Monday, September 3, 2007
Sex when getting older
One of the most important ways to continue being sexual is to masturbate, masturbate and masturbate. Partner sex for older people might pose certain problems due to physical disability or lack of an available partner because of divorce or being widowed, but making love to ourselves is readily available and highly desirable. When we were young it helped, didn't it?
We can also share masturbation with a partner, and by that I mean she does herself and he does himself, or we can take turns doing manual sex for each other. The erotic hand job breaks us out of our rigid heterosexual role conditioning that says there's one "right" way to have sex. The man on top with a "boner," holding back until his beloved comes and then finally coming himself.
That's not likely to work for either the older male or female. She doesn't like intercourse because her vaginal lining is too thin, and besides, she seldom if ever had an orgasm from the "missionary position" anyway. He can't perform like a stud because he has lower back problems and he needs more direct stimulation to get and keep an erection. So now they can finally relax, and share a sexual activity that works for both of them. Most likely that will be manual sex, oral sex, or sharing masturbation.
Many things can still be done to have contentment with a partner when older. It's not abnormal if you both understand that you can't go on sexually the way you did when you were young. Do you think he can still ejaculated six or seven times a night. He'll be lucky if he can stand up after the first one that took two hours to come in the first place. What about her? Is she able to spread and bend her legs back like a contortionist? She'll probably need back surgery after that.
Be realistic. Find that common ground. Do what is capable but enjoy what you have still. Sure his penis can't come to attention so easily or her tit's are sagging till her waist but if you are young at heart you can still fire up those cylinders. It will take longer to get it going and both need to tell the other, at times, what they want done to feel good. Helping one's self is also good even if your partner is not around. This helps you get into the sense of you body and helps motivate your usage of those parts that are sexual. Remember the saying, use it or loose it.
How wonderful it would be if we can all still perform that way sexually when we get older. Kids or teens that think their parents aren't "doing it" are way off because sex is never far from anyone's thoughts. Can you imagine what younger people will think if anyone saw their seventy year old mother shaking the half limp penis of their father in a steamy shower? There will be non stop worries and queries and everyone from other parts of the country will be called and told of the story. The fact that two people having sex with each other at that age seems unnatural to most. It is not in their mindset as yet because they have not become that old yet so it seems weird. Tell that to the two love birds.
If you see a woman or man that's older looking at younger men or women, do you think their not interested. Wishful thinking will be wanting to be young again. Have you ever notice the look on older men or women at a wedding? When they get to dance with a younger man or women, their face lights up with a smile. They feel alive and not out of place. Touching, feeling, caressing, kissing and more is all important to continued self pleasure even if the full act of making love is not possible. It's just a feeling of being alive and well. Anyone that thinks an older man or woman is not thinking about sex will only find out later in life how blur they were about this subject.
Bar advice. Remember one piece of advice about older people. They're only old, not dead and sex is for everyone that can, still.