Sunday, April 20, 2008

Asking for help.

People often avoid asking for help for two reasons. Either they are embarrassed at needing assistance or they feel they can go it alone and succeed without others involvement. However, everyone needs help sometimes and knowing when, and how, to ask for it can save you time, headaches and a lot of emotional stress.

Whether it’s help to move house, start your new business or taking the kids for a weekend trip, the premise stays the same. Here are some tips to ask for help when you need it.

Release your need to be in control.

Often, we resist asking for help because we don’t want to loosen our grasp on the idea that we are in charge. As you release your need to be in control you realize that you can reach out for help when it is required and know when you can simply support yourself. Stop thinking that others will look down on you so you have to put this false front of being in control.


Let go of your negative feelings about seeking help.

As you let go, you discover that it is OK to ask for help, and it is OK to not ask for help; you feel like you have a choice and this makes it easier to do what is best for you. Why give energy to negative feelings or thoughts when you are in need of help. Use that energy to overcome the problem by asking for help. The faster you solve it the better you'll feel.

Talk about your problem directly.

You don’t need to make excuses or apologize. Simply explain the situation and the help you need. Sometimes simply allowing others to listen to you or be there for you is exactly what you need in the moment to break through emotionally or to solve a problem that has been plaguing you for a long time. People will have advice and maybe criticism about your problem but it's expected and normal when someone is about to help. They just have your interest at heart and don't want to see you in any, or the same, difficulties again.

For many people, the four letters are akin to a four-letter word, one that should never be uttered. HELP! Why do we have to shrug to open our mouth when in need? Most of us believe that we must be self-sufficient and that asking for help is somehow a sign of weakness or forces us to be vulnerable or dependent on others. This belief causes us to not reach out when we need to or when it is in our best interest.

Bar advice. The reason that there are others on this planet, is so we can help each other. We can't do it alone. Ask.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...
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WOMEN TOYS said...
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