proportions so the competition is zero. Women do look up to him and they want to be in his inner circle.
This is something that you need to be doing as well. Make them want to be near you. Her heart is seeking adventure. she wants to be swept off her feet. Now, this doesn't mean that you have to go bull riding or bungee jumping on a first date, but it does mean you can't be predictable. You can't be bland because that path is so obvious. She'll know what you'll say and do five minutes before you do it. Guys, how long can you watch a painfully formulaic movie before getting annoyed, especially if there aren't any explosions? She needs you to stir her life up a little and let's face it almost everyone will pick exciting over pleasant any time.
Now, jerks aren't pleasant people. She won't like that. This isn't a positive, in fact, it's the reason jerks rarely find themselves in long term or stable relationships but what jerks are; is unpredictable. Women will go out with them but in the end they'll be dumped as well. The important thing is to be unpredictable but not be a jerk to her or her friends. I don't know about you, but my aim in life has never been to be an abusive asshole. Even when I was younger I recognized that guys that were pricks got more women than they should, and that I would probably increase my success by following that pattern but I couldn't bring myself to do it. Deep down, most of us are nice guys. Tell you a secret. Lots of guys that have a bad boy image, deep down inside are in fact nice guys.
They sometimes prevail this image to women so in the event that things go wrong they can walk away with their heads held high although their little hearts are broken. They don't show their vulnerability but if a woman has been with a that guy for some time she will discover the real him. She'll love him even more that she actually has the good guy that she's always wanted and didn't realize.
Another tactic is what is called the delay method. If the women wants to go and have sushi, don't take her there on that night. Wait a week or so then bring her. You gain points for listening and thoughtfulness. If she's been talking about going to a certain place, eventually bring her there but do it with an element of surprise. She'll be all the more excited to go. Guys sometimes have a tendency to slip up and do everything that she ask. Advice here is don't be giving in even if she's whining about it. There may be the exception if you also want the same thing and you think it will move you ahead in the relationship.
By the way, delay, it counts about a thousand fold when it comes to sex. Few things are sexier than a man who doesn't lose it at the sight of an exposed breast. Don't make her think that her tits were the first lumps you've ever seen apart from Playboy magazine. If you can control yourself and delay satisfaction until you're ready to give it, the anticipation becomes more powerful than act alone and making the act all the more powerful when it happens. Yes, I'm still talking about sex but I'm talking about all the rest of it too. Trust me the "delay" game works.
Bar advice. Guys should find ways to improve themselves and not appear boring. One idea is to picture a role model as a muse to the change and try to emulate him. Most importantly find out what women are looking for.
Dating from a online website
I recently went check out this online dating website. I won't mention it but I got to say it was the only one that I know that allowed gold members to message standard members and vice-verse. found that out later on though. I actually found it as part of the junk mail and spam that we all get. Anyway I went to check it out. Joined as a standard member a went to search. It wasn't all that great a site but had some nice looking members.
With all the relationship advice that I write here, never did I think that I would actually be browsing the site as much. Probably because after closing down the bar I had more time on my hands. Then, I came a cross Angela. Her picture is what really caught my eye. red dress and all. Found out that I could message her because she was a gold member, so I did. We went back and forth a bit and finally got our emails exchanged. Then started to get on MSN messenger.
The first time we were on it was a bit of a disaster. She didn't seem to like what I was saying. I was already on first before she got on so to me it seemed that she was preoccupied with doing other things rather than have a chat with me. The conversation didn't rally go all that smooth. Me trying to be cool and all. I never really had difficulties with getting to know someone when you already know them a little. Know what I mean? She seemed like a dodo bird to me on certain things but she didn't like one or two jokes I made or remarks. I had to apologize to keep her pleased. I was actually just testing waters to see what sort of chick this was. Then I find out she's a Taurian/Snake. All hell was about to break loose.
This is what I know about a Taurus/Snake.
THE SLITHERING STOIC
This is the most natural of Snakes. Snake people often display cosmic leanings and cleave to the other worldly. Taurus grounds them. This Snake will be intuitive (as usual), yet wonderfully discreet. The Taurus part of the character will lend earthiness. This wildly attractive creature causes havoc among members of the opposite(or same for that matter)sex. People cannot control their desire to be controlled by this marvelously sensual type whose alluring bedside manner is almost as dangerous in as it is out of bed. The steamy sexual reputation of this cool, yet earthy creature is legendary. When a Taurean born Snake wraps itself around a sex partner, the victim has absolutely no chance of(nor any desire for)escape.
Once I read this, my first thoughts was, how can I get those legs to wrap around me. I started to get more queries about this feline. Just by looking at her picture on the website and our messages I could get the sense that this one was the type that played it cool and waited for the proper time and approach. She was typical of a real snake that would be willing to just sit there and be admired of her beauty by all but only engage when she wanted to. When we got together on messenger again it wasn't as bad and seemed less hostile than the first encounter. I felt like Steve Irwin, the crocodile hunter, here. It ended with a stoic response to goodnight that I thought it was doomed.
At the end of the week somehow she got online really late. About 1am. We were back and forth about a lot of things. She opened up brilliantly. I never had a better conversation with her. I guess it's because snakes naturally like it better in the night. We had frank exchanges and I hoped that we both understood each other a little better. We were online for several hours. I even found out that her dad was a ex-cop. We joked about him shooting me. Probably in deep water now though.
Anyway, I tried to make her see the actual me and really tried to figure her out. I was feeding her info about the man I was and what I was all about. She did the same but in lesser info than I would like to have had. One should know that two people trying to get a relationship started takes a small step at a time but sometimes you need to be bold and move faster a little. At times this may not be the right move because a woman tends to feel a little hurried into the relationship and may just abruptly end it all then and there before it can even begin. Naturally snakes will rather have a less confrontational approach to anything. In a way it worked out. I wasn't going to tell he about the blog. In fact I didn't write anything till now because I told her I was going to do so. This sought of caught her off guard and now she might be reading this.
I think she just wants to kill me at this point for all this stuff written here but I got to do this. All the blog items I wrote may actually help her out. I sense that she's the sort that needs a little coaxing to come out. Maybe she need a little more time. Maybe she's doesn't feel as ready as she would like to be. Bottom line is we both haven't met. A one time meeting could make or breaking a relationship. I already told her if it didn't work out, hopefully we could be friends. It really will come down to what a person wants. Initially I told her that I wanted to be a bit more mysterious and take things slow but just getting to know each other online but, hey, Christmas is coming.
Here's a bit of advice to those that do online dating. The websites are there to help connect people and it's better and faster to find someone. Some are online with different intentions and false information. Others are branded the same even when they are innocent. One individual is different from another. Having previous boy or girlfriends cannot cloud your judgement of someone new. Don't make the same wrong moves that got you here in the first place. Don't judge others the same way. Trying not to look desperate and acting uninterested will get you nowhere. Opening up to the possibilities that the universe can bring you a partner in life, even after all the hurt before, is what you may find at the end of the rainbow of your dreams.
Bar advice. Take a chance. Not everything comes in the package that you wanted, desired or wished for. Sometimes it's a little old, broken, damaged, discarded or in pieces. Can you be the glue to fix it?
With all the relationship advice that I write here, never did I think that I would actually be browsing the site as much. Probably because after closing down the bar I had more time on my hands. Then, I came a cross Angela. Her picture is what really caught my eye. red dress and all. Found out that I could message her because she was a gold member, so I did. We went back and forth a bit and finally got our emails exchanged. Then started to get on MSN messenger.
The first time we were on it was a bit of a disaster. She didn't seem to like what I was saying. I was already on first before she got on so to me it seemed that she was preoccupied with doing other things rather than have a chat with me. The conversation didn't rally go all that smooth. Me trying to be cool and all. I never really had difficulties with getting to know someone when you already know them a little. Know what I mean? She seemed like a dodo bird to me on certain things but she didn't like one or two jokes I made or remarks. I had to apologize to keep her pleased. I was actually just testing waters to see what sort of chick this was. Then I find out she's a Taurian/Snake. All hell was about to break loose.
This is what I know about a Taurus/Snake.
THE SLITHERING STOIC
This is the most natural of Snakes. Snake people often display cosmic leanings and cleave to the other worldly. Taurus grounds them. This Snake will be intuitive (as usual), yet wonderfully discreet. The Taurus part of the character will lend earthiness. This wildly attractive creature causes havoc among members of the opposite(or same for that matter)sex. People cannot control their desire to be controlled by this marvelously sensual type whose alluring bedside manner is almost as dangerous in as it is out of bed. The steamy sexual reputation of this cool, yet earthy creature is legendary. When a Taurean born Snake wraps itself around a sex partner, the victim has absolutely no chance of(nor any desire for)escape.
Once I read this, my first thoughts was, how can I get those legs to wrap around me. I started to get more queries about this feline. Just by looking at her picture on the website and our messages I could get the sense that this one was the type that played it cool and waited for the proper time and approach. She was typical of a real snake that would be willing to just sit there and be admired of her beauty by all but only engage when she wanted to. When we got together on messenger again it wasn't as bad and seemed less hostile than the first encounter. I felt like Steve Irwin, the crocodile hunter, here. It ended with a stoic response to goodnight that I thought it was doomed.
At the end of the week somehow she got online really late. About 1am. We were back and forth about a lot of things. She opened up brilliantly. I never had a better conversation with her. I guess it's because snakes naturally like it better in the night. We had frank exchanges and I hoped that we both understood each other a little better. We were online for several hours. I even found out that her dad was a ex-cop. We joked about him shooting me. Probably in deep water now though.
Anyway, I tried to make her see the actual me and really tried to figure her out. I was feeding her info about the man I was and what I was all about. She did the same but in lesser info than I would like to have had. One should know that two people trying to get a relationship started takes a small step at a time but sometimes you need to be bold and move faster a little. At times this may not be the right move because a woman tends to feel a little hurried into the relationship and may just abruptly end it all then and there before it can even begin. Naturally snakes will rather have a less confrontational approach to anything. In a way it worked out. I wasn't going to tell he about the blog. In fact I didn't write anything till now because I told her I was going to do so. This sought of caught her off guard and now she might be reading this.
I think she just wants to kill me at this point for all this stuff written here but I got to do this. All the blog items I wrote may actually help her out. I sense that she's the sort that needs a little coaxing to come out. Maybe she need a little more time. Maybe she's doesn't feel as ready as she would like to be. Bottom line is we both haven't met. A one time meeting could make or breaking a relationship. I already told her if it didn't work out, hopefully we could be friends. It really will come down to what a person wants. Initially I told her that I wanted to be a bit more mysterious and take things slow but just getting to know each other online but, hey, Christmas is coming.
Here's a bit of advice to those that do online dating. The websites are there to help connect people and it's better and faster to find someone. Some are online with different intentions and false information. Others are branded the same even when they are innocent. One individual is different from another. Having previous boy or girlfriends cannot cloud your judgement of someone new. Don't make the same wrong moves that got you here in the first place. Don't judge others the same way. Trying not to look desperate and acting uninterested will get you nowhere. Opening up to the possibilities that the universe can bring you a partner in life, even after all the hurt before, is what you may find at the end of the rainbow of your dreams.
Bar advice. Take a chance. Not everything comes in the package that you wanted, desired or wished for. Sometimes it's a little old, broken, damaged, discarded or in pieces. Can you be the glue to fix it?
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