Faults

What can I say? Faults, we all got them. These faults can be something psychical, in our character, what we say, our behaviour or how we work. There's also the strengths and weaknesses that we have in dealing with others like family, friends and the relationship were in.

Stop what you're doing right now and go look at yourself in the mirror. Do you like what you see? At times I don't. If you say you do then great but most will agree with me that they would rather change something that they see as an imperfection. Why? It's just that people want to be seen the way they want others to see them so what they were born with is never good enough. Look at the women that go for beauty pageants. Do you think they got there because they were born like that? Most had stuff done before they joined the pageant. For some the mirror is a friend. For others it's their worst nightmare.

Lets look at what we are like inside. Everyone has faults in their character and being. How they behave and what they do can make the most handsome man or beautiful woman look ugly. Kindness and gentleness towards others sometimes seems soft and wimpy to some. It doesn't go well in the business and that's why a lot of women have a though time in the corporate world. Being shy won't land you that job. Gossiping about others will label you a bitch. Doing whatever the boss says makes you a "yes" man. Taking on extra works puts you in bad light with others because they think you're over ambitious. No one will talk to you because they think you're in cahoots with the boss.

Even going to lunch can be difficult. People start to criticize everything about you and even make fun about your clothes, the way you eat, the way you talk or what your hairstyle is like. If you're a woman it gets worse when all the other ladies are gossiping rumours about an affair that never happened but someone tarnished your reputation by making stuff up. They talk about your short shirt, low cleavage blouse, your shoes or your flirting (made up) with male colleagues. Guys have to worry about their language and comments with their female counterparts or find a sexual harassment complaint go up to the boss. Are all these faults that need correcting? Who is really at fault here?

In a relationship it can get really bad as well. Some people end up in divorce because the person they marry turns out to be a monster in disguise. You ask, "what happened to that sweet boy that brought me flowers?" or " why is this girl stuffing her face with so much food everyday that she now looks like a watermelon?" We find that the person we went out with and the person we live with are from different planets. Some live like slobs and expect everyone to pick after them even after marriage. Some like to cut their toenails on the bed or pick their nose and flick the booger out the window. They forgot that they had individual lives before. The smallest of things eventually adds up and divorce or a break up happens. All this is just what happens at home. Can you imagine going out in public?

All these faults are just the tip of the iceberg. There's some far worse than this. We all got them. We're not perfect and we can never be. However, we can change ourselves. Habits and life choices can be altered. We sometimes forget that others see us differently and we don't see all these faults till it's pointed out to us. Take the advice from good friends or love ones and you might just find a huge change in your life.



Bar advice. The seven deadly sins are the extreme ends of this but there are people that have them. Stay clear of these ones.

Love and marriage

A student asked a teacher. "What is love ?"

The teacher said, "In order to answer your question. Go to the padi field and choose the biggest padi stalk and come back. But the rule is, you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick another."

The student went to the field, went through the first row and saw one big padi stalk, but he wondered, maybe there is a bigger one later. Then he saw another bigger one but thought may be there is a even bigger one waiting for him. Later, when he finished more than half of the padi field, he start to realise that the padi was not as big as the initial one he saw, he knew he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted it. So he went back to the teacher with empty hands.

The teacher said "This is love. You keep looking for a better one, but when you realised it, you have already missed the right one"

"What is marriage then ?" the student asked.

The teacher said, "In order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is, you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick another."

The student went to the corn field. This time he was careful not to repeat the previous mistake. When he reached the middle of the field, he picked one medium corn that he felt satisfied himself and came back to the teacher.

The teacher said, "This time you bring back a corn. You look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you got. This is marriage."

Here is a lesson that represents what we do in life. How we loose sight of what is right in front of us. We can continue to search for love. We hope for the best decision when it comes to choosing the person that we marry. Can it be so difficult? The answer is yes. We make it difficult. We place all kinds of barriers in front of us. Things like pleasing our parents. Searching for a comfortable life. Working to achieve success and having no time for relationships. Not seeing eye to eye with others. Thinking that material things comes with marriage. Not open to change or setbacks in a relationship. Not understanding that the simple things and opening of ones heart is real love.

Most guys by forty and gals at thirty five find that they may have "missed the boat" when it comes to settling down. It looks bleak at times. The main reason is that we don't put in the intention of marriage in our heads. Some had a bad experience with a guy/girl. Thrusting a person may become difficult. Mostly it's because in this day and age people don't think of rushing into marriage. There's lot's of opportunities that they don't want to miss out on. The last thing on their minds is to be tied down forever.

We end up later in life watching our friends playing with their children. Seeing people walking their kids down the aisle. Others kissing each other and holding hands. We start to imagine what it would be like to have been married and not be so lonely at times.

Bar advice. It's still not to late. Put yourself out there. Join a singles social network or go online like friendfinder. There's a lot of people that are in this boat still looking as well.