The other day Keli(not real name)came by the bar with the same friend. It was several weeks since she was there. I have her phone number as well as email address but did not contact her because she said she would come by to settle a bill for one jug that they drank but would pay for later.
When they got there, Keli was first in the door, followed by her friend. I was placing a CD in the machine. She smiled at me but never said hello. The other girl just walk behind her. They went to the seat so I went up to get their order first thinking that Keli would be courteous enough to open her mouth with a general greeting or at least make the assurance that they did not forget about the money owed. Instead, her friend just ordered the drinks.
I went and got them and brought it to the table. As I placed it on the table I said, "I thought you all forgot about the bar" No real response from them so I went to the main bar. I started to wonder what was happening. I remembered that she was in my email list of customers. I sent out my normal monthly emails to all in the list so it may have struck her that she forgot about the money and that's why they were there. Later I thought, could it be that she wasn't talking to me because she read the first blog I wrote about her and the friend.
They later asked for a snack menu. They giggled while walking away and then I saw Keli adjusting her blouse. The last time she had the tight blouse with buttons almost popping out. This time the top button was undone. What's a guy to do? Got to look, right? She is hot after all.
I was busy with other people but twice that she went to the toilets, she had to pass me but smiled only and never stopped to chat or anything. Upon the second time she went, her friend quickly called me for the bill. When I told her the price, I included the previous amount. She actually went over the amount with me twice and only after I told her about the former bill, did she pay. No arguments either. That only tells me that they knew about it and was just waiting to see if I would ask for it or had forgotten about it. When Keli got back to the seat the friend told her that what she paid. They sort of had a laugh and left without saying goodbye. Keli still just all smiles only.
I was kind of disappointed that there was no other interaction from Keli. I'm still unsure if her friend, or her, is a lesbian. Maybe she's not or even the friend but the friend seems to be in a "high class stereotype" but can't pull it off. Keli looks like the sweet girl she is but shouldn't follow others advice that are self destructive. They're both lawyers so why try and pretend that there was no debt? Why ask me twice about the amount and pay with no deliberations after a reminder about the debt? Lawyers are suppose to be honest and have integrity, not look good and get away with it.
The worse part about all this is that Keli just doesn't get it. Nobody cares if she or her friend may be a lesbian or not. The thing is any guy wants to know a gorgeous women. He'd like to talk to her or better still have her come talk to him. His ego is filled when this happens in front of other guys. After all it's only a conversation. Also, even if the friend is not a lesbian who is after her, at least the friend shouldn't be so stuck up as to think that being a lawyer makes you better than others. People like this look superficially at others and judge them. They feel that others who are not in some professional field, wealthy, business and so on, are not able to converse with them on any level or subject.
People like this have labels and classification for others but they dislike others judging them or talking about them. Keli and others like her that follow friends like this loose out on life and people that could otherwise be advantages to her in her life. Who is to say what can make you happy, smile, laugh or love. The world is made up of many different people and just like a book, don't judge it by it's cover.
Bar advice. Any lawyer should know right from wrong. Good from bad. Truth from lies. Friends from bitc.........
Showing posts with label judge others. Show all posts
Showing posts with label judge others. Show all posts
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Being self righteous
It is possible to be just a little self-righteous and therefore not cause much offense to anyone, people who are too self-righteous may:
Be quick to judge others
Belittle those around them
Be smug
Act condescending
Be narrow-minded
Be intolerant of other people’s faults
Believe that they have the answer for everyone else’s problems
And more...
Meanwhile, self righteous people often have a very hard time being empathetic. They only view the world through their own eyes, and cannot even fathom walking in someone else’s shoes. People who are too self righteous are also too sure of their own opinions. They will stick to them at any cost, and often refuse to hear opposing arguments. They will also never change their opinions based on new information they have received. They also hate to take people's advice.
What often drives excess self righteousness is fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of losing control, fear of realizing you may have been wrong but if you release this fear to tap into your inner ability to let go of negative emotions, you will find that being more open-minded and less judgmental is actually freeing. The method to just shake off the fear and be at peace may also be helpful to your state and well being. To release the need to always be right can make you experience empathy and welcome the thoughts, ideas and opinions of those around you.
Bar advice. No one in the world is right all the time. You're only losing yourself in a world of denial. Anyway, who wants to be around someone like that. Think about it.
Be quick to judge others
Belittle those around them
Be smug
Act condescending
Be narrow-minded
Be intolerant of other people’s faults
Believe that they have the answer for everyone else’s problems
And more...
Meanwhile, self righteous people often have a very hard time being empathetic. They only view the world through their own eyes, and cannot even fathom walking in someone else’s shoes. People who are too self righteous are also too sure of their own opinions. They will stick to them at any cost, and often refuse to hear opposing arguments. They will also never change their opinions based on new information they have received. They also hate to take people's advice.
What often drives excess self righteousness is fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of losing control, fear of realizing you may have been wrong but if you release this fear to tap into your inner ability to let go of negative emotions, you will find that being more open-minded and less judgmental is actually freeing. The method to just shake off the fear and be at peace may also be helpful to your state and well being. To release the need to always be right can make you experience empathy and welcome the thoughts, ideas and opinions of those around you.
Bar advice. No one in the world is right all the time. You're only losing yourself in a world of denial. Anyway, who wants to be around someone like that. Think about it.
Labels:
advice,
bar advice,
being self righteous,
belittle,
condesending,
faults,
judge others
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