Monday, April 16, 2007

How to make it work?

Ever run into a brick wall, so to speak, with your mate? Can’t
seem to pass “Go” without collecting 200 fresh wounds? Well,
it’s time to build a bridge and tear down that brick wall. Here
are your tools:

1.ATTITUDE – Get an attitude adjustment first. Lighten up and do
a 180-degree about face. Read the Sunday comics, grab an old
comic book, turn on the Comedy channel, watch funny videos or
DVDs. Get in a better mood and pass it along to your mate.
Invite your mate to tune in to comedy with you, too.

2. FRIENDSHIP – Go back to being friends for starters now that
you’re in a good mood. Forget the love stuff, if you want. And
just focus on being good friends; share compliments, do things
for one another, go out and have fun together, enjoy one
another’s company.

3. RELAX – Let your hair down. Trust and relax. Be yourself.
Don’t let old wounds open or fester. Forget the garbage
memories and just be in the here and now together.

4. TIME OUT – If possible, spend extra time together for
awhile, like during your original courting days. Hire a sitter,
order out, eat at fast food places, grab ice cream cones and go
for walks in the park. Get to know each other all over again.
That’s the key. Then you’ll remember why you fell for each
other in the beginning and history will hopefully repeat

5. COMMUNICATION – Take it slow and easy. Keep away from
subjects that you don’t agree upon. And slowly re-learn to
communicate with each other all over again. If necessary, and
it’s not a crime or shame – get help. Seek a trusted friend or
adviser, a church clergy member or certified professional
counselor. No need to go it alone. Find your weak areas and how
to over come them and plan for future communication

6. GOALS – Gradually develop goals together so you’ll have a
direction to head. Write them down in a notebook just for the
two of you. And over time, develop them, revise them, cross
them off your list. The idea is to have goals together and work
towards a common goal.

7. SCRAP BOOK – Create a memory album together. Add photos,
clippings, menus and anything that reminds you of the “good
times.” Then when tough times comes, you’ll have something to
“hold on to” – your bridge to romance.

Bar advice. So don’t just sit back and sulk. Take short steps to improve
your relationships and let life’s problems magically pass by
while you hold on to your relationship.Work your own magic.

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