Monday, December 18, 2006

To the left

If you have heard Beyonce's song or seen the video then you'll feel that it's just right if you're in that situation. This could go both ways. Guys and girls. The song can be seen that way.

What do you do if you get that situation going on with the person you are with? The time will come when you say enough is enough. The holiday season is current and it's not the time for quarrels and such but what do you do if things are bad in a relationship? First thing that we think of is that we don't want to be alone. Especially this time of the year. Then we think of how we will be looked at by others when they see that you're not with the other by your side. Some may congratulate you while others may frown at you. This brings me to this story of this girl Christine who was with this guy Tom.

Tom was not as educated as her and was very jealous whenever she talked or interacted with other guys. He was also younger than her a couple of years. They were together a few years till Christine ended her job because the company closed down. She had three kids to look after and this guy was becoming more like the fourth kid that she didn't want. She confided in me about a lot of things that went on in their daily lives. From him acting like a dad to her kids, that she didn't like, their quarrels and all the way to their sex life. Even to the point of telling me that his penis was too small to satisfy her. We laughed at that together but she wasn't laughing all the time. Mostly it was tears that she showed. It seems that Tom took her in the sense like she was his wife. Trouble is, he wasn't.

It got to a point where she was frustrated with all of his faults. Asking her for money, when he knew that she had been cheated by someone recently, to getting her to foot the travel fares for them to go to Thailand for a holiday. She wasn't able to get a job for a while and he was always making things worse for her especially since she had three other mouths to feed. She had bought him clothes and jewelry before and he never did anything really nice for her. Every time he wanted her it was for his own pleasure and not her needs sexually or supporting her financially. It came to a point when she could not take it anymore. Then one day it happened.

Things just got ugly. He started accusing her of being with someone else. Not having time for him and understanding him or his problems. She got so mad that she slapped him in front of relatives and friends and took all his stuff and threw it out of the house. Day after day he kept calling and pleading her with SMS messages to come back. She actually met him once after that and it turned out to be another disaster that evening. More so it confirmed to her that it was totally over.

She's doing all right now. Got a new job and changing homes. No guy with her as yet but she said she was going to hold off and not jump in with both feet till she was ready.

Bar advice. When I asked her what was the best thing about what happened after all that. She said that it was the sense of liberation and total freedom again that made her feel that she could soar like an eagle and she knew that things would somehow work out.

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