Learn how to spice up the game of love and intrigue everyone you meet by finding and flaunting your most bewitching self. Sharpen up your flirting skills by discovering:
* 25 ways to be a great flirt
* how to create an alluring first impression
* how to overcome the fear of flirting
* how to flirt anywhere, at parties, on the job, while traveling, on the phone, in the car, at the health club
* how to dress fetchingly
* where to go, what to do, and with whom to flirt
* and many more tantalizing secrets
Bar advice.Whether you're a shy beginner or an advanced coquette or Casanova, these perfected flirting tips and secrets will soon have you charming the socks off everyone.
Monday, February 5, 2007
How to meet women tonight
You go out with some buddies for a night on the town, hoping to meet a girl to have some fun with. You head to a bar, get a table, and order drinks. The place is alive, and you and your buddies are having a good time looking at all the pretty girls except nobody is meeting any them. You want to talk to them, but you feel more comfortable sitting around with your friends talking about how you would like to go home with a girl that night. Instead, you all end up leaving the same way you came in.Together.
This is a pretty common occurrence among the lovelorn bachelor. This is a symptom of what I like to call the "comfort zone". Basically, everyone has a comfort zone. This is a state of mind where people are surrounded by that which is familiar.Familiarity breeds complacency, which can keep you from taking the action necessary to achieve your goals, because that action introduces uncertainty into your life. This is something the comfort zone likes to keep at bay.
So when you want to meet a woman, you need to know how to break out of this comfort zone.How do you do this? The answer is self-evident. You must learn to meet women by yourself.
Friends can be a great asset, but most of the time, going out with friends actually hinders one's ability to meet women. Not just because of the comfort zone factor, but because other guys who don't know what they're doing with girls can actually ruin the interactions you have with them. Be it by jealousy or ineptitude.
So the best way to counter this is to leave your friends behind. This doesn't have to be permanant but only when you are on the prowl for girl.But the prospect of going out by oneself can strike fear into the hearts of men. After all, doesn't going out by yourself signal to everyone that you're a loser with no friends? Doesn't it make you look creepy? The answer to both these questions is:NO!!!!!
The simple act of going out on your own can shake your comfort zone, because you have no anchors to keep you there. Often your friends will act as an anchor to your comfort zone that keep you from approaching women. And it is easier to break out of this comfort zone without those anchors present. Plus, you don't have to worry about failing with women and being judged by your friends if they're not around.
But the most powerful thing about going out by yourself is that it puts your focus on what you are doing. This means that every interaction you have is without distraction, so it is more easily examined and the problems you had are more easily identified. This allows you to spot your sticking points more quickly and correct them.
Not only that, but being out by yourself gives you the freedom of flexibility when it comes to where you're going and who you talk to. If you're bored with a place, you can leave and go to another one. If you want to talk to a girl who your friends might poke fun at you for, you can. Not only this, but you're free to mess up the interactions you have, because chances are, no one there will ever see you again, so you don't have to worry about what others think of you.
But like all things, knowing what to say will help you to go out by yourself and succeed at increasing your ability to approach. There are many examples of Openers to say in the book 'The Art of Attraction'by Joseph Matthews but some guys will need to know how to handle the inevitable question "Where are your friends?"
Something I've used to great effect is the answer "Oh, they're around." This simple dismissive statement not only answers the question, but as far as anyone knows, you're telling the truth. If you want to take it a step further, I've even used this as an Opener at times I've been out by myself. The "My Friends Ditched Me" Opener.
This works good whenever you're out somewhere by yourself. Basically, you approach your target or a group, and say "Do you guys have any friends who got split up by someone they both liked?"
Using this, you set the stage that you're out by yourself because, well, unlike your friends, you're not lame! Not only that, you throw in a nice Drama Opener in there to engage the group. And if you're still too shy to go out by yourself, then try this little trick.When you go out with your friends, ditch them. Go off on your own and leave them behind for a while, then meet up with them later. This can be quite an effective method if your friends don't mind you leaving!
If you don't know what a Drama Opener is, check it out in the book 'The Art of Approaching'. It's got TONS of openers and other things to say so that you never have to worry about how you're going to meet women again. If you're one of those guys who gets tounge-tied around beautiful girls, or if your mind likes to "blank" out on you, then you definitely need to check out the book right now.
Bar advice.Once you learn the secrets unleash in the book, you'll know how to meet any woman, any time, anywhere you may be.Whether you're alone or not!
This is a pretty common occurrence among the lovelorn bachelor. This is a symptom of what I like to call the "comfort zone". Basically, everyone has a comfort zone. This is a state of mind where people are surrounded by that which is familiar.Familiarity breeds complacency, which can keep you from taking the action necessary to achieve your goals, because that action introduces uncertainty into your life. This is something the comfort zone likes to keep at bay.
So when you want to meet a woman, you need to know how to break out of this comfort zone.How do you do this? The answer is self-evident. You must learn to meet women by yourself.
Friends can be a great asset, but most of the time, going out with friends actually hinders one's ability to meet women. Not just because of the comfort zone factor, but because other guys who don't know what they're doing with girls can actually ruin the interactions you have with them. Be it by jealousy or ineptitude.
So the best way to counter this is to leave your friends behind. This doesn't have to be permanant but only when you are on the prowl for girl.But the prospect of going out by oneself can strike fear into the hearts of men. After all, doesn't going out by yourself signal to everyone that you're a loser with no friends? Doesn't it make you look creepy? The answer to both these questions is:NO!!!!!
The simple act of going out on your own can shake your comfort zone, because you have no anchors to keep you there. Often your friends will act as an anchor to your comfort zone that keep you from approaching women. And it is easier to break out of this comfort zone without those anchors present. Plus, you don't have to worry about failing with women and being judged by your friends if they're not around.
But the most powerful thing about going out by yourself is that it puts your focus on what you are doing. This means that every interaction you have is without distraction, so it is more easily examined and the problems you had are more easily identified. This allows you to spot your sticking points more quickly and correct them.
Not only that, but being out by yourself gives you the freedom of flexibility when it comes to where you're going and who you talk to. If you're bored with a place, you can leave and go to another one. If you want to talk to a girl who your friends might poke fun at you for, you can. Not only this, but you're free to mess up the interactions you have, because chances are, no one there will ever see you again, so you don't have to worry about what others think of you.
But like all things, knowing what to say will help you to go out by yourself and succeed at increasing your ability to approach. There are many examples of Openers to say in the book 'The Art of Attraction'by Joseph Matthews but some guys will need to know how to handle the inevitable question "Where are your friends?"
Something I've used to great effect is the answer "Oh, they're around." This simple dismissive statement not only answers the question, but as far as anyone knows, you're telling the truth. If you want to take it a step further, I've even used this as an Opener at times I've been out by myself. The "My Friends Ditched Me" Opener.
This works good whenever you're out somewhere by yourself. Basically, you approach your target or a group, and say "Do you guys have any friends who got split up by someone they both liked?"
Using this, you set the stage that you're out by yourself because, well, unlike your friends, you're not lame! Not only that, you throw in a nice Drama Opener in there to engage the group. And if you're still too shy to go out by yourself, then try this little trick.When you go out with your friends, ditch them. Go off on your own and leave them behind for a while, then meet up with them later. This can be quite an effective method if your friends don't mind you leaving!
If you don't know what a Drama Opener is, check it out in the book 'The Art of Approaching'. It's got TONS of openers and other things to say so that you never have to worry about how you're going to meet women again. If you're one of those guys who gets tounge-tied around beautiful girls, or if your mind likes to "blank" out on you, then you definitely need to check out the book right now.
Bar advice.Once you learn the secrets unleash in the book, you'll know how to meet any woman, any time, anywhere you may be.Whether you're alone or not!
Sunday, February 4, 2007
Cloud talk
Bar advice. Things that are worth while and some that are idiotic. The meaning of life is ???
Do you need visual romance
This is a pretty amazing movie, that does get graphic in nature and crosses the line in parts of what is art and what is not. Very good story in which Caroline Ducey goes out looking for love when her boyfriend, Sagamore Stevenin refuses to pay any attention to her. Caroline's character finds love in many different forms, men and means. From picking up a lover at a bar (Rocco Siffredi), to finding an older man into S&M, to having a quickie on a set of stairs by a total stranger (which I think is the best segment). A great film from Catherine Breillat.
Bar advice. This is what romance can be like. No boundaries, age or uncertanties. We all have them. We are , after all, human.
Bar advice. This is what romance can be like. No boundaries, age or uncertanties. We all have them. We are , after all, human.
Ahhhh! Romance
Everyone knows that part of dating is romance, maybe I am easy to please, but I think I have known some pretty romantic women in my day. I would love to hear about some of your most romantic experiences.
There are so many romantic memories, many more, but the memories have faded over time. There are some memories that will never fade; one in particular. I think that the most romantic thing that anyone has ever done for me was when a particular someone did a very special thing for me. She made me a meal while I was sleeping. The thing was it wasn't just the meal. We were working the night before at the bar and only went to bed at about 4.30pm that morning and the next day was Sunday ( we don't work on that day) but she got up to go to go to the market and buy the food to make the meal. The romance was what she did and not what she cooked for me. In fact, I can't even remember what we ate. It doesn't really matter because what's important is that I remember what she did. My heart melts when I think back at those things and when I see her smile.
Bar advice.The most romantic things are the little things, things that have a shared meaning, things that are intimate, and personal. Those are the memories that shine the brightest, and I will cherish them forever; maybe I am just easy to please, or just maybe I recognize what truly comes from the heart.
There are so many romantic memories, many more, but the memories have faded over time. There are some memories that will never fade; one in particular. I think that the most romantic thing that anyone has ever done for me was when a particular someone did a very special thing for me. She made me a meal while I was sleeping. The thing was it wasn't just the meal. We were working the night before at the bar and only went to bed at about 4.30pm that morning and the next day was Sunday ( we don't work on that day) but she got up to go to go to the market and buy the food to make the meal. The romance was what she did and not what she cooked for me. In fact, I can't even remember what we ate. It doesn't really matter because what's important is that I remember what she did. My heart melts when I think back at those things and when I see her smile.
Bar advice.The most romantic things are the little things, things that have a shared meaning, things that are intimate, and personal. Those are the memories that shine the brightest, and I will cherish them forever; maybe I am just easy to please, or just maybe I recognize what truly comes from the heart.
Men are 'Dogs'
As dogs today are still pack animals, with the same instincts as "a pack of wolves," it’s important for dog owners to behave like the "Alpha", or leader, of the group. In the wild, dogs would follow a structure, and in the absence of a solid "alpha" leader, the "beta’s" and "omega’s" of the pack would rebel. So as a dog owner, if you don’t make it clear to the dog that YOU are the leader–by eating first, going through doorways first, etc.–it’s all over from there: these wolf-like creatures are going to do the complete opposite of what you tell them to, and even become aggressive and untamed.Sounds kind of like what happens if you let girls run all over you, doesn’t it?
If you are firm and consistent in asserting yourself as the Alpha of your dog’s "pack" (ie, the family household), he will respect you and do what he or she is told. You’ll avoid so many problems, just by taking the time to show a dog that you are the boss.This of course has to be in a loving and caring manner as well because, much like women, dogs want someone who’s in control. They don’t wan’t to take up the role of leader themselves. They’ll actually love you more when you walk around with pride and confidence.
There’s more we can apply to female attraction from alpha dog training. When a low-ranking dog rebels against the "top dog," successful dog trainers do the same things alpha wolves do in the wild. They ignore the dog for a couple days, until it comes back apologetic and willing to do what it is told. If the dog acts well upon return, he is rewarded and given the socialization and attention he needs.As you’ll learn below, you can use this same principles towards ladies you meet at a bar or club.
Of course, you can’t go overboard. A dog that obeys out of fear does not behave as well as a dog who behaves out of respect. In fact, it’s been found that being too assertive and physical with a dog will only lead to aggressive and reckless behaviors. So it pays to be firm, but not brutal. Just like with the ladies. You want to be confident and assertive, but not arrogant and mean. It will get you nothing. Women don't like that sort of behaviour.
Here are some more benefits to carrying "alpha attitude" around the ladies:
By asserting yourself as the leader,someone to be respected not feared,you gain people’s respect. As I said, females don’t want to have to adopt male leadership themselves; they just want to be around someone who’s not afraid to be a stand-up, assertive kind of man. But let me be clear, women don’t want an insecure guy who feels he has to act macho and sexist to get his buddies’ approval. Like so many jocks, a guy who naturally acts confident, and expects people to show him respect. That’s what you’re aiming for, and that’s what women who are worth your time want.
Conversely, by being the "follower" instead of the "followed," people, especially girls, will treat you as what you present. Someone who’s not a leader, someone who’s not confident, tough, and full of power; in short, someone who’s not full of value. You get what you give, so it’s up to you to give a lot! The rewards will speak for itself.
When a girl, particularly one you’ve just met at a bar or any social venue, treats you with disrespect, it’s up to you, as the "alpha male," to ignore her. Shut her out, move on, and she’ll eventually come back to you the same way a dog would, with her tail between her legs, apologetic, and hungry for your respect. But don’t address her until you’re sure you have her respect, otherwise you’re allowing her to "move up the pack," which, as with dogs, will only create future problems.This actually goes to show why guys who ignore girls, get more than those who dote on them and act needy. It’s all evolutionary.There is , however, the exception of some that are bitches and will never come back. With that in mind, who needs those. it's good to have found that out early.
Conversely, when a girl treats you well, gives you love, and yes, does as she’s told (though I’m not suggesting you guys bark out commands!), you must treat her with respect. This especially applies to girlfriends, but also a girl you’ve only known or dated shortly. Show your thanks, show your appreciation, the same way an alpha leader would display love and affection upon a well-behaved canine.
You can even apply the alpha dog training to dates. These things must be done from time to time.You must decide where to eat on a date (don’t let her choose the restaurant!), you musn’t be afraid to eat first (although social conventions do dictate that we must wait for both our plates to be served!), and you should get the choice of wine.The girl will actually respect you for it, much more so than if you bashfully gave up the choices to her. Again, retain your position as the "top dog."
Finally, you have to show that you’re an alpha not just one-on-one, but also in groups. An alpha wolf doesn’t gain his position by submitting to others in the pack.He asserts himself in front of others and makes it known that he’s the leader. That doesn’t mean you treat your buddies and strangers like crap. It just means you don’t let them push you around. In short, you must be what the guy I think has the whole "alpha attitude" down pat, Carlos Xuma, calls "being a stand-up guy." That means standing up for yourself and standing up for your girl, by not taking crap from anyone. You don’t have to be a jock to let people know they can’t push you around.
Quite the contrary. Xuma knows that in order to be big, you’ve gotta think big, and he does this himself by adopting alpha characteristics. What are some great alpha characteristics? In his 'Secrets to Becoming the Alpha Man' course, Xuma rattles off a number of them, including being:
Clever.Smart.Cunning.Ambitious.Excited.Honorable.Dominant(not aggressive, but demonstrating superior social skills).Stable.Fit(healthy lifestyle)Curious.Balanced.Natural
Doesn’t sound like you? No worries.Just dig deep within yourself and get that Alpha male out in the open. Watch other guys or learn from books, ebooks or videos to get that essence of alpha attitude. I know some of the things here sounds out of character for you but there are times when this needs to be done.
Bar advice. It pays to be alpha. The best part is, you don’t have to be a player to do it. The lasting reward is feeling good about yourself, and getting the girls all the other alpha males get. What’s wrong with that? When you got her you will become the Alpha and Omega(the first and the last) in her life.Woof!
If you are firm and consistent in asserting yourself as the Alpha of your dog’s "pack" (ie, the family household), he will respect you and do what he or she is told. You’ll avoid so many problems, just by taking the time to show a dog that you are the boss.This of course has to be in a loving and caring manner as well because, much like women, dogs want someone who’s in control. They don’t wan’t to take up the role of leader themselves. They’ll actually love you more when you walk around with pride and confidence.
There’s more we can apply to female attraction from alpha dog training. When a low-ranking dog rebels against the "top dog," successful dog trainers do the same things alpha wolves do in the wild. They ignore the dog for a couple days, until it comes back apologetic and willing to do what it is told. If the dog acts well upon return, he is rewarded and given the socialization and attention he needs.As you’ll learn below, you can use this same principles towards ladies you meet at a bar or club.
Of course, you can’t go overboard. A dog that obeys out of fear does not behave as well as a dog who behaves out of respect. In fact, it’s been found that being too assertive and physical with a dog will only lead to aggressive and reckless behaviors. So it pays to be firm, but not brutal. Just like with the ladies. You want to be confident and assertive, but not arrogant and mean. It will get you nothing. Women don't like that sort of behaviour.
Here are some more benefits to carrying "alpha attitude" around the ladies:
By asserting yourself as the leader,someone to be respected not feared,you gain people’s respect. As I said, females don’t want to have to adopt male leadership themselves; they just want to be around someone who’s not afraid to be a stand-up, assertive kind of man. But let me be clear, women don’t want an insecure guy who feels he has to act macho and sexist to get his buddies’ approval. Like so many jocks, a guy who naturally acts confident, and expects people to show him respect. That’s what you’re aiming for, and that’s what women who are worth your time want.
Conversely, by being the "follower" instead of the "followed," people, especially girls, will treat you as what you present. Someone who’s not a leader, someone who’s not confident, tough, and full of power; in short, someone who’s not full of value. You get what you give, so it’s up to you to give a lot! The rewards will speak for itself.
When a girl, particularly one you’ve just met at a bar or any social venue, treats you with disrespect, it’s up to you, as the "alpha male," to ignore her. Shut her out, move on, and she’ll eventually come back to you the same way a dog would, with her tail between her legs, apologetic, and hungry for your respect. But don’t address her until you’re sure you have her respect, otherwise you’re allowing her to "move up the pack," which, as with dogs, will only create future problems.This actually goes to show why guys who ignore girls, get more than those who dote on them and act needy. It’s all evolutionary.There is , however, the exception of some that are bitches and will never come back. With that in mind, who needs those. it's good to have found that out early.
Conversely, when a girl treats you well, gives you love, and yes, does as she’s told (though I’m not suggesting you guys bark out commands!), you must treat her with respect. This especially applies to girlfriends, but also a girl you’ve only known or dated shortly. Show your thanks, show your appreciation, the same way an alpha leader would display love and affection upon a well-behaved canine.
You can even apply the alpha dog training to dates. These things must be done from time to time.You must decide where to eat on a date (don’t let her choose the restaurant!), you musn’t be afraid to eat first (although social conventions do dictate that we must wait for both our plates to be served!), and you should get the choice of wine.The girl will actually respect you for it, much more so than if you bashfully gave up the choices to her. Again, retain your position as the "top dog."
Finally, you have to show that you’re an alpha not just one-on-one, but also in groups. An alpha wolf doesn’t gain his position by submitting to others in the pack.He asserts himself in front of others and makes it known that he’s the leader. That doesn’t mean you treat your buddies and strangers like crap. It just means you don’t let them push you around. In short, you must be what the guy I think has the whole "alpha attitude" down pat, Carlos Xuma, calls "being a stand-up guy." That means standing up for yourself and standing up for your girl, by not taking crap from anyone. You don’t have to be a jock to let people know they can’t push you around.
Quite the contrary. Xuma knows that in order to be big, you’ve gotta think big, and he does this himself by adopting alpha characteristics. What are some great alpha characteristics? In his 'Secrets to Becoming the Alpha Man' course, Xuma rattles off a number of them, including being:
Clever.Smart.Cunning.Ambitious.Excited.Honorable.Dominant(not aggressive, but demonstrating superior social skills).Stable.Fit(healthy lifestyle)Curious.Balanced.Natural
Doesn’t sound like you? No worries.Just dig deep within yourself and get that Alpha male out in the open. Watch other guys or learn from books, ebooks or videos to get that essence of alpha attitude. I know some of the things here sounds out of character for you but there are times when this needs to be done.
Bar advice. It pays to be alpha. The best part is, you don’t have to be a player to do it. The lasting reward is feeling good about yourself, and getting the girls all the other alpha males get. What’s wrong with that? When you got her you will become the Alpha and Omega(the first and the last) in her life.Woof!
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