A friend

A Friend....
(A)ccepts you as you are
(B)elieves in "you"
(C)alls you just to say "HI"
(D)oesn't give up on you
(E)nvisions the whole of you (even the unfinished parts)
(F)orgives your mistakes
(G)ives unconditionally
(H)elps you
(I)nvites you over
(J)ust "be" with you
(K)eeps you close at heart
(L)oves you for who you are
(M)akes a difference in your life
(N)ever Judges
(O)ffer support
(P)icks you up
(Q)uiets your fears
(R)aises your spirits
(S)ays nice things about you
(T)ells you the "real" truth unlike other people
(U)nderstands you
(V)alues you
(W)alks beside you
(X)-plains thing you don't understand
(Y)ells when you won't listen and
(Z)aps you back to reality

Bar advice. What sort of friends do you have in your life? If you got someone with these qualities, stick with them.

Respect the breast

Coconuts, hooters, honkers, udders, melons, fun-bags are some of the names. I think we all know(and love) what we’re talking about here. Hardly a breast goes by that any normal man doesn't admire but how many men truly know how to respect the breast?

Breast respect scores huge points with women, so whether you are a moderate fan or a die hard addict it’s time to learn how to better respect the breast. Few men go through life without alarming women with strange attitudes or actions towards their breasts. A woman’s breasts hold unbelievable power. There are both physically and symbolically significant to both sexes, and therefore must be treated appropriately. Women hold different impressions of their own mammories. Some are too small, too large, too droopy, uneven and all others but in the end the same rules apply to men the world over when it comes to every type, size and shape of breast. Treat it with respect. So how do you go about respecting the breast while having a mind blowing sexual encounter with a woman?

There are a few guidelines to follow that will help you to drive a woman mad with pleasure at the same time as you show her most prestigious body part the respect that it deserves. First of all you must remember that breasts are not a child’s play toy. They are, however, very much a play toy for adults. As such, breasts must be played with in a fun, stimulating and sensual adult manner. They are not, on the other hand, to be treated as your long lost preschool toy.

For example, as much as she might laugh as you refer to them as hooters, there is no need to go around "hooting" at them on a daily basis. They are not attached to the handlebars of your bike or the steering wheel of your car. You are a grown man, so only if you really must hoot once and end it. Tuning nipples as if there are knobs of your car radio will also grow old very quickly with women, so tune the nipple-knob dial sparingly if you hope to spend any more time with her. It is also very important to pay attention to your pressure and touch when it comes to breast respect. Women’s breasts feel differently at different times of the month, depending on hormones and cycles.

While one girl might love it when you squeeze her breasts together with great pressure, the next one might find it mildly painful or uncomfortable. Alternately, the same woman might love soft biting and pinching majority of the time but they cringe at it if her breasts are in a more sensitive condition around “that” time of the month. Know what I mean? Since you can never really be sure as to what a woman’s preference for pressure and touch will be at any given time, it is always a good idea to start with light pressure and a soft touch. Once you can sense her pleasure and enjoyment increase the weight of your touch. If you are lucky, she will want you to build up to the satisfying squeezing that will make your sexual encounter all the more enjoyable for you both.

When if comes to breast respect, you must always remember that those lovely orbs are always to be treated as a compliment not a detriment to your encounter. Whether they are small or large, be sensitive to them at all times. This includes the nipples size, shape and colour. A woman’s breasts are different than a man’s in that they can be used in so many different ways. By enjoying them to their fullest advantage, you are paying respect to the breasts and their owner. If you are party to a medium or large sized breast, you might engage with them "Spanish" style, where you have her squeeze them together and create a pleasurable bosom tunnel for your manhood. To make it even more enjoyable, you might introduce lubricant into the encounter. You are guaranteed to enjoy this but remember to gauge her interest and enjoyment as well. If she is a smaller sized woman, encourage her to go on top. As she leans over they will form cleavage that will be much more enjoyable than when she is on her back.

What if you have said and done all the right things, but you sense that she is just not into enjoying her breasts as much as you are? Chances are its from one of two things. The first may be insecurity. Whether she thinks they are too small or large, the only thing you can do to reassure her is to tell her that they are fabulous, and just the right size. Sometimes you find women who are conscious of her breast will only reveal them in the dark. The other reason she might be hesitant about making the most of her breast, is because she has not done so before. If she is used to being with men who don’t respect the breast and who are simply obsessed with booty, then she is likely inexperienced with getting her breasts heavily involved in the sexual encounter. The lack of men stimulating her arousal by playing with the breast is lacking in this case.

Take it slow and keep it sensual, and she will likely grow into the pleasure of her own breasts. On a more general note, remember to pay breasts their due respect in all environments both inside and outside the bedroom. Maybe the secretary in your office has a great set of hooters. Sure you can pass a glance at them every so often, but do not stare at them or look at them when you are talking to her. This will quickly get you labeled the office pervert. If you must take a glance, compliment her sweater and move on. She knows you're looking but she wants them admired not ogled at. When it comes to meeting new people the same rule applies.

Say you are hitting on a woman at the bar with the most scrumptious breasts that you have ever seen. Tell her that she has a beautiful body and take the conversation elsewhere. If she thinks that you are only interested in her breasts, which may very well be the case, she will likely shut you down. Treat those great hooters as part of a great package and you will win her over, and hopefully have her over, in no time. A woman’s breasts are the closest thing to her heart so respect them at all times. The respect will be returned to you in the finest way known to man.

Bar advice. Cleavage seen is an indicator that she's loves what she's got. Is not afraid to flaunt it but is willing to only give it to the one that respects it.

Sweet jazz and all lovers

The ultimate collection of late night, mood-setting jazz, featuring classic performances by Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Diana Krall, Tony Bennett, Duke Ellington, Ella Fitzgerald, Billie Holiday and many more Jazz greats! Playboy Jazz label is great.

An all-star program of great jazz standards provides the listener(or participant) with hours of fine and dulcet music. Program commentary and track personnel are included. For all lovers of sweet jazz and all lovers.

Bar advice. Ironically even Playboy knows that lovers love jazz. It's a nice soothing tone to any occasion especially if you're making love.

The formula that many girls use to control guys

What is this formula? Lets look at some of what girls do and why. Meet the behaviorist.With these "behaviorist" type girls, I'm about to explain about, it's a constant manipulation that never ends until they get bored or you get wise. By the way, if I sound too harsh with all of this revenge talk, don't worry. One of two things will happen when you learn the secret to pulling yourself out of the "behaviorists" clutches.

When she misses out on a nice guy like you either she'll find another chump(or several more) to replace you or maybe she'll realize that she wants to drop the BS and hey, maybe she just missed out on something great(you) and she better shape up before she misses out again. The ironic thing here is that guys and girls can be behaviorists. Lets see what I mean.

"Behaviorists" more often than not learned how manipulation works inside and out by gaming their fathers( mothers for guys) for attention. How can you tell if she's a behaviorist type girl? It's actually pretty simple. Though you do need a little bit of information about her to figure it out. Here's the test.

If a girl seems to like you, find out why(do this directly by asking and also indirectly by noticing clues). There are two kinds of "answers" that she can give. Here's the test.

Answer for girl type #1. "The way you *behave* makes me happy."
Examples of this would be. "You gave me one of the happiest days of my life, I spend time with you, that should tell you how I feel about you, because new years was so much fun, because I like the way you look and dress."

Answer for girl type #2. "I admire certain qualities about you."
Examples would be, "Because you're intelligent, because you're kind and I feel safe around you, because I find you're good looking, because you're so respectful of people, because you're a good man."

Now lets do the self test. Have you already guessed which girl type you should turn tail and run as soon as you identify? Before I tell you, let me give you a little bit of the psychology behind what's going on here, and maybe if you don't already have it, you'll get it before I spill the beans. Now, with the second type of girl, the quality girl, her motivation is going to be to encourage you to become smarter, kinder, more respectful and all around better in your qualities as a person. The first type, the behaviorist, that we're warning you about is motivated to direct your energies towards getting you to behave in the way that she likes. She operates on a reward/punishment type of plan with you. A girl who likes you for your qualities doesn't need to reward and punish you, but a girl who likes you for your behavior will think that she does. Yes, the first kind of girl in the example above is the type of girl to drop like a hot potato. As for the second, please don't tell me you can't figure it out.

Now, if these behaviorist type girls are made out as vampires, then where are their fangs? Empty promises of future value. With the behaviorist type girl the manipulation will almost always center around the hope that she'll follow through on some promise, spoken or implied. Really, that's how almost any con artist works, if you think about it. That doesn't mean she'll break every promise. Heck, you might even get sex sometimes but the pattern will be one of lies and half truths with a trail of broken promises.Here's an example from online dating.

The biggest trap when it comes to online dating is the virtual relationship. These can go on and on and they center around behaviorist type girls bilking you for what they want. A good buddy to chat with and the possibility of more but only if she wants it. There's always the promise that you'll get together and perhaps even a great degree of virtual intimacy but there's no payoff at least not one worth your time. It may not be all online dating site with girls like this but because there's so many it's hard to tell who is the 'real deal'.

Bottom line. Cut the behaviorist totally out of your life, including out of your thoughts and you will be way happier. Plus, then you'll actually be ready when the 'real-deal' girl comes by. This may sound like crazy advice for anybody else listening including but what you end up with in a behaviorist is a girl who doesn't love you at all. She just "loves" when you behave the way she likes. Once her premise is that of your behavior and not your personal qualities, are what makes her happy, then there's really nowhere else for her to turn but to conditioning your behavior.

When you identify a behaviorist, don't try to "beat" them or "get" them back, or find some value in them. Instead move pass. Don't hesitate and waste time. If another girl was already in your bed, you wouldn't care about the behaviorist, right? So, realize that right now, and forget about behaviorists immediately. You don't have to wait until you replace them. Besides, you'll be a lot more successful in finding the right replacement if your mind isn't all clouded with the wrong one.

Lastly. "Quality women" aren't at fault for the existence of so many behaviorist women that suck your life dry. As a matter of fact, they are probably more frustrated by the behaviorist women than you are. After all, it's not the quality girl's fault that she doesn't make the wild promises that a behaviorist will make. Which puts a genuine girl at a disadvantage unless you know how to appreciate that they are better for you. This is the formula that many girls use to control guys. Sad to say it but it's true but I know there's a lot of good women out there too. However, at least you guys are armed with some knoweledge.

Bar advice. Here's how I see it. A "7" who likes you for your qualities is really a "10" while a "10" who wants to control you is a "0"

In good times and bad before marriage and after

The saying is "opposites attract." So what happens to love faced with obstacles of dissimilar backgrounds, different belief systems or long distance love affairs? Does it signal impending doom of a lasting relationship? Major differences do have an impact on whether or not love will last, but the good news is there are things you can do to ensure you don't fall victim to circumstance no matter how intricate your situation.

Lets look at some differences. Conflicting beliefs need to be addressed, if only so lovers can better understand each other. Though no single difference can guarantee that the love won't work, let's face it, there are deal breakers. Lets take some examples like these. Do you want kids? Do you want to build a life in the city? Will you live in a house or an apartment? Do you like pets? At some point or another, it's important that you assess them. Remember, before you met the one you're involved with, they had a life with dreams of happiness and everlasting love. Will you be the one?

Lead with your heart not your past. Don't make the mistake of thinking that if you're in love, things that you've always held dear like religion, lifestyle, political beliefs or whatever you care about, won't really matter. Likewise, if long distance is cool for you now, but only for the short term, that also needs to be addressed. Naturally it's up to the two of you to decide what your non-negotiable key points are, but if you don't discuss them, it's not fair to harbor resentment later for the difference or disagreement.

An enourmous point is to be honest. Similarly, no relationship can transcend troubles without complete honesty though it may not seem like it in the early throes of love, even the simplest of situations will eventually encounter the occasional rocky patch. For this reason, and a list of others too long to name, it's vital that you tell your partner the truth about your feelings related to any potential conflicts, to avoid unnecessary hurt and unmet expectation in the future. This enables both partners to act from a place of honesty and trust, even in the face of adversity.If you're honest from the beginning and your partner sees the real you, it's better than to see it after the relationship goes on longer or worse still, be horified after marriage.

Singles that become couples must work as a team. One key component to overcoming obstacles and making love last and one that comes up far too infrequently in our individualistic culture, is that truly committed partners need to consider themselves a team. While they may not always agree and most certainly are not always right, they are each other's advocates. In good times and bad before marriage and after, knowing deep down that you can always count on your lover for a shoulder to cry on or as a cheerleader for your victories, is the glue that holds you together and one real way to help ensure all those differences don't really matter.

Bar advice. Communication is the vital relationship advice in good times and bad way before the marriage and after. You'll see a clearer and better life with your partner.

International Women's Day

ABOUT INTERNATIONAL WOMEN'S DAY

International Women's Day has been observed since in the early 1900's, a time of great expansion and turbulence in the industrialized world that saw booming population growth and the rise of radical ideologies.

1908
Great unrest and critical debate was occurring amongst women. Women's oppression and inequality was spurring women to become more vocal and active in campaigning for change. Then in 1908, 15000 women marched through New York City demanding shorter hours, better pay and voting rights.

1909
In accordance with a declaration by the Socialist Party of America, the first National Woman's Day (NWD) was observed across the United States on 28 February. Women continued to celebrate NWD on the last Sunday of February until 1913.

1910
At a Socialist International meeting in Copenhagen, an International Women's Day of no fixed date was proposed to honour the women's rights movement and to assist in achieving universal suffrage for women. Over a hundred women from seventeen countries unanimously agreed the proposal. Three of these women were later elected the first women to the Finnish parliament.

1911
Following the decision agreed at Copenhagen in 1911, International Women's Day (IWD) was honoured the first time in Austria, Denmark, Germany and Switzerland on 19 March. More than one million women and men attended IWD rallies campaigning for women's rights to work, vote, be trained, to hold public office and end discrimination. However less than a week later on 25 March, the tragic 'Triangle Fire' in New York City took the lives of more than 140 working women, most of them Italian and Jewish immigrants. This disastrous event drew significant attention to working conditions and labour legislation in the United States that became a focus of subsequent International Women's Day events. 1911 also saw women's 'Bread and Roses' campaign.

1913-1914
On the eve of World War I campaigning for peace, Russian women observed their first International Women's Day on the last Sunday in February 1913. In 1914 further women across Europe held rallies to campaign against the war and to express women's solidarity.

1917
On the last Sunday of February, Russian women began a strike for "bread and peace" in response to the death over two million Russian soldiers in war. Opposed by political leaders the women continued to strike until four days later the Czar was forced to abdicate and the provisional Government granted women the right to vote. The date the women's strike commenced was Sunday 23 February on the Julian calendar then in use in Russia. This day on the Gregorian calendar in use elsewhere was 8 March.

1918-1999
Since its birth in the socialist movement, International Women's Day has grown to become a global day of recognition and celebration across developed and developing countries alike. For decades, IWD has grown from strength to strength annually. For many years the United Nations has held an annual IWD conference to coordinate international efforts for women's rights and participation in social, political and economic processes. 1975 was designated as 'International Women’s Year' by the United Nations. Women's organisations and governments around the world have also observed IWD annually on 8 March by holding large scale events that honour women's advancement and while diligently reminding of the continued vigilance and action required to ensure that women's equality is gained and maintained in all aspects of life.

2000-2007
IWD is now an official holiday in Armenia, Russia, Azerbaijan, Belarus, Bulgaria, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Macedonia, Moldova, Mongolia, Tajikistan, Ukraine, Uzbekistan and Vietnam. The tradition sees men honouring their mothers, wives, girlfriends, colleagues, etc with flowers and small gifts. In some countries IWD has the equivalent status of Mother's Day where children give small presents to their mothers and grandmothers.

The new millennium has witnessed a significant change and attitudinal shift in both women's and society's thoughts about women's equality and emancipation. Many from a younger generation feel that 'all the battles have been won for women' while many feminists from the 1970's know only too well the longevity and ingrained complexity of patriarchy. With more women in the boardroom, greater equality in legislative rights, and an increased critical mass of women's visibility as impressive role models in every aspect of life, one could think that women have gained true equality. The unfortunate fact is that women are still not paid equally to that of their male counterparts, women still are not present in equal numbers in business or politics, and globally women's education, health and the violence against them is worse than that of men.

However, great improvements have been made. We do have female astronauts and prime ministers, school girls are welcomed into university, women can work and have a family, women have real choices. And so the tone and nature of IWD has, for the past few years, moved from being a reminder about the negatives to a celebration of the positives.

Annually on 8 March, thousands of events are held throughout the world to inspire women and celebrate their achievements. While there are many large scale initiatives, a rich and diverse fabric of local activity connects women from all around the world ranging from political rallies, business conferences, government activities and networking events through to local women's craft markets, theatric performances, fashion parades and more.

Many global corporations have also started to more actively support IWD by running their own internal events and through supporting external ones. For example, on 8 March search engine and media giant Google even changes its logo on its global search pages. Corporations like HSBC host the UK's largest and longest running IWD event delivered by women's company Aurora. Last year Nortel sponsored IWD activities in over twenty countries and thousands of women participated. Nortel continues to connect its global workforce though a coordinated program of high-level IWD activity, as does Accenture both virtually and offline.

Accenture supports more than 2,000 of its employees to participate in its International Women's Day activities that include leadership development sessions, career workshops and corporate citizenship events held across six continents - in eight cities in the United States and in Argentina, Australia, Brazil, Canada, Germany, India, Ireland, Italy, Japan, Spain, South Africa and the UK. Accenture also coordinated am IWD webcast featuring stories about Accenture women worldwide that ran uninterrupted for thirty hours across eleven time zones via Accenture's intranet. Year on year IWD is certainly increasing in status. The United States even designates the whole month of March as 'Women's History Month'.

So make a difference, think globally and act locally!! Make everyday International Women's Day. Do your bit to ensure that the future for girls is bright, equal, safe and rewarding.

Bar advice. Taken from http://www.internationalwomensday.com so go there to see videos and pictures from around the world. You ROCK girl!!

Being predictable

There is no greater sin than being boring when you're trying to attract beautiful women. In fact, this is the number one cause of nice guy, friend only. It's not that women don't like nice guys. Oftentimes the "let's just be friends" have some sincerity in them. It's that nice guys aren't exciting. They're predictable.

Let's face it, almost everyone will pick exciting over pleasant every time. Guys too. How many sites are set up devoted to the hotness of Pamela Anderson? How many are set up exalting the attributes of Jane Austen heroines? Have you ever even had the patience to finish a Jane Austen novel? I rest my case. Nice guys often wind up in this atrocious position where they do everything "right" and his object of affection wants to "like" him because there's just is no spark.

She wishes like hell she could fall for such a sweet man who would treat her as well as anyone but she just can't. Her head is all into you, but her heart is somewhere else. Possibly being a free spirit. Wanting her desires and sexual needs to be fulfilled. Her heart is seeking adventure. Now, this doesn't mean that you have to go mountain climbing or skydiving on a first date but it does mean you can't be predictable. You can't be bland and inoffensive because that path is so obvious she'll know what you'll say and do five minutes before you do it. How long can you watch a painfully formulated movie before getting annoyed especially if there aren't any explosions? Exactly.

Women do seek the trill of being swept off their feet by their handsome 'prince charming' but in reality very few actually will. They do feel at ease with someone less attractive by their side because the tendency for the man to leave her is low. Somehow you find that women, like on online dating sites, highlight the point that they are not worried about looks. This can be because she's either getting older, wants to feel secure that he won't be going off looking for another woman anytime soon or would not want to be in a jealous relationship and be miserable.

Guys looking to get into a better relationship with women should stop being predictable. Women have a intuition about men but if you do something out of the blue, extraordinarily or spontaneously; you throw them off the scent. They will see you differently. Their normal patterns start to change. Now they start to get excited. They look forward to seeing you, hearing your voice or meeting up again. After some time you'll find that she's willing to jump in the sack with you. However, I advise you not to. Why? If you grab the invitation too quickly you jump right back onto the 'normal' path of being predictable.

Bar advice. If you want to have some really good sex you really need to hold back first. I know it's hard but it will be worth it. Trust the unpredictability.

Social spheres

Guys, memorizing a few common openers when meeting girls and being prepared builds some confidence to "just do it" for those who constantly hesitate and, in doing so, their results will improve because they are at least doing something whereas before they did nothing. Hence, the perception of better results based on material when, in fact, at least for the beginner, the bigger impact comes from taking action versus not taking action.

Once you get over this hump and approaching girls are no longer issues, you will begin to feel the need to have a natural context for normal conversations to take place. When approaching women you need to focus on getting under the radar to get "in' faster and easier than what might otherwise be perceived as a "pickup". You may wonder why this is important. It is a subtlety that you won't hear about often because it requires the person to explain social context, especially the context of a typical woman's world and thought process. Most women who aren't normally promiscuous, especially when they're younger, see the world of meeting men as; through friends, being introduced or waiting until they are approached.

Still, even when a man approaches her, in the back of her mind she will later have to describe to her girlfriends and immediate social network how she met him. She does not want to be perceived as promiscuous(even if she is) and she, like many women, will need to feel validated. Unlike most men, most women know they can get just about any man to sleep with them if they just simply offer. It's the truth! This, however, is not the goal for them. The primary goal is to find a man who they are interested in, but there is a lot of pressure to also meet him through established "social spheres". Let's review some places of intimacy or familiarity that would meet, within a woman's social context or the notion of a "social sphere" that meets approval would be.
* Met at a respectable vacation resort
* Met at a location of mutual interest(museum, concert, etc)
* Met at a social club event(painting class, pottery, etc)
* Met at a private party(wedding, celebration, holiday, etc)
* Have a mutual friend(better still a parents friend)
* Involved in mutual activity (volunteering, hobby)
* Go to same school(university, management, etc)
* Work at same company(co-worker or client)

In contrast, those situations women will feel their friends,family, or co-workers might look upon negatively.
* Happen to be in same place, no context
* Met on the Internet
* Met in a bar or club
* Met on the street
* Met at random but common location (store, elevator,etc)

For women, at least if anything more than a secret fling is to occur, the means in which they meet must match their notion(and their friends' notions) of "social sphere". That is not to say the places that will have negative approval cannot be construed to be within a "social sphere" context. Only that upon initial reflection how such situations will be seen. I'll explain in a moment.

Guys, put yourself in places and situations where the women you meet will not hesitate based on a context that people they know will not look upon negatively. It's easier to meet women from within the context of social spheres or mutual interests than walking up to them as a literal stranger. The point here is to explain 'why' this is the case and with the knowledge of 'why' we can now get to the good stuff. How to still succeed in places and situations that would normally be stacked against you!

It is possible to get past context issues by playing with subtlety. Imagine approaching women within their social spheres as a "hot" approach and approaching her outside those circles as a"cold" approach. Then the way you look at this is to find an avenue for a middle ground to turn "cold" approaches into "warm" ones. You can also see warm approaches as possibly more positive for her because they allow her to pursue a relationship that, if doesn't go well, won't put the structure of her established social sphere into chaos. For example, if you meet a woman in a bookstore, you must find common ground of familiarity(same book section) and context to allow for what could be perceived as "social sphere". You can even bend the laws of logic to do so! So long as you can achieve attraction in the interaction. Context issues will not be a problem if you can have her perceive the meeting to be at least peripherally within her perception of her social sphere.

A girl in the foreign language section of the bookstore might be interested to learn a new language. For the context of that approach, so are you. That is your subtle context but that's not enough. There must be familiarity with something in the environment. In terms of conversation and interaction, this would be known as "rapport", but in terms of initiating to meet someone, it would be a shared element of the environment or a shared observation. In addition, opening this way allows you to quickly find a context of familiarity and rapport but, and this is a big but, you must not chase the rapport, but rather allow it to come about on its own through your lead.

With this style of warm approach, you utilize an observation of the environment around her to create your opener and deepen the connection to her social sphere by connecting the overall environment to a mutual interest or lifestyle or common connection. You may not come up with the greatest of openers your first few times but getting the swing of this style of approach actually gets you in deeper from the start. You must work on your powers of observation. To get you started, here is a list of things in her environment you can take notice of.
*Where you both are
*Something she is looking at
*Something she is wearing or using
*Something interesting in front of her
*Music which may be playing in the background
*Someone on TV(if there's one nearby)
*Some occasion in the country(national holiday, etc)

Once opened, pinpoint a common ground for you and her and during conversation reinforce(interpret) how this common ground connects the both of you and continue with the attraction skills that you know best. Remember that you are just getting to know someone that will be weary of you, your approach, your intentions and may have been hurt in the past. Take it slow guys. You need to breath as well.

Bar advice. The women also are assessing you so don't expect all doors to be opened. It doesn't work that way.