Hitch

What can be said about this movie. Those that watched it can relate to all three stars in the movie. The situation and delema of people starting out in a relationship.

Have we done things of this nature? Possibly. Will smith shows what it takes and what needs to be said to "get the girl". Well' he is the star of the movie but in reality we got to see that what he said is sometimes what guys really feel but just don't know how to go about it.

Here the scene is set with a phone call to get a date for the first time. Guys that meet with girls react like little boys sometimes because they are men. Does that make sense? To women it does. To guys it's just a "thing we do".

Movies like Jerry Maguire, whereby Tom Cruise mentioned the words "you complete me" and went all over the world, is practically impossible. Yes, we all know it's a romance movie script but in reality no one can do that by being with another person. The only person that can "complete" someone is that person him or herself. Your partner may make you feel good and such but what "completes" us is ourselves. A spiritual sense within that we can develope with others that we realte to. Think about it.

Bar advice. Movies like this can nice to watch. We all love a happy ending. Who doesn't? How's things with you?

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Bar advice. If you want to get more money tham you can ever imagine, here it is! There's a lot of scams and crap out there but this is the real deal. Don't miss out on this one. What more, it's Free.

Spiritual relationship

What words come to mind when we ment word spiritual. We think of religion and all its practices and laws. Well, I'm not referring to that. We need to see the spiritual interior of ourselves in this world. You're probably wondering what I'm babbling about.

Having a spiritual relationship is the connection that we have with people in our lives that comes from deep within us. If we are in a relationship with someone, be it a wife or girlfriend, we need to ask ourselves one question. What is my intentions? In days gone by, old folks use to ask this same question to the boy that came over seeking for the ladies hand in marriage. A forgotten practice that we should learn from.

Take some time to just write down five things that describe what your relationship is like in your life right now. Don't write things you want or hope it can be but what the situation is really like for you in you heart and mind. If it's boring, frustrating or passionless, just say so. Now get your partner to do the same. If it's all done with sincerity, not to cause hurt or anger and to better the relationship then the results will amaze both people. Why, you ask?

It will strike up conversations between both sides about what they really feel and think about the relationship at that point in their lives. It makes you sit up and take note of the other person. Who they are and what they are still hoping to achieve. Do they feel loved? Am I doing my part? Is there something missing between us? Do I make my better half happy? Many more questions will arise in conversation between both sides on this subject.

The spiritual relationship also acts inside us with other people as well. Our family, colleagues, friends or even people that we meet and never think that we may see them again. Intention plays a major role that shows who and what we are from the inside that brings who we are, out. Would you take credit for someone else's work to please the boss and rob another of the reward when you did not do it? If so, what intentions did you have? Was it for your own glory? Do you hate the other person and want them gone? Are you trying to get ahead in the corporate ladder?

Whatever the situation is or persons that we are interacting with, the intentions come from our inner selves. It is an aspect of our spiritual relationship that works best if we seek it and bring it to light. When it grows with us, we can see our true selves and work the flaws we call human nature.

Bar advice. The connection within a spiritual relationship can manifest the intentions that we want or seek after in our lives.

Relationships that don't take off.

Last week Mindy(not real name), the one that works at the restaurant nearby, came to the bar. "Just killing time to go meet someone later", she said. She started to tell me that she was leaving her company and worse of all, that she and her boyfriend had ended the relationship. No surprise to me actually.

She said that what I had told her before about it not working out and that he was after different things and relationship than her, was true. I wasn't sure if she was alright about it because she didn't really show it. Was she hurting inside? Possibly but she wasn't expressing it. Later I find out that she was calculating her zodiac a year extra because they do that in the Chinese culture. She wasn't a Capricorn/Pig but a Capricorn/Rooster. Now here's what she really is like in character.

Capricorn/Rooster.
Dignified and impeccable, the Capricorn born Rooster cuts a dashing figure. He/She will be well turned out, strong of opinion and honest to a fault. Capricorn's reserve matches the conservative side of the Rooster nature harmoniously. There is little conflict and lots of restraint. The Capricorn/Rooster possesses integrity and autonomy. He/She functions well alone if need be but prefers to be surrounded. Count on the Capricorn/Rooster to do the "done" thing. This person's charm is increased by his/her excellent manners, careful use of words, and ability to find the best in each situation. Capricorn/Roosters worry about how others see them and make heroic efforts to please those who judge their behavior. These people care greatly for appearances but are never guilty of pretension. You won't find one of these noble souls engaged in anything disreputable. Even sex! No. This character is faithful to a fault (if such a thing exists) and not attracted to dealing with deep emotion. He or she is easy to love. Everybody does. But intimacy with such a reserved type is a challenge to say the least.

Now I understand why it was hard to figure out if she was hurting inside. With her character she's not one to really show it. Lot of the other traits are fitting this lovely girl as well. One thing she did admit to me was when I told her she was still a newbie about things like work, people, worldly affairs and of course relationships. Maybe she wasn't all that upset because the relationship was still new and deep feelings had not set in yet. She even said she hoped someone better would come along soon.

The fact that relationships that don't take off when and if we want them to is normal with lots of people. We chance upon someone and hope they will be the one we have been searching for or at least close to it. We don't want to have someone to be humourous only to find out that he can be too much of a clown. Not someone to be a hard worker and find that he/she is not around at all because of work. There's got to be acceptable allowances but fulfills our needs as well. Most importantly they just got to be there for us and committed as well.

Bar advice. In the end we have to remember that it either works out or we need to get out of the relationship we're in.

Missing Kat

Last week, hot ass Kat, didn't show up at the bar on all three days that she normally has salsa dance practice. I was wondering what happened to her but I did suspect that she might have gone for a getaway holiday type thing.

I suddenly got a phone call from her asking if I was already at the bar. She than came up after I said I was there. She looked tired and when I asked where she had been, she told me she was in Phuket. Since there was a public holiday in the middle of the week and a friend from overseas had invited her, she decided to go have some time off.

I said to her,"Oh, so you went there. Got suntanned. Did some swimming and filled you 'bang'." She smiled, as she was drinking, and said "yes." She wasn't trilled that they had her signed up for an amature salsa contest now that she was back and that she needed to put in extra practice. The fact that she just flew in the early morning hours didn't help either.

Later she went for classes and I to work. She dropped by later, had a cigarette and chat a little. We talked about stupid stuff then later when the crowd started to leave I asked her to wait till I closed up. We decided to get some late supper. She wanted to go to the nearby Indian coffee shop but my brain was telling me that I had to go somewhere a bit more lavish. We walked to the road to get a taxi but we were suppose to cross the road. While we were trying to cross and talking at the same time I held her hand. Jokingly saying that I had to make sure we crossed safely. She said I was trying to take advantage of the situation which I completely agreed with and told her so.

We finally got to the place I want to bring her. Swensens. Suppose to be 24 hours but that day it was closed from midnight till 6am. Only Ice cream and coffee available. Why? I also don't know. The Starbucks next to it was also closed. Die, now what? Then she spotted the Coffee Bean nearby. Went there as the lights were still on but they were cleaning up the place only. No more service. Give me a break! We almost walked down when she suggested that we go up as there was a 24 hour place there. Just then we saw the Balcony bar. 24 hours and people still drinking. I went in and asked if they still served snack food. They only had Nachos. Arghhhh!

Finally we got to the Coffee Club on the opposite side. There, we finally got a meal each. She got Evian to drink and I got a beer. After all that mishaps we just went through, I needed one. I knew she was also tired and the fact that she follow me further from her home then where we were from my bar said something to me. I just wanted to be somewhere else with her other than the bar and her salsa classes. Frankly I didn't care where we went or what we did as long as I was in her company.

We had nice time. She showing me pictures of her time in Phuket but some of them was with the guy. We're just friends so it's all good. I like her a lot. She's funny, interesting and the fact that we can chat about anything is refreshing. At the end of the night we got to the edge of the road, after her cigarette, to get taxi. Two of them came awkwardly at the same time and I didn't get to kiss her goodnight. I didn't really think about it till I got home but I wondered if I should have or not. Why?

Well, she's also a customer. A friend. I don't want to have both of us feeling uneasy around each other the next time. Then again, the next time we'll have to see what situation comes up. The kissing outcome may be different. If she's reading this I believe she's fine with all of it.

Bar advice. Last minute decisions can sometimes backfire on you but if you take it all with a bit of humour you'll find it becomes a nice memory for both people.

Courtesy

We all grow up with our parents and teachers all teaching us about courtesy. The problem is when we grow up in this hectic and pressure driven world we forget all about that.

Is it really so difficult to allow someone to pass you on the highway? Can you not say "excuse me" when you're trying to get ahead of someone in a supermarket? There's someone in front of you so let them take the taxi even if it stopped in front of you or at least try to get them to share it.

In our busy daily lives, it's hard to be courteous to others. Sure there are days when things can go wrong but we need to consider others also having a bad day. If we're upset and angry with stuff going on, we can still be courteous with strangers and family. It make things better for society and resolutions for problems become easier to handle.

Behavior is set deep within ourselves. We can choose to do so in good or bad ways. That's why we're thought at young. If we just continue to follow such in our adult lives we become better human beings. Anyone reading this can surely understand what it means to have someone show us courtesy. The feeling is different in vast expects.

Bar advice. We all know it's hard to do at times but as we continue to do so we find our behaviour change in many different ways not only courtesy.

Dealing with bossy people

Among the many types of “difficult” people you will inevitably face in your life are the bossy ones. These are people who, for no other reason than they want to, tell you what you should be doing with your life, how you should be doing it and, everyone’s favorite, what you shouldn't’t have done already.

The thing about bossy people, though, is that they think they’re doing you a favor. Your mother, for instance, simply must tell you to wash your hands (even though you’re nearly 40 years old) because she can’t bear to let you walk around with germs on them. Your spouse, meanwhile, may try to boss you around in the kitchen because he or she is sure you’ll over cook the roast. The potential catastrophes are simply too great to not lend these pearls of wisdom.

To the recipient, of course, being bossed around can be downright maddening, particularly when it’s coming from someone who is probably better off minding their own business. However, you don’t have to let bossy people get the better of you.

How to Handle Bossy People

Nobody likes being bossed around or controlled, you may be tempted to confront the bossy person in an accusatory way, which will surely escalate the situation and leave you with nothing but more strife. So the next time you find yourself with a bossy, controlling person, use these tips to handle the situation with eloquence, class and a positive outcome for you.

1. Confront the person in an appreciative way.
You certainly should address a bossy person’s offensive behavior, but you must do so gently. Start out by showing your appreciation, then stating that you’re happy doing things your own way. (Try, “I appreciate that you’re trying to help me do the dishes more effectively, but I prefer to use the sponge, not the scourer.”)

2. Release your frustrations.
Being bossed around can bring up many negative feelings, including anger, frustration, anxiety and even a loss of self-esteem. The last thing you want to do is internalize these feelings and create an unnecessary source of stress in your life.

3. Stand your ground.
While realizing that most bossy people do have good intentions, you should make it clear to him or her that you have no intention of changing your behaviors. It may be that the person continues to try and control you, but it’s also possible that, upon seeing your confidence, he or she will eventually back down and leave you be. Again, this should be done in a kind, not accusatory, way. (Such as, “Mom, I do so many things around the house the way you do, but when it comes to making salad, I like to cut the tomatoes in quarters, not slices.”)

4. Give them a taste of their own medicine.
Sometimes bossy people may not realize how offensive their remarks can be until they experience it themselves. Next time someone tries bossing you around, experiment with being bossy in return. It may just help to curb the behavior altogether. For instance, if a bossy friend tells you how to get your hair cut, tell them your opinion about how they should be cutting theirs. Just be careful not to go overboard with this and become a bossy person yourself!

We know that the person doing this may not intentionally want to hurt us when it's done and we got to realize that. Even people at work may just want to get things done in a certain way but don't realize that other individuals do things their own way.Sometimes we need to have a confrontation with the bossy person to sort things out before it blows up into a disaster.

Bar advice. Even if the person is your actual boss at work you should be able to stand your ground. Sort things out and get him or her on the same page as you. It's better to deal with it early or you'll be taken advantage of constantly. Same with the people at home.

Things guys say but really mean

Here's a humorous look at things that guys say to their other halves and what they really mean. You'll have a nice laugh.

"I'm going fishing." Really means... "I'm going to drink myself dangerously
stupid and stand by a pond with a stick in my hand, while
the fish swim by in complete safety."

"It's a guy thing." Really means.... "There is no rational thought pattern
connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

"Can I help with dinner?" Really means... "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"Uh huh, " "Sure, honey, " or "Yes, dear." Really means... Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"It would take too long to explain." Really means... "I have no idea how it works."

"I'm getting more exercise lately." Really means..."The batteries in the remote are dead."

"We're going to be late." Really means..."Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."

"Take a break, honey, you're working too hard." Really means..."I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"That's interesting, dear." Really means... "Are you still talking?"

"Honey, we don't need material things to prove our love." Really means... "I forgot your birthday again."

"That's women's work." Really means... "It's difficult, dirty, and thankless."

"You know how bad my memory is." Really means..."I remember the theme song to 'Titanic, the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the vehicle numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot this was the day we got married."

"Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself, it's no big deal." Really means... "I have severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt because I was doing that stupid thing you said not to do."

"I do help around the house." Really means... "I once put a dirty towel in the laundry basket."

"Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing." Really means... "I sure hope I think of some reasons pretty soon."

"I can't find it." Really means... "Help look for it for me. You know where everything is."

"What did I do this time?" Really means... "What did you catch me doing?"

"I heard you." Really means..."I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and I'm hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next days yelling at me."

"You look terrific." Really means... "Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving."

"I missed you." Really means... "I can't find my socks, the kids are hungry and we are out of toilet paper."

"I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are." Really means..."I'm lost. I have no idea where we are, and no one will ever see us alive again."

"I don't need to read the instructions." Really means... "I am perfectly capable of screwing it up without printed help."

Lastly,"I love you dear." Really means..."Forgive me for the big, bad thing I did that I'm about to tell you.

Bar advice. How many of you ladies have heard these things. Remarkable that you understand what it 'really' means when it's explained to you.