Wednesday, March 12, 2008

The formula that many girls use to control guys

What is this formula? Lets look at some of what girls do and why. Meet the behaviorist.With these "behaviorist" type girls, I'm about to explain about, it's a constant manipulation that never ends until they get bored or you get wise. By the way, if I sound too harsh with all of this revenge talk, don't worry. One of two things will happen when you learn the secret to pulling yourself out of the "behaviorists" clutches.

When she misses out on a nice guy like you either she'll find another chump(or several more) to replace you or maybe she'll realize that she wants to drop the BS and hey, maybe she just missed out on something great(you) and she better shape up before she misses out again. The ironic thing here is that guys and girls can be behaviorists. Lets see what I mean.

"Behaviorists" more often than not learned how manipulation works inside and out by gaming their fathers( mothers for guys) for attention. How can you tell if she's a behaviorist type girl? It's actually pretty simple. Though you do need a little bit of information about her to figure it out. Here's the test.

If a girl seems to like you, find out why(do this directly by asking and also indirectly by noticing clues). There are two kinds of "answers" that she can give. Here's the test.

Answer for girl type #1. "The way you *behave* makes me happy."
Examples of this would be. "You gave me one of the happiest days of my life, I spend time with you, that should tell you how I feel about you, because new years was so much fun, because I like the way you look and dress."

Answer for girl type #2. "I admire certain qualities about you."
Examples would be, "Because you're intelligent, because you're kind and I feel safe around you, because I find you're good looking, because you're so respectful of people, because you're a good man."

Now lets do the self test. Have you already guessed which girl type you should turn tail and run as soon as you identify? Before I tell you, let me give you a little bit of the psychology behind what's going on here, and maybe if you don't already have it, you'll get it before I spill the beans. Now, with the second type of girl, the quality girl, her motivation is going to be to encourage you to become smarter, kinder, more respectful and all around better in your qualities as a person. The first type, the behaviorist, that we're warning you about is motivated to direct your energies towards getting you to behave in the way that she likes. She operates on a reward/punishment type of plan with you. A girl who likes you for your qualities doesn't need to reward and punish you, but a girl who likes you for your behavior will think that she does. Yes, the first kind of girl in the example above is the type of girl to drop like a hot potato. As for the second, please don't tell me you can't figure it out.

Now, if these behaviorist type girls are made out as vampires, then where are their fangs? Empty promises of future value. With the behaviorist type girl the manipulation will almost always center around the hope that she'll follow through on some promise, spoken or implied. Really, that's how almost any con artist works, if you think about it. That doesn't mean she'll break every promise. Heck, you might even get sex sometimes but the pattern will be one of lies and half truths with a trail of broken promises.Here's an example from online dating.

The biggest trap when it comes to online dating is the virtual relationship. These can go on and on and they center around behaviorist type girls bilking you for what they want. A good buddy to chat with and the possibility of more but only if she wants it. There's always the promise that you'll get together and perhaps even a great degree of virtual intimacy but there's no payoff at least not one worth your time. It may not be all online dating site with girls like this but because there's so many it's hard to tell who is the 'real deal'.

Bottom line. Cut the behaviorist totally out of your life, including out of your thoughts and you will be way happier. Plus, then you'll actually be ready when the 'real-deal' girl comes by. This may sound like crazy advice for anybody else listening including but what you end up with in a behaviorist is a girl who doesn't love you at all. She just "loves" when you behave the way she likes. Once her premise is that of your behavior and not your personal qualities, are what makes her happy, then there's really nowhere else for her to turn but to conditioning your behavior.

When you identify a behaviorist, don't try to "beat" them or "get" them back, or find some value in them. Instead move pass. Don't hesitate and waste time. If another girl was already in your bed, you wouldn't care about the behaviorist, right? So, realize that right now, and forget about behaviorists immediately. You don't have to wait until you replace them. Besides, you'll be a lot more successful in finding the right replacement if your mind isn't all clouded with the wrong one.

Lastly. "Quality women" aren't at fault for the existence of so many behaviorist women that suck your life dry. As a matter of fact, they are probably more frustrated by the behaviorist women than you are. After all, it's not the quality girl's fault that she doesn't make the wild promises that a behaviorist will make. Which puts a genuine girl at a disadvantage unless you know how to appreciate that they are better for you. This is the formula that many girls use to control guys. Sad to say it but it's true but I know there's a lot of good women out there too. However, at least you guys are armed with some knoweledge.

Bar advice. Here's how I see it. A "7" who likes you for your qualities is really a "10" while a "10" who wants to control you is a "0"

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