Monday, November 5, 2007

Making a first date a good one

This is more for the guys really but it also applies to ladies on certain points. When you're out on that first date, it's a mindset at the very first appearance in front of the other, you'll either sink or swim.

The way you approach, greet, talk and lead is going to make a girl feel comfortable with you. Women sometimes need to give the guy a little break because most guys are nervous when it comes to dating. Being on a first date makes everyone a little dumb and clumsy. Can you imagine the guy trying to pull your chair out at the table to sit and letting you slip on the floor instead of sliding it back in for you? Disaster big time.

Another thing will be having the meal. It's no big deal to order something you're familiar with than ordering something on the menu that sounds nice but taste like crap later and makes you go to the toilet every ten minutes. For a guy it may not be bad but for a girl going in the loo with her high heals and dress, disaster again.

What to say on the first date? You know what most guys do, they ask the same thing that the woman heard before. Once again calamity in the works. How? By making it boring. Flooding it with common and mundane topics. Such "yawn topics" include "Do you like your job?" "What does you parents do?" "What hobbies do you have?" She'll answer but her mind goes mostly "Zzzzzzzz..." By now she must be thinking this is not just your first date but your only date you ever had.

No one likes to answer predictable questions from dates gone by. A guy needs to stand out from the rest of the wolf pack. Something a guy can do is take time to read some women magazines. Be it your sister's or from the doctors office. Check out what's the latest gossip. You could also go online to check celebrity news or Hollywood drama. These things sometimes helps especially when it involves her favorite stars. The conversation becomes lively and heated, not in anger, but with lustful imagination and sexy, playful thoughts. Ask her who she likes best and if you got some stuff on him, use it to stimulate her inner feelings. It will surface and you benefit from her hormones. The quiet evening will become a rock concert.

Possibly, if you know her interest before hand, gather info on her interest then research it so you have something to chat about. You also got to let her do some talking and you some listening.

You got to end the evening with something to make her want to go out with you for another date. What to say? Tell her you want to cook her dinner and watch movies with the same celebrity you were just talking about for your next date. You could also tell her you want to go dancing on the next date and tell her she can't say No because you won't be able to take her strolling by the beach on the third one. These planed and thoughtful things will get her off guard and pleasantly surprised by a different sort of guy that she's never been with before. You'll be amazed to find that she's the one calling you to say goodnight on the phone; an indicator that she's thinking of you.

Women sometimes like a guy but just won't say it so the guy tends to feel pressured to end the date quickly before, and I'll say it again, disaster strikes. He'd rather save whatever self esteem he still has and head for the hills, so to speak. At this point I must say that women are the ones that sometimes don't know what to do. They expect the guy to know and do everything all the time so he has to do all the moves to succeed but in reality she should try to make the situation a little more pleasant as well and not so stressful. What harm can it do to meet a guy half way in the date. He'll sense it as well and knows that you placed some effort in it. This will make him more at ease and your date will be all the more fun.

Bar advice. Dating is suppose to be fun. Not a chore that needs the approval of another or you'll be going on"first dates" for a long time to come and never get to the second, third or more.

1 comment:

Emmyrose said...

This is a very insightful thoughts in dating :)