Relationship advice on what we want.

Why do we sabotage what we really want in our relationships? That's a great question and one we've been living with in our own lives and I'm sure that you've run across it from time to time.

There are many possible reasons why people unconsciously destroy something that's going well. One of the main ways is having the belief that you don't deserve the happiness, the praise, the passion, the good feelings and all that. There seems to be an imaginary ceiling that allows just so much happiness, success, passion or anything else that we say we want in our lives. Why should there be a cap on it? A relationship is giving but remember it's also receiving. Many people are afraid that their relationships won't last or they feel that he or she will leave them anyway so somehow, either consciously or unconsciously, they do something to push the other person away.

We see this a lot when there's fears. Why allow fears such as fear of abandonment either physically or emotionally, beliefs that keep us from having the great relationships and lives that are available to all of us? These fears are for the most part unconscious and we might not even be aware of them. Sometimes it may have been triggered because of failed relationships previously. It can also happen when we see our love ones or friends have bad relationship problems. While we are continually working on this within our own relationships, our partners support is important to ease doubts and fears.

The obvious thing would be to first identify your beliefs and fears that are holding you back from having the relationships and life that you want. What is it that you believe, even on a deep subconscious level? Once you've identified these beliefs and fears, then explore whether you are willing or not to allow them to keep you from having the relationships that you want. Are you willing to change those beliefs? Make a commitment to allow yourself to feel good and to have what you want. A belief is like a habit and if you don't like one that holds you back, you can change it. One at a time.

Understand that chaos and disruption in your life is normal and you should expect it when you challenge old ways of being and take on a new belief system especially one that is empowering. People may be used to you acting in a certain way and they might be uneasy when you begin to change. When or if your life feels overwhelming, take a moment, breathe and center yourself. If you do, you will find a calmness in your chaos and you'll be able to move forward from fear to joy.

In every relationship that you have, start being as conscious as possible in all ways. Consider whether your words and actions will build the relationship and take it higher or weaken and possibly destroy it. Take some time to figure out if and how you sabotage yourself from having the relationships and life that you want. If you do, your life will just get better. We sensible and reasonable with others as well. Your partner may not have the same fears or doubts and could see it as if you don't have the same interest as he or she does. This could cause relationship tensions. Clear the mind so you can be open to welcome the goodness of what is happening with you and your partner. Let there be bliss.

Bar advice. Communication with your partner is important so they understand you and not feel there is a problem in the relationship or themselves.

What women are lookin for in men.

The behavior of women is as much of a mystery to men as men is to women. However, one thing is certain. The women love to be wooed. They want to be pursued. They want to be courted. They want men to try and win their affection.It’s a great psychological game that both men and women play. The winners enjoy it; the losers end up wondering what went wrong.

To end up as winner men need to understand what women want. Here is a list of seven qualities that every woman expects to see in their men:

Well groomed.
Do women pay attention to the way a man is dressed? Yes.Do women want men to open doors for them? Even in this age of liberalism they want and long for the days of chivalry.

Just as men like their women to be pretty and gorgeous, women like their men to be well groomed and stunning. They expect their men to be courteous, well behaved and well mannered. Among other things, they expect them to know the social graces. They also expect them to be well dressed, and in tune with the fashion of the day. Men who are loud or obnoxious are unlikely to win the attention of sensitive women. The same applies to those men who don’t pay sufficient attention to the way they look.

Good listener
Should men do what women want? Listen carefully to what a woman say.

All women want their men to pay attention to what they are saying. Men may not agree with their thinking but they should not make the mistake of looking bored or causal. They must pay attention, even if they don’t intend to do what their women want. The very fact that their point of view was considered before a decision was taken is enough to make the women happy. It is the basis of a strong relationship.

Good in bed.
What do women want in bed? If you think it's just the sex,think again.Do women like to be forced?How can women be made happy?

Every woman wants her man to be good in bed. They want to be aroused, and to be sexually fulfilled. The relationship has to be equal in the bed. The man must make an honest effort to fulfill the sexual needs of his women He should, however, not take advantage of a relationship. But he should respect those days when the woman wants to stay off. Women don’t like to be pushed into sex unless they are in a mood to do so. They would much rather prefer being cajoled and cuddled instead of being rushed into sex.Women want the passion in it. Men just need a place.

Honest and sincere.
Do women want to know everything about their men? Should men tell everything to women?

Two qualities that women value in their men are honesty and sincerity. They don’t want their men to cheat on them or to hold back anything from them. They would like to be equal partners in both the joys and sorrows of their men. Very often men try to hold back their problems related to work or their finances. This is not a good policy. Women feel more wanted and involved when their men take them into confidence. Men should also not try to delude women into false notions. They must gently inform them of their problems without being blunt or cruel. No woman wants to be told that she is ugly, fat or dumb. But, at the same time, they would not like their men to lie to them about their looks.Worse thing.Being honest upfront will not be hard when skeletons in your closet come out.

Stable career
How important is financial stability? Are women after successful men?

Women want stability in their lives. They don’t want to be in a situation where they are forced to scrounge for favors. They would like their men to take care of all basic necessities of life. They would therefore prefer men who are successful and well organized. However, this does not mean that they want to hook the rich and the well placed. This is a wrong notion. Money and success alone is not enough to satisfy a woman.Just take Hollywood as an example.

Love for surprises.
Should men give lavish gifts to win the love of women?Gifts that women cherish the most.

No woman wants to be tied to home and children. She would like some excitement in her life. This is where men need to be imaginative and thoughtful. The surprises need not be big. They can be as simple as enjoying an evening at the theatre, followed by a dinner at her favorite restaurant or it can be driving down to a resort at the weekend. The joy is multiplied if these bonuses come unannounced.Watch her smile at the smallest and silliest thing you did to please her. They deal with emotions and sentimentality

Intelligent and witty.
Are witty men more charming?How does intelligence matter in a relationship?

Women like their men to charm them. They would like them to be intelligent and witty, who can liven up the evenings and make a room come alive. Men who are dull and boring or too obsessed with their own musings are unlikely to enchant women. Women like men who are willing to chat with them on their wavelength.Take Marilyn Monroe as an example. She was married to Arthur C Clark. The guy who wrote the book 2001 A space Odyssey. Not forgetting that she was later involved with the president of the US as well.

Bar Advice.Go and rethink about what your girl wants or needs and ask yourself this. What have I done recently to put a smile on her face? Now go do something about it.