Showing posts with label old maid. Show all posts
Showing posts with label old maid. Show all posts

Friday, July 13, 2007

True happiness

A lovely girl who I recently discovered online and revealed this blog to had asked about true happiness and my stand on it.

What is it and how to get it?(Remember this for later)

The fact that we are even looking for "true happiness" shows that we are lacking in what we don't have in our lives right now. There can be many issues that are leading us to seek for it. Some may be financial. Some depression and feelings of sadness. Others, and more commonly, the lack of a genuine partner and the feeling of being loved. Of courses there's other reasons as well.

If you've ever been in love you have this carefree, over joyous, nothing can go wrong, zest in your everyday life. It's like a volcano exploding inside you heart every time he/she calls, comes over, emails, SMS or whatever else. He/she fills your senses and emotions, including your bang, and you're in ecstasy with pleasure till it suddenly falls apart. Then what?

Out of the blue things just seem to turn around. Everything starts crumbling down on you and it seems that no one will help, let alone listen to your problems. You sob like you lost you family pet. You listen to sentimental songs over and over again. You keep asking God and yourself, why? You try to figure out what went wrong. You start to miss all the good times you had with your partner before. More fucking crying till everyone at home, including friends, stay out of your way for the next three months, and all for what? Your "true happiness" that you were after.

Where is that true happiness going to come from? Firstly, if you're hoping for it to come falling from the sky and knock you on the head, think again. Lot's of us have it preprogrammed into our heads from parents, teachers, family members, social groups and more that true happiness is something tangible or material. It really is what others see it to be and not what we desire. Somewhere down the line, from our childhood up, we were told what "true happiness" is suppose to be. When we grow up and we search for those things, it becomes the illusion that we finally see and the reality of despair from ever finding it becomes all too real.

When we are not attached to anyone, no partner and alone for some time, we firstly imagine the worst. What's going to happen to me. Ladies have the stigma of being called an "old maid" or "left on the shelf" by everyone so they get more upset than guys. Magazine companies make a killing from subscription by women trying to seek advice and topics on these things. They seem to want to find some magic answer that is eluding them because they connect being married, financially stable, children and so on as "true happiness". Talking to friends sometimes doesn't help because their worse off in that department as well or they're still in the sobbing stage themselves.

True happiness can mean different things to different people. Someone making a lot of money everyday in the stock market will say so. My brother flying to another country constantly will say so. Me making love to a gorgeous girl will say "hell yes this is happiness". Even an astronomer looking at the stars everynight will say so even if he sees the same thing daily.

What is my take, she asked? Firstly, as I mentioned earlier, everyone has a take on what true happiness is. What does it matter what mine is? Is mine more so important like how parents and teachers and so forth drilled into everyone that we don't know what it is at all and we try to achieve it only to fail because we didn't really know what it was but following what others told us it was. Does this make sense to you? The fact is we all want "true happiness". Who can give it to you? No one. It has to come from the individual to create it and manifest it into what their heart makes of it and share it with others. Take my bar advice on the matter.

Bar advice. If you ask yourself, what is it and how can you get it(remember above), the answer lies only within yourself. Nobody can give it to you. How do you feel at this moment determines your true happiness now and in the future?